


Victoria Hand and the Four Bears

by RomanoffonamoR



Series: Marvel Cinematic Littleverse [21]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Age Play, Big Isabelle Hartley, Big Nick Fury, Big Phil Coulson, Big Victoria Hand, Bigs and littles are known, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Disabled Character, F/F, F/M, Gen, Little Bobbi Morse, Little Clint Barton, Little Maria Hill, Littleverse, Maria is a little pretending to be big, Marvel Cinematic Littleverse, Multi, Non-Sexual Age Play, Past non consensual loss of fertility, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Referenced past child abuse, Slight disability shaming by random douchebag OC, adventures in babysitting, little Natasha romanoff, past insecurities related to a physical disability, past loss of a child, referenced past Little abuse, referenced past torture, referenced past waterboarding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-14
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2020-05-07 18:07:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 43,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19214734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RomanoffonamoR/pseuds/RomanoffonamoR
Summary: With Coulson leaving for New Mexico in a few days the group finally decides to tell Victoria Hand about Maria's status as a Little.They then rope the poor unsuspecting agent into babysitting The Four Bears during the upcoming holiday weekend.





	1. Chapter 1

Victoria Hand smiled brightly as she watched the toddler playing peekaboo on her laptop screen. The tiny two year old giggled endlessly as she placed her right arm over her eyes and then pulled it away, repeating the motion over and over while the figure seated behind her shouted “peekaboo!” in sync with the baby’s actions. It was all too precious and Victoria wished for nothing more in that moment than to be at home with her Soulmate and their child.

She couldn’t go home though. Not until Bobbi’s debrief, whenever that ended up happening. Her agent’s quinjet had returned almost two hours ago but her phone remained silent. Bobbi would have called ahead if she’d wanted her to meet her in the hanger, and medical would have called if something had happened to the girl that would have prevented her from making the call herself. It was hard, but Victoria knew she had to stay put until Bobbi reached out to her. She couldn’t smother her in the same way she could her actual daughter back at home.

Which was fine, really. She’d been Bobbi’s handler for almost seven years now and her “official unofficial” Heartmate going on six. She knew what her Little needed in terms of care and attention and she respected the girl’s boundaries as best she could when the situation allowed it. As long as Bobbi wasn’t currently on her deathbed then her silence meant she either didn’t need her right now or she was up to something she didn’t want her to know about. Since Barton hadn’t been paired with her for this particular mission Victoria chose to believe it was the former option instead of the latter.

“Hey, what’s with the forehead wrinkles? Stop thinking so much and start basking in the cuteness that is our baby girl,” the figure on the screen spoke up, interrupting Victoria’s thoughts. She couldn’t help but relax and eventually begin smiling again when Isabelle Hartley’s face appeared, her lover having bent down to the same level as the laptop’s camera.

The child giggled as her mother wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close so she could pepper kisses all over her face and head. The girl’s wispy blonde hair was pulled up into two identical pigtails, a rather impressive feat considering Izzy only had one hand to work with.

“Aww Elly-belle, is your Mommy being silly?” Victoria cooed, laughing along with the toddler as Izzy made overly exaggerated kissing noises. She loved watching her partner interacting with their daughter. It still felt surreal sometimes, being mothers. Adopting Gabrielle had been the most terrifying yet ultimately rewarding experience of her life so far, even more so than bonding with Bobbi. Adopting her daughter had been a carefully considered and agonized over choice. Her Heartmate bond with Bobbi had been an unexpected, and at the time, less then desired accident.

She had just been promoted into a leadership position at the Chicago branch of SHIELD’s Sci-Tech division. She wasn’t even supposed to _be_ in DC that weekend except for the fact her recently ex-boss in Atlanta had bailed at the last minute on an important director’s conference and there had been no one else available with high enough clearance to go in his place. She had never even been to the Triskelion before let alone met and chatted with all the different heads of SHIELD’s numerous Science and Technology departments.

Her new boss, Anne Weaver, had also been there and it had been incredibly surreal interacting and conversing with her as if they were suddenly equals. She hadn't even been _thirty_ at the time and yet everyone had acted like she’d had just as much experience and clout as they did! Hadn’t they known she was an imposter? That she’d only been there because John Garrett had decided to go dark at the worst possible moment?

In reality no one had cared or even seemed to notice that she’d been two full clearance levels below the rest of them. Or that she’d had no idea about the majority of projects they’d been discussing. All that seemed to matter was that she had been dressed appropriately and that she had shaken the right hands at the right moments. It had been terrifying, but also exhilarating in a way. She’d always imagined that one day she’d be considered within the upper echelons of SHIELD, but never that quickly, and never with as little leadership experience as she’d technically had at that time.

So in hindsight she was rather glad Garrett had thrown her to the proverbial lions. Not only had attending that conference helped to significantly advance her career but it had also resulted in her saving the life of the girl who would eventually become her agent and Heartmate.

“Hey Vick, do you think Elly’s old enough for some colorful streaks in her hair? I was thinking blue to match her eyes, but we could always go with red if you want the two of you to match.”

Victoria blinked a few times, not quite sure she’d heard her partner correctly having once again been stuck inside of her head. “I swear to god Iz if I come home and find you’ve let a single chemical touch our baby girl’s pristine, virgin hair--”

“Not even Kool-aid?”

Victoria narrowed her eyes. “Not even Kool-aid. Not until she’s older, we’ve talked about this.”

Izzy scrunched up her face in clear disappointment but decided not to press the issue. Which actually set off a few warning bells in Victoria’s head, but before she could reiterate how serious she was about her lover not desecrating their child’s gorgeous hair the phone on her desk began to vibrate with an incoming text message. Dammit. She’d have to table this discussion with her lover for another time and just hope Isabelle wouldn’t do something drastic behind her back.

“I gotta run Iz, I think Bobbi’s debrief is starting. Gabrielle’s hair better still be blonde when I get home,” Victoria gave her lover a pointed look. She then began making cutesy kissing motions at the screen. “Bye bye Elly sweetheart. Momma’s gotta go to work now. I’ll see you both for dinner.” The toddler on the screen began waving her hand in that way toddler’s did where they clapped their fingers to their palm. She repeated the motion back at her, only stopping when the video feed went dead.

Victoria then sat there in front of the blank screen for a few moments before sighing in resignation. Her daughter was going to have blue hair when she got home, she just knew it.


	2. Chapter 2

“Agent Hand, I’m glad you could join us. Please, have a seat,” Director Fury spoke up the moment Victoria stepped into the level eight conference room.

The text message she’d received hadn’t been from Bobbi but from her friend and fellow handler Phil Coulson. The fact he’d instructed her to meet them in the increased security conference room and not their typical level seven one concerned her, but not nearly as much as walking in and seeing everyone else already at the table, staring at her expectantly.

“What’s going on?” Victoria asked, narrowing her eyes first at Coulson and then at the agent sitting directly to his right in what was technically _her_ seat. “What happened Romanoff? You get lost on your way beneath the table?” she asked, cracking a smile as the woman flipped her the bird and then began twirling around in her stolen office chair.

“Agent Romanoff has decided she’d rather wait until after the debrief to drop,” Coulson explained as he reached out and gripped the Little’s chair in order to keep it stationary. “Go ahead and take Sitwell’s spot. He won’t be joining us for this meeting.”

“Alright…” Victoria drew the word out suspiciously as she entered further into the room. She spotted a bare foot poking out from beneath the unnecessarily long table as she walked and she prodded it with the toe of her boot. The indignant yelp that followed made her smile despite herself and she took a moment to nudge the girl’s foot once again. This time instead of whining in displeasure Bobbi pulled her foot further beneath the table and out of reach.

“So is someone going to tell me what’s going on or am I gonna have to guess?” she asked as she took a seat next to Romanoff. It occurred to her then that there was someone else missing from the room apart from Sitwell. “Where’s Hill? Wasn’t this her Op?” Victoria looked to her left where Romanoff was now picking at a scab on her knee. Alright, something was definitely going on. Why was adult Romanoff here and not her handler? Unless… unless something had happened to her?

Jesus Christ, was Hill dead?!

“Relax Vick, the mission was a success. Agent Hill’s fine, she’s just--” Coulson trailed off, gesturing with his head to the space in front of him. Across from where he was sitting was Hill’s empty chair, so his response made no sense whatsoever.

“Invisible?” Victoria asked, raising a single eyebrow at her coworker. She wasn’t being serious, not really. They may have been meeting in the extra secure conference room but there was no way SHIELD scientists would have been able to design and produce a successful stealth suit without word somehow getting out about the project. For a super secret spy organization SHIELD was notoriously bad at internal leaks.

Coulson made an amused noise as he shook his head. He then gestured towards the conference table with both his head and his hands.

Since Hill was clearly not on top of the table she understood he must be implying she was under it, which made even less sense since that space was meant to be for dropped Littles. And okay, sometimes their handlers as well if the mission had been particularly rough, but since Romanoff wasn’t dropped it made no sense for Hill to be beneath the table without her. Unless she was down there comforting Bobbi? Why would Bobbi want Agent Hill instead of her?

Victoria couldn’t help the spike of jealousy that shot through her at the mere thought her Little might prefer another Big’s Care over her own. Sure she’d been spending a lot more time at home ever since they’d adopted Gabrielle but that had been two years ago. Bobbi had gotten over her insecurities _ages_ ago, or so she had thought? What if she had only been seeing what she’d wanted to see and all this time Bobbi had been upset with her?

“Just look under the damn table,” Fury instructed as he leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed behind his head.

Okay what the _fuck_ was going on? Victoria had never seen him look so casual during a level eight debrief _._ They were setting her up for something, that was clear now, but what? It wasn’t her birthday, it wasn’t an anniversary, so what the hell could it be?

Deciding to trust that they wouldn’t do anything _too_ crazy, she slowly leaned back in her chair until she had a clear line of sight beneath the conference table. She’d already known Bobbi was there but she hadn’t been expecting Agent Hill to be curled up on the cushions with her. I mean, she _had_ been expecting it since Coulson had all but confirmed that’s where their co-worker was, but she hadn’t been-- Wait a second.

 _“Oh my god!”_ Victoria mouthed silently, her eyes growing wide as she took in the visual before her. Agent Hill, no, _Maria,_ was curled up in Bobbi’s embrace, both of them wearing standard post mission “gym” clothes. That on its own wasn’t shocking, she herself had had to strip out of ruined tac gear a time or two. Just because handlers weren’t technically “in the field” didn’t mean they didn’t end up in the field if the mission required it.

No, what was shocking was the fact that Maria Hill was very cleared dropped. _Little_ Dropped. As in, Maria Hill was a Little.


	3. Chapter 3

“I have to say out of you, Bobbi, and Clint, you’ve had the best reaction so far to finding out,” Romanoff broke the silence with a grin.

“That’s because she’s not reacting at all. She’s in shock. We broke her,” that was Coulson, and even though Victoria wasn’t looking at him she could _feel_ the smirk on his face.

Without shifting her gaze from the scene beneath the table, Victoria raised her right hand and flipped both Romanoff and Coulson the bird.

“Ain’t nobody broke nobody, Agent Hand is reacting the way we’d _hoped_ she’d react,” Fury spoke up this time.

That got Victoria’s attention and she finally drew her focus upwards and across the conference table towards her boss. “So is someone going to actually start explaining why Maria’s been lying to everyone? Or why I’m suddenly being brought into the circle of enlightenment? Does this have anything to do with Bobbi? She’s not her-- Jesus christ, she’s not her _Soulmate_ is she?”

The outburst of laughter to her left immediately answered that question, but now also opened up a whole new one. “Is she _your_ Soulmate, Romanoff?” It made sense now that she thought about it. She’d always assumed the two were Heartmates, but since they both were Little that would mean they were actually Soulmates.

“And what if we are? Are you gonna tell the boss man on us?” Romanoff squared her shoulders, sitting up straighter in her chair. She didn’t sound all that serious but Victoria still leaned a few inches in the opposite direction of her.

“Other than the fact that he clearly already knows, why would I tell? Soulmates aren’t against the rules at SHIELD.” Victoria pointed across the table to where Fury was watching them both rather intently. Or as intently as he could with only one eye.

“Actually they kind of are. Page 37 of the Rules of Conduct. Paragraph C. Subsection 4.”

“You’re a freak, Phil. You know that, right?” Victoria smirked at her friend.

The sound of movement underneath the table brought all of their attention back to the two Little’s sprawled out at their feet. Bobbi had sat up and was now climbing over Maria’s body so she could get to her Heartmate. Victoria pushed her seat backwards a few inches in preparation for what she knew was to come. Even though she was taller than Bobbi by an inch and a half, the girl had way more muscle mass and so was considerably more dense.

“Hello my girl,” Victoria welcomed cheerfully as Bobbi pulled herself from beneath the table and then climbed up into her lap. The armrests on these conference chairs were thicker than their usual ones so it took a few moments of awkward shifting around before the Little was able to wedge both of her knees onto the seat beside her hips.

“Hi Momma,” Bobbi replied quietly as she leaned forward and rested her head on her shoulder.

Victoria felt her insides turning to mush at the cuteness that was her Little girl. She instinctively began to swivel their chair back and forth a few degrees, knowing the motion soothed her Heartmate. Not that Bobbi seemed distressed or anything, but even when she wasn’t dealing with her overactive sensory issues she still liked to be rocked.

“Were you being a good friend? Helping to keep Little Maria safe and comfortable?” she asked, smiling when she felt Bobbi nod against her neck.

“She’s my sister. I gots to protect her,” Bobbi explained.

“She’s your sister, huh? Well isn’t that special. Is she your big sister or little sister?”

When Bobbi didn’t immediately answer Romanoff responded instead. “Ria’s six, so she’s a big sister to me and a little one to her.”

“And Clint as well?”

“Mhmm. Poor guy thought he had it bad when it was just the two of us,” Romanoff grinned, indicating herself and Bobbi.

That got Victoria to smile, at least until a new thought suddenly crossed her mind. “And is he-- I mean, are the four of you-- _you know.”_ She made a circular motion with her hand. It wasn’t very demonstrative of what she was implying but thankfully Romanoff seemed to understand what she was getting at.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but no. We’re not like that. We’re the ‘Four Bears’ when dropped but as adults Maria’s with me and I think sometimes with Bobbi?” Romanoff drew the last part of her sentence out as if it were a question more than a statement. “But she’s never with Clint. That would just be weird.”

Victoria huffed in amusement at what the girl considered ‘weird’. “But she _is_ your Soulmate, right?”

Romanoff nodded, a smile creeping back across her face.


	4. Chapter 4

There was suddenly more shuffling from beneath the table and then a brown head of hair appeared by Romanoff’s knees. The six year old’s hair was pulled back into a crooked half ponytail that hung partially over her left shoulder while the rest of it flowed messily down her back. 

It amused Victoria to see the blatant disparity in skill level between whoever had done the girl’s hair and her lover back at home. Isabelle was missing her left arm from the elbow down and could have easily done a better job making the ponytail neat and straight. But then again the disheveled look kind of added to the six year old’s charm. If Maria were somehow transformed into an  _ actual _ physical child right now Victoria would have put money on her missing her two front teeth, she was that cute.

“You wanna come up here and say hi to Victoria?” Romanoff asked, patting her thighs in the way one would when trying to entice an animal to climb into their lap. Done by anyone else it would have seemed insulting, but for some reason it didn’t feel that way between the two. 

Victoria watched as Maria started to nod but then hesitated, her gaze shifting briefly to where she sat still rocking Bobbi left and right. On instinct she stilled the motion of her chair. The Little in her lap made an unhappy whining noise in response so she began rubbing her back in small circles instead. 

When a handful of seconds had passed with Maria still not moving into Romanoff’s lap, Victoria began to wonder if she should just move her chair further down the conference table. But before she could offer this as a suggestion the man on the other side of Romanoff cleared his throat.

“Hey Ria, how ‘bout you come sit in my lap instead?” Coulson spoke up, shifting his own chair a few inches away from the table so there would be room for the Little to maneuver over to him. 

Victoria cocked her head at the sudden suggestion, intrigue flowing through her as she watched the Little shuffle around until she was seated by his knees now instead of Romanoff’s. 

“A little birdie told me you’ve had a really rough few days. Do you know what helps make all of those icky bad feelings go away?” Coulson asked, lowering his voice as well as his shoulders. When Maria shook her head he continued, “Lots and lots of kisses and cuddles. Do you want some kisses and cuddles sweetheart?” 

Victoria actually found herself holding her breath as she watched the interaction unfold. Even though she’d seen Coulson behave this way hundreds of times with the various agents in his care, this time it felt different. This time it felt special. 

Oh my god, did that mean Coulson and Maria were Heartmates!?

The realization hit her with such ferocity that Victoria actually let out an audible gasp. Thankfully Maria was too focused on Coulson to notice. Romanoff however turned her head and gave her a  _ look _ that very much told her to keep her mouth shut. Which made absolutely no sense unless… unless they were Heartmates but weren’t bonded? 

Oh man, what if they hadn’t bonded because Maria wanted to keep pretending she were a Big? Not that spiritual connections were always obvious to onlookers, but even if they were they could have likely gotten away with acting as if they were Soulmates. 

Victoria thought back to when her and Bobbi had first taken the plunge. She’d already been working as her Handler for four months when they’d both finally agreed to make things official between them. Bobbi had originally been resistant to the idea of bonding since she’d believed she would scare her off the moment her ‘issues’ became apparent. Victoria mentally rolled her eyes at the memory of that awkward yet extremely emotional conversation. 

Once they had gotten all of their ‘baggage’ out of the way and officially became Heartmates the transformation in her agent had been the difference between night and day. Now whenever Victoria felt in the girl even the slightest spike in emotions all she had to do was open her arms and the Little would fall right into them as if that’s how they were meant to fit together. Prior to that it had sometimes been a struggle to get Bobbi to let go around her. 

So maybe Maria was worried about the same thing happening to herself if she bonded with Coulson? Right now she could very clearly keep her Little side in check, but if she opened herself up to a Heartmate bond perhaps all of that control would go right out the door?

Victoria felt her own heart aching at the thought of her friends denying themselves this connection. As difficult as it sometimes was being bonded with a fellow SHIELD agent, she wouldn’t have traded Bobbi for anyone else in the world. 

Shaking her head to clear the memories away, Victoria now watched as Maria continued to hesitate about climbing into Coulson’s lap even though it was apparent that she really, really wanted to. She once again thought about offering to move, or perhaps even to leave the room entirely, but before she could formulate the sentence Coulson leaned over and placed his hands beneath Maria’s armpits, tugging her upwards.

“Upsy daisy,” he spoke as he struggled to lift the Little into a standing position. It wasn’t so much that Maria was resisting but more so that she was heavy and the angle was extremely awkward. At least he was far enough back from the table that there was no chance of accidentally banging her head on it. 

Once Maria was upright she seemed to forget about her nervousness and opted to finish the relocation of her own accord. But instead of allowing Coulson to pull her into his lap in the same way that Bobbi was sitting in Victoria’s lap, she turned 90 degrees and seated herself sideways across his thighs. 

Victoria made a conscious effort to remain quiet as she watched Maria tuck her head against Coulson’s neck in order to hide her face from view. It was a serious struggle though since the Little was being so ridiculously cute and all Victoria wanted to do was squeal in delight at the couple before her. Even if they weren’t officially bonded Maria clearly perceived Coulson as her primary Caretaker, and maybe even as her Papa? 

Oh man, Coulson was finally a Papa and she couldn’t even tease him about it! Not without potentially revealing the girl’s secret to the world. 


	5. Chapter 5

The room descended into a comfortable silence for the next few minutes. Victoria had resumed rocking Bobbi left and right but had also begun drawing patterns on the exposed patch of skin on the girl’s lower back. Bobbi’s adult self could easily read Cyrillic writing but she wasn’t quite sure if her Little self could. Since Victoria never passed up an opportunity to learn something new about her Heartmate, she began spelling out the Russian equivalent of ‘your brother is a poopyhead’ on the girl’s skin.

It took quite a bit longer than it would have her adult counterpart but eventually Bobbi began to giggle and nod her head vigorously against her neck. “Da,” she replied once she’d stopped laughing.

“Don’t tell him I said that,” Victoria whispered quietly against the Little’s ear. She’d switched back to English since there was nothing more suspicious than whispering in a foreign language during a level 8 debrief. _Especially_ a language that only three of the room’s occupants understood.

Not that she herself was all that fluent in Russian but she had picked up enough words and phrases over the years to be able to converse with her Heartmate in it. Actually, she’d learned bits and pieces of almost _two dozen_ languages on account of Bobbi’s linguistic prowess. Mainly the inappropriate curse words so she could tell if her Little was attempting to skirt the ‘no potty mouth around the baby’ rule.

Gabrielle had only begun talking in simple phrases about two months ago but her vocabulary was already quite a lot larger than other children her age, at least according to Isabelle. Victoria was often too busy at work during the day to bring their daughter to playgroups so most of her knowledge of how Elly compared to others came from the reports her Soulmate gave her. Usually at night when she was trying to fall asleep. Izzy could talk for eight hours straight about their daughter if she let her, and in the beginning after they’d first brought their baby girl home she had no choice _but_  to let her. It was the only way she could remain connected to the experience. 

On the surface SHIELD had an extremely generous family leave policy for its agents that included not just biological childbirth but adoption as well. Victoria had been all set to take a full three months off to stay home with her wife and their newborn baby girl, but an extremely volatile humanitarian crisis had arose in Northern Africa and she’d been one of only a few agents that had the proper clearance levels as well as the language skills needed to set up a massive interagency operation there.

Isabelle had been more than a little upset when she’d found out that she was leaving for an unknown amount of time. They hadn’t even had two full days together with their child and according to her overly tired and emotional lover she was already “putting SHIELD above her family”. Her wife had been right, of course, but it had still been an extremely unfair and hurtful thing to say. A hundred thousand lives had been at immediate risk of extermination and she’d been one of only a handful of people in the world that had the ability to make sure that didn’t happen.

So Victoria absolutely _had_ to go. There was no way she could have ever justify to herself, or to SHIELD, that she’d let a mass genoicide happen simply because she’d wanted to stay on maternity leave. She’d also known that Isabelle’s _actual_ reason for wanting her to stay wasn’t because she was jealous of her commitment to her job, but because she was deathly afraid to be left alone with their newborn on account of her disability.

Isabelle had been grappling for months with an intense fear of screwing everything up once they brought their baby girl home. Even though it had been years since she’d lost the majority of her left arm in a traffic accident while on duty as a cop she still had trouble doing certain basic tasks by herself.

Cooking something more complicated than what could be placed in a microwave was one of them, but mostly it was laundry, and the dishes, and any domestic chore that required the usage of two hands for optimal performance. It wasn’t so much that she _couldn’t_ wash and dry a plate with one hand, it’s just that the time it took her to do so was time she now needed to spend making sure their daughter’s more basic biological needs were taken care of.

Isabelle had also confessed to her a few weeks before the adoption had been finalized that she was absolutely terrified of the thought of giving the baby a bath by herself. At the time it had seemed like a random, inconsequential thing to be afraid of. Just another entry onto Isabelle’s already lengthy list of insecurities where motherhood was concerned.

Victoria couldn’t help but wince at how wrong she’d been back then. Isabelle’s fears hadn’t been random or inconsequential, they’d been absolutely justified when taking into account the circumstances of her job. SHIELD had always come first in their relationship, and despite swearing up and down that it would be different once their daughter arrived, in the end it hadn’t been. Victoria had still gotten into her car and driven away while a tearful Isabelle watched from the window of Gabrielle’s newly converted nursery.

Thank god everything had worked out in the end and she'd been able to return home less than a week after she'd left. But still, choosing to leave her wife and daughter in the first place had been the hardest decision she'd ever had to make and she just hoped and prayed that she'd never have to make a decision like that ever again. 

“Momma sad?” Bobbi’s voice quickly broke Victoria from her less than happy thoughts. The Little began to shift slightly in her lap, the girl’s legs most likely having begun to tingle or grow numb from her prolonged kneeling position over her thighs.

“What?” Victoria asked, a bit startled by her rather apt question. She brushed some of Bobbi’s hair behind her ear so she could better see her face. The Little still had her forehead tucked against her neck so she had to crane a bit to be able to see her expression clearly. She looked concerned, and possibly even a little anxious? Victoria was honestly surprised the girl hadn’t started stimming yet.

“Oh, no honey, Momma’s not sad. Not really. She’s just doing that super silly thing where she thinks of sad stuff for no reason whatsoever, but I’m not _actually_ sad, I promise,” Victoria explained as she began to rub Bobbi’s back once again, but this time in basic circular patterns. She also brought her other hand up to the back of the girl’s head so she could comb her fingers through her hair and scratch gently at her scalp.

Bobbi didn’t seem convinced at her words and Victoria tried her hardest not to laugh at the girl’s quirked eyebrow. It was an expression she’d learned from mimicking Isabelle and it made her heart ridiculously happy to be reminded that the two loves of her life were as close with each other as they were with her.

“Pumpkin, Momma’s not sad, she could never be sad with you around,” Victoria reiterated, but in Russian this time. Everyone else in the room was already watching them and listening so what did it matter at this point if they acted a little suspicious? Romanoff could always translate for Fury if he really wanted to know what they were saying.

Bobbi hummed happily in response and snuggled her face further against Victoria’s neck. “I love you Momma,” she replied, also in Russian.

“And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why Page 37, Paragraph C, Subsection 5 exists.”

Victoria rolled her eyes as she once again flipped Coulson the bird.


	6. Chapter 6

_Bobbi hummed happily in response and snuggled her face further against Victoria’s neck. “I love you Momma,” she replied, also in Russian._

_“And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why Page 37, Paragraph C, Subsection 5 exists.”_

_Victoria rolled her eyes as she once again flipped Coulson the bird._

*****

Coulson gasped in fake outrage at the hand gesture Victoria was giving him. “Really Vick? In front of impressionable youth?” He nodded to the Little in his lap even though Ria didn’t seem to have even noticed the middle finger salute. Her gaze was focused solely up at him from where she had her head resting on his shoulder.

“Four,” the girl whispered, raising her left hand as she spread out her fingers while folding her thumb against her palm.

“Hmm?” Coulson cocked his head to the side as he instinctively began to rub Ria’s back in encouragement.

The Little furrowed her brow and brought her hand back to her chest, tucking her arm against herself as if for comfort. “Four,” she repeated, this time even quieter than before.

“She means Subsection 4. Earlier you’d said ‘Paragraph C, Subsection 4’, but just now you cited Subsection 5,” Natasha explained. Coulson watched as she tilted her body in her chair so she could better see the Little in his lap.

 _“Oh.”_ He immediately understood what the issue was now and he felt his heart swelling inside his chest at how adorable the six year old was, even if she was technically wrong. Subsection 4 was about Soulmates, while Subsection 5 pertained to Heartmates. Not that he was going to tell her that of course.

“Well aren’t you just the smartest little girl ever. Thank you, Ria, for correcting my mistake,” he told her, making sure to keep his voice gentle and encouraging and not at all reminiscent of someone who might have been angry at being called out about a supposed error.

Coulson knew more than he probably should know about Maria’s childhood. The girl’s father had been a right sack of shit and had instilled in her a wariness of not just authority figures, but also of caretakers. It was one thing for a child to be afraid of an angry teacher or maybe a mean police officer, but to be afraid of their father? Someone who was biologically programmed to want to love and protect her?

He also knew quite a bit about the Big whom Maria had lived with after she’d turned sixteen, and he was not at all ashamed to admit that he sometimes fantasized about what he’d have liked to have done to him if he hadn’t already been found dead inside his jail cell a few years ago.

Little abusers were often categorized together with child molesters when it came to inmate vs inmate violence inside prisons. Since almost all CO’s were Big’s themselves they tended to look the other way while “justice” was being served. Maria’s abuser hadn’t lasted more than six weeks before he’d gotten what was coming to him. Unfortunately his most recent victim, the one whose testimony was responsible for putting him away, hadn’t lived long enough to see the headlines in the news. She’d taken her life just days before he’d met his own long overdue fate.

Coulson subconsciously tightened his hold around Ria as he thought about the increasing horrors that poor Little must have been subjected to. She’d been his longest victim by far; almost six years in that bastards clutches. Maria, thank god, had escaped after less then two. Of course back then he wasn’t _physically_ imprisoning his victims, just mentally and emotionally. Coulson couldn’t help but wonder if the man’s switch to locking them up was in response to losing Maria. But then who was he kidding? Of _course_ it was.

“‘m sorry,” Ria whispered, reaching up and touching Coulson’s damp cheek with her fingertips.

The contact more so than the apology snapped him out of his thoughts and he quickly took the girl’s hand in his and pressed half a dozen kisses to her palm. “You don’t even know what’s going on inside my head so why are you sorry? These could be happy tears because I’m getting to spend time with my favorite girl in the whole wide world.” It was a shot in the dark whether Ria would believe him or not, but he had to say something to try and salvage the moment. The last thing he wanted was for Ria to start crying because she thought he was sad.

“Ugh, are you guys _trying_ to get me to drop? You know I don’t like being left out of sappy, tearful moments,” Natasha interrupted petulantly.

Coulson didn’t even have to turn around and look at her to know she was crossing her arms over her chest and pouting at them. He also knew she was only acting jealous because she was trying to break up the increasingly sombre mood. Ria, on the other hand, must have really thought the girl was upset because she immediately began to wriggle and twist in his lap, attempting to pull out of his embrace.

He quickly released his hold around her torso all the while attempting to keep his own emotions in check. Ria wasn’t his and probably never would be. The Heartmate link was there of course, always present in the back of his mind, but unless or until he officially bonded with her their metaphysical connection was no different to the ones he shared with Natasha, Clint, and Bobbi. But since Maria and Natasha actually _were_ bonded, when push came to shove Ria would always choose her Aunt Nat over him.

It hurt. It couldn’t _not_ hurt. But it hurt a lot less than it did back when Maria thought no one knew her secret. Back when he’d had to play pretend alongside her. Back when he’d had to suffer in silence while he’d watched his Heartmate force herself to suffer in silence.

“Sorry, Phil,” Natasha spoke up, her voice soft and apologetic. “I didn’t think she would abandon your lap for mine.”

Coulson shrugged his shoulders as he shook his head. “It’s not abandonment, Nat. We both know if Clint were here Bobbi would be sitting with him right now,” he explained, nodding his head past Natasha to where Victoria still sat rocking Bobbi left and right. The two seemed to be off in their own world together and he frowned, realizing they needed to move the debrief along before they lost the point of it entirely.

The meeting had been set up not just to introduce Victoria to the _idea_ of Maria being a Little, but also as a means of meeting her Littleself in person. Under more ideal circumstances they might have opted to take things slower, perhaps having Maria explain her situation to her fellow handler while she wasn’t dropped. Unfortunately a new assignment in the midwest had suddenly been dropped in both his and Barton’s lap and so the Four Bears were about to be split up for an unknown amount of time.

In the grand scheme of things this wasn’t that unusual. The original Three Bears had been dealing with various combinations of being separated since the very beginning of their careers at SHIELD. What had changed was the addition of Ria to the family. What had also changed was the fact that both Maria and himself were now aware of each others status as potential Heartmates. What had changed is that Coulson desperately didn’t want to leave Ria behind.

Of course that decision wasn’t really up to him. As understanding as Fury was about his agents “secret” bonds with each other, he was first and foremost the leader of the greatest intelligence agency in the world. He may not have liked separating Littles from their Bigs for extended periods of time, but he certainly wouldn’t jeopardize world peace over a few broken hearts and some tears.

Which, fair enough. The job always had and always would come first. But Coulson couldn’t help but wonder if Ria would cry when she found out he had left? She most certainly would cry over losing her Big Brother, but he wasn’t connected to her in the way that Barton was. I mean, he was _connected_ to Ria, sure, but they weren’t as close with each other as the Four Bears were. That was partially his own doing, trying to keep the Little at arms length to protect her, but it was also Maria’s choice to not seek him out in return.

The entire situation between the two of them was a giant emotional clusterfuck and Coulson sighed, hoping his upcoming absence wouldn’t make things worse.

“Getting back to the reason for calling this meeting,” he started, clearing his throat as he pulled his chair back beneath the table so he could rest his elbows on its surface. “Victoria, I’m sure you’re aware of the holiday weekend coming up. Director Fury and I were hoping--”

“Wait, hold on, nuh-uh,” Victoria interrupted quickly, the agent’s eyes growing wide as she dug her heels into the carpet to still the motion of her chair. “You’re not dragging me into work on the _one_ holiday I actually have plans. I gave you Christmas. I gave you Valentines Day. The _least_ you can do is give me the Fourth of July!”

Coulson winced, having already been aware of her plans to travel with her family to the Great Wolf Lodge and Waterpark in Williamsburg, Virginia. “We’re not bringing you in, Vick. On the contrary, we’re sending you away. At least, farther than you’d already planned on going. Wisconsin Dells.”

Judging from the sudden narrowing of Victoria’s eyes, Coulson could guess that his friend was already aware there was also a resort location there.

“You’ve been spying on me? Phil, I’m hurt, truly,” Victoria placed a hand over her heart, feigning displeasure.

In reality Coulson knew she was only teasing being upset. They’d known each other for nearly a decade at this point, so what was a little snooping on credit card statements between friends? “Don’t worry, your prior reservation has already been fully refunded. Nick and I will be covering the cost of your new one,” he reassured.

“Before he undoubtedly takes all the credit, I want you to know that it was _my_ idea to upgrade your lodgings to the Great Frontier Loft Condo. Phil here actually believed the seven of you would be able to fit in a regular suite,” Fury spoke up seemingly for the first time since the meeting had begun.

Coulson angled his head so he could shoot his friend and boss a _look._ “The Wolf Den Suite said it could fit six adults,” he countered.

“No, it said it could fit four adults _comfortably,_ with six adults maximum. Which of the Four Bears did you plan on sleeping on the floor, hm?”

“It’s got double beds, Nick. They could have shared.”

“Right, because nothing says ‘relaxing vacation’ like sharing a bed with a screaming, soggy Toddler.”

“Hey! How abouts you come say that to my face, old man!?” Natasha interrupted, sounding less like her adult self and more like a mix between her own Littleself and Bobbi’s.

Coulson swiveled his chair to the right so he could get a look at the girl’s amused face. Once he was satisfied she was only joking around he returned his attention on their boss. “In my defense, I wasn’t even aware that location _had_ condo options until you pointed it out. Most of the other locations you had me look at didn’t.”

“I sincerely hope you spend more time scouting out locations for missions than you do for vacations,” Fury responded back, the corner of his lips quirking upwards as the two stared at each other challengingly. It was all good natured though, this little verbal joust between the two of them.

“Um, excuse me, hello,” Victoria cleared her throat behind him.

Coulson broke eye contact with Nick first, shaking his head in amusement at the victory smirk that spread across his friend’s face. Spinning once more in his chair he cocked his head to the side as he studied his fellow agent’s expression and body language. Victoria looked more uncertain and insecure than she had in years. Ugh, they’d totally bungled this up.

“I had plans with my wife and daughter to spend a relaxing weekend at a location barely three hours away. Now you want me to drag my family on a sixteen hour road trip with four of the most willful and emotionally challenging Littles I know?”

“Hey, Ria’s not emotionally challenging. She’s gonna be a good girl for her Auntie’s Vick and Iz.” Natasha responded as she rubbed the aforementioned Little’s back.

Coulson couldn’t see Ria’s face but judging from her stillness he suspected that she might have already fallen asleep. “Natasha’s right. Ria’s going to be the _least_ of your worries.”

Victoria snorted as she shook her head. “And what about this one? That’s a long trip for her even on a good day.”

Bobbi made an unhappy grunting noise in the back of her throat in agreement.

“We’ve already taken care of your transportation arrangements. Don’t worry, you won’t be driving to Wisconsin.”

“Right, because flying is any better? Have you forgotten what happened the last time we tried shipping Agent Morse via commercial?”

Coulson tried his best to ignore the snort of laughter that erupted from behind him. Fury was never going to let him live that particular fubar’d mission down.

“I’m pretty sure the entire city of Buffalo still remembers what happened,” he replied, his own bemusement clear in his teasing tone.

Bobbi made a second unhappy grunting noise, followed by a lengthy, low groan.

Coulson knew the girl well enough to recognize that she was genuinely upset with their banter and so he cleared his throat and sat up a little straighter in his chair. “I’ll be dropping you off and picking you up via Quinjet. I’ve already arranged for a fully equipped rental van to be parked near to the field I’ll be landing. Your suite, I mean your _condo,_ will also be fully stocked prior to your arrival.” Coulson had felt Fury’s single eye boring into the back of his head when he misspoke.

Victoria seemed only partially relieved to hear this and Coulson honestly couldn’t blame her for her reaction. If they’d had more time they could have asked her first before changing her plans. But the holiday weekend was only two days away and both Barton and himself were scheduled to ship out on their next mission the day after everyone returned from Wisconsin. It would be his first potentially long term mission since Maria had come out about being a Little and Coulson knew for a fact he wouldn’t be able to sleep at night without first knowing there was at least one Big at SHIELD he could trust to look after his Heartmate while he was gone.

Fury didn’t count for this only because he didn’t go on missions. So while Coulson trusted Fury to keep an eye on Maria while she was at HQ, he’d also needed to know that there was someone who could watch her back out in the field as well.

Despite Maria having long since perfected the art of resisting her body’s natural urge to drop when stressed, Coulson had been hoping that having uninterrupted access to a trusted Big would mean she’d continuing choosing to seek one out instead of denying herself what she needed. The last thing he wanted was for the Little to withdraw back into herself during his absence.

“So I really don’t have a say in any of this?” Victoria asked, interrupting Coulson once more from his thoughts.

“Nope, sorry. Your Quinjet leaves Wednesday at thirteen hundred hours. Good luck, Vick. You’re gonna need it.”


	7. Chapter 7

Victoria groaned as she caught a glimpse of the long check in line at the front desk of their resort. She was already crabby from their indirect flight over and the subsequent hour long drive and now they were going to have to wait even longer to be able to relax? “This is totally Phil’s fault for not dropping us off first,” she bemoaned, casting a glance to her right where her wife was standing with their two year old strapped to her chest. 

Okay so technically Elly wasn’t “strapped” to her chest, but was instead perched on a seat that was in turn strapped to Isabelle’s torso. Bobbi jokingly called it a baby saddle, which, while ridiculous in name was actually rather accurate in description. Even though Isabelle was fully capable of holding their daughter on her hip with just one hand, there were times when she needed to use that hand and little Elly was still a bit too young to be able to cling to her mom without assistance. 

Thus the baby saddle was born. The tiny platform was capable of supporting the child on Isabelle’s hip without the need for the girl to grip with her underdeveloped leg muscles. As long as Gabrielle held onto her Mom’s shirt with her little hands she wasn’t going anywhere even if Isabelle bent over or twisted herself around. It was ingenious in its simplicity, really, and Victoria was incredibly thankful they’d actually remembered to pack it for the trip. 

“Stop being such a sour puss. I thought we agreed to both be the fun moms on family trips?” Isabelle reached out and prodded Victoria in the side with her left arm, or at least what she still had of it. 

“So’r pussss,” baby Elly giggled, reaching out with her chubby legs in an attempt to poke Victoria in the side like her Mommy had done. 

Isabelle grinned as she no doubt realized what her daughter was trying to do and she quickly turned her body 90 degrees so the toddler could actually reach her mom with her bare feet. “That’s right Elly-Belle, you tell your Momma to stop being such a sour puss.” 

The two year old giggled as she swatted her mom with the flat of her foot. 

Victoria could already feel her bad mood melting away at the adorable display. How could she possibly stay upset around such cuteness overload? She waited a few moments and then gripped the toddler’s ankle with her hand, bending down and placing half a dozen sloppy kisses against the sole of her foot. 

Gabrielle squealed in surprise, her uncaptured foot coming up to kick playfully at her Momma to try and get her to stop. 

Knowing her daughter was incredibly ticklish, Victoria continued to assault the girl’s foot and toes until the toddler was a laughing, writhing mess. “That’s what you get for calling your Momma a sour puss!” Victoria teased, eventually letting go of her daughter’s ankle and standing up straight so she could place a wet, sloppy kiss to the girl’s cheek. 

“Ahem,” Isabelle cleared her throat, turning her head and presenting her own cheek to her wife. “I do believe I also called you a sour puss,” she grinned, raising one of her eyebrows suggestively. 

Victoria rolled her eyes as she let out an amused laugh. She then leaned over further and pressed an even sloppier kiss on her wife’s cheek. “You’ll have to wait until tonight for your tickles,” she whispered into her lover’s ear before pulling away.

“Eww, gross,” Bobbi’s voice interrupted their moment, the Little quickly brushing past them with her two wheely suitcases dragging along the pavement behind her. “Get a room you two,” the girl added, though judging from the curl of her lips Victoria knew she was only teasing and wasn’t actually upset at their display. 

Despite her distinctly childish remarks Bobbi wasn’t actually dropped right now. In fact, none of the Littles were currently dropped, but that had more to do with official check-in procedures than it did their own desires. 

The Great Wolf Lodge and Waterpark was one of a growing number of hospitality and tourist attractions that were granted a waiver to the otherwise incredibly strict laws about Little discriminiation. It was an official “safety exemption” granted to them by the US government and most equal rights organizations, including the ACLU, agreed that it was necessary despite its arguable unfairness. 

The way Victoria personally saw it, she’d rather Littles be safe in an inherently unsafe situation even if it meant imposing restrictions on when and where they were allowed to drop. In a way it was very similar to how SHIELD operated, except that the potential dangers at an indoor waterpark were quite a bit different to those experienced by Little agents out in the field. 

For the most part the Four Bears had been pretty amenable to the idea that they were going to have to follow a strict set of rules pertaining to their drops. Inside their condo they were free to drop whenever they liked provided there was either an adult or a Big there to chaperone them. 

Unsurprisingly, Clint was the one who’d been the most vocally resistant to these new and unexpected limitations. Since his Littleself was thirteen SHIELD tended to turn a blind eye on him babysitting dropped Littles while also dropped himself. The resort however was adamant it would not be held liable for any injuries or property damage that resulted from unsupervised Littles. Considering the very real likelihood of someone drowning while at a waterpark, disregarding this rule was justifiable grounds for immediate expulsion from the property. 

As much as Victoria tried to be understanding of Clint’s particular set of emotional hang ups, she’d be pissed as all hell if he managed to get her family permanently banned from the popular, multi-property resort. 


	8. Chapter 8

“Come on, the line’s only gonna get worse the longer we stand out here and mope,” Isabelle rationalized, nodding towards the lobby in front of them. The resort was designed to look like giant a log cabin complete with floor to ceiling windows lining the front entrance and main vestibule. 

From where they stood in the parking lot it was apparent at least a dozen families had arrived before them and nearly all of them seemed to have a slew of tiny children running about. It was the perfect recipe for disaster for anyone with social anxiety or sensory issues and Isabelle cringed as she watched Bobbi marching herself right into the line of fire. 

“Hey, you’ve got B’s paperwork with you, right?” she asked, casting a quick glance behind her to see how far back the other three Littles were. Clint was pushing a small luggage cart stacked with a half dozen suitcases and a giant cooler filled with alcohol no doubt. Maria and Nat were lagging behind, both overloaded with military style duffle bags. 

“Um, yeah, I’ve got it, why? You planning on ditching me already?” Victoria asked, her eyes narrowing as she stared across at her wife. 

Isabelle responded with a devilish grin, an idea already forming in her head. “Yep. But I’ll let you pick your poison if it’ll help.”

“Go on,” the off duty agent replied, drawing the short sentence out longer than was necessary to get the point across that she was wary of whatever idea her lover had come up with.

Isabelle wanted to be offended that her wife didn’t trust her, but who was she kidding? In the more than ten years that they’d been together she’d certainly given her best friend and Soulmate more than enough reasons to be suspicious of her spur of the moment schemes. This idea, however, wasn’t one of the ones she should be cautious of. This idea was just  _ practical. _ Divide and conquer, as they say.

“Okay, well, one of us can take the three-- I mean, the  _ four _ bears through the side entrance so as to avoid the shitshow up ahead. The other can do the official checking in and registration,” Isabelle offered up, honestly believing the two options were comparable in difficulty and potential frustration. The four bears may not have been dropped but she knew from previous experience that they could be just willful as adults as they were as kids. 

Well, she couldn’t quite say that about Maria just yet, but three out of four troublemakers was more than enough to give even the calmest of Bigs a headache. 

“Ugh, fine. I’ll take check-in, you take the bears. I get the baby though,” Victoria bargained as she reached out for the toddler currently cuddled against Isabelle’s side. 

Isabelle wasn’t the least bit surprised at which option her lover chose, but she  _ was _ kind of surprised that she wanted to take Gabrielle along with her. Historically, one on one time with her daughter wasn’t something her wife prioritized. She  _ had _ been doing a lot better in that department the last few months though, so she was more than happy to continue giving her wife the chance to prove herself as a mother. Plus Elly absolutely  _ adored _ her Momma these days and was delighted whenever she could spend time with her. 

“Fine, I  _ guess _ you can have the cuddle monster for a while,” Isabelle sighed, acting as if she were making a huge concession in handing over the girl. “I just hope a situation doesn’t crop up where I’ll have needed her extra set of hands. Would be a shame if my shoelaces became untied and I tripped and cracked my head open on the sidewalk.”

Victoria simply rolled her eyes as she plucked the two year old from the saddle over Isabelle’s hip. “You are quite capable of tying your shoes one handed.”

Isabelle couldn’t really argue with that so she remained quiet as she watched Victoria situate the girl on her own hip, the movements a lot less awkward and uncertain as they used to be. The fact that Elly immediately wrapped her arms around her Momma’s neck and buried her face against her shoulder likely helping to increase her confidence. 

There was a time, not that long ago really, when their daughter would scream and cry whenever Victoria would try and pick her up or take her somewhere she could no longer see her other mom. Isabelle honestly wasn’t sure who’s heart broke more when the girl would do that: her’s or her wife’s. 

Oblivious or simply indifferent to her parent’s discussion, Gabrielle suddenly began rubbing her nose rather fervently on Victoria’s shirt. 

Isabelle started to reach into her pocket to produce a tissue but her wife already had one out and was attempting to slip it between the girl’s face and her clothing. 

“Hey booger, mind not using Momma’s shirt as a snot rag?” Victoria laughed, tickling her daughter’s cheek when the girl finally noticed the tissue and began to use that instead.  

Isabelle couldn't help but roll her eyes at the ridiculous display. Even though the girl had two functioning hands she tended not to let go with either of them while she was being held and instead used her feet to poke and prod at things when she felt like it. Her wife firmly believed that the girl’s atypical behavior had to do with the fact that before the creation of the baby saddle Isabelle was never able to use her own hand while she was carrying her around. Monkey see, monkey do, and so forth. 

“You two are gonna give me a toothache,” Isabelle responded with an amused grin, instinctively reaching out and tugging the back of Gabrielle’s shirt down so it wasn’t riding up and exposing her skin so much. The toddler’s hair wasn’t the only thing that was abnormally white. 

“Aww, you love it,” Victoria insisted back, moving closer so they could peck each other on the lips. 

Isabelle did love it and instead of pulling away she pressed her forehead against her wife’s for a few seconds, enjoying the innocent contact just as much as she did the kiss. Eventually though she pulled back, but not before pressing a slew of kisses to the top of her daughter’s head.

As predicted Gabrielle began laughing and squirming, attempting to get away from the “assault”.

Isabelle laughed at her daughter’s over exaggerated reaction. She wished she could stay a bit longer but her other “daughter” was already halfway up the steps to the front lobby. If Bobbi made it inside then her plan would no longer be necessary since the damage would potentially already be done. 

“Ring me when you’ve got the keycards,” she told her wife before moving in and stealing one last kiss from her. This time instead of lingering afterwards she broke away and began to make her way quickly towards the front of the building, hoping she could still intercept Bobbi in time. 


	9. Chapter 9

“Oi, Bam-Bam, hang a right will ya?!”

Bobbi faltered in her ascent, her foot now hovering over the last step leading into the lobby of the resort. She sighed, closing her eyes a moment at the no doubt unintentional nickname and then slowly set her foot back on solid ground. It didn’t bother her quite as much these days when Izzy accidentally called her that. She honestly couldn’t fault the Big for picking up on the moniker seeing as the Little who’d come up with it was Isabelle’s own Heartmate. 

Truthfully, Bobbi much preferred Lance Hunter referring to her as that instead of the assortment of  _ other _ names he no doubt had for her. Their breakup nearly a decade ago had been anything but amicable so it was honestly the cruelest trick of fate that they’d ended up Heartmates to a Soulmate couple. At least Hunter wouldn’t be joining them for the weekend, though Bobbi was absolutely certain she’d be hearing his annoying, nasally voice over a video chat at some point before their vacation was over. 

“I said turn right! You ain’t got your ears in so I know you can hear me!”

Bobbi pushed away her less than pleasant thoughts as the sound of sandals slapping against the pavement grew steadily louder, then finally turned around when she could also hear the Big’s wheezing gasps for breath. “Seriously Iz? You have a  _ toddler. _ There’s no way you’re that out of shape after such a short sprint,” she snorted, eyeing her friend’s hunched over and struggling form just a few feet away.

Isabelle had stopped at the bottom of the steps, clearly winded from the exertion of trying to catch up to Bobbi. “Yeah, a toddler with a skin condition. She doesn’t have much room to run around indoors,” the woman replied between gasps for breath. 

Bobbi rolled her eyes as she slowly walked back down the steps towards her friend. Her rolling suitcase made a  _ thud-thud-thud _ noise as the plastic wheels bounced against the concrete behind her. “You’re forgetting I’ve babysat your little hellspawn,” she countered casually, as if the nickname for the two year old wasn’t the least bit offensive; which it really wasn’t considering Isabelle herself often called the child that. “Elly’s just as fast indoors as other kids are outdoors. You’ve just grown lazy and out of shape in your old age.”

“Excuse me, in my  _ what?” _ Isabelle asked incredulously, her eyes growing comically wide as she stared across at Bobbi. 

“Oh you heard me. Or did you? Should I  _ speak up?” _ Bobbi raised her voice for that last part, honestly impressed with her self restraint that she hadn’t started laughing yet. This type of banter was a thing her and Izzy did, though typically only when they were in the comfort and familiarity of one of their homes. And usually only when there was alcohol and shitty action movies involved. 

“Them’s fighting words, B,” Isabelle responded, standing up straighter and raising her arms in a defensive posture. 

Even though the Big was missing half a limb Bobbi knew she was still quite capable of holding her own in a fight, though mainly because she fought dirty. But then again so did she, so it all worked out in the end. Usually.

“We’re not throwing down in the parking lot, Iz,” Bobbi laughed, rolling her eyes once again as she descended the last step. Once her suitcase landed next to her she made an abrupt left hand turn, easily spotting the alternate entrance to the resort at the far end of the building. “I’d suggest racing you to the door but Victoria would absolutely  _ kill me _ if you overexerted yourself and passed out in the parking lot.” 

Grinning to herself at the overdramatic and clearly fake outrage noises coming from the Big behind her, Bobbi started to walk across the parking lot towards the door. 

*****

Once inside the building she made a beeline for a comfortable looking bench along one of the walls of the respectably sized entry room. It wasn’t anywhere near as grand as the main lobby would have been but it was certainly quieter and a lot less crowded. Even though her sensory issues hadn’t really been an issue for her that morning she still appreciated Isabelle’s thoughtfulness in directing her away from a potentially triggering situation. 

Commercialized resorts were right up there with airports on her list of places to avoid if at all possible. Her family’s one and only trip to Disney World a few years ago had been a disaster from the get go. The park’s general overcrowdedness as well as the cacophony of screaming, excited children and Littles had been too much for her easily overstimulated brain. 

She hadn’t wanted to ruin the trip for her siblings though and had simply dealt with it the only way she knew how: shutting everything down inside of her head and going completely numb to outside stimulation. It was a trick she’d learned from Agent Weaver back when she’d still been a student at the Academy, and the mastering of that particular skill had been a prerequisite for her eventual transfer from Sci-Tech to Operations. 

Shutting down her brain’s ability to absorb specific external stimulation was the only way she was able to go on missions. Unfortunately it wasn’t a skill she was capable of utilizing during her normal day to day existence. Shutting down parts of her mind was relatively easy, but opening them back up again was extremely difficult and was the reason she often “freaked out” immediately after extraction. 

She’d almost brought down her teams quinjet on two separate occasions before SHIELD had forced her to choose between permanently retiring from field missions, or to consenting to being drugged if or when her behavior escalated that far. Bobbi was actually rather proud of herself that in the four years since she’d begrudgingly agreed to her new terms of employment she hadn’t once needed to be knocked unconscious during a mission. Though the fact that she outright refused to go on missions these days without at least one of her siblings or her Heartmate with her had a lot to do with it. 

“Heeeeyy, you could have at least held the door for your elderly, disabled step-mother,” a no longer out of breath Isabelle joked as she suddenly appeared and plopped down on the bench next to Bobbi. 

The weathered wood beneath them creaked and groaned with the added weight, causing Bobbi to giggle under her breath at the comparison that sprang to mind. “Sounds like  _ you _ when you try to get up after sitting for too long.”

“Alright, alright, I’m old, I get it. I can still kick your ass though,” Isabelle responded with a still playfully sounding huff. She was sitting to the left of Bobbi so was able to wrap her good arm around her shoulders and pull her into an affectionate hug. 

Bobbi hummed in acknowledgment of that fact and rested her cheek on the Big’s shoulder, turning her body slightly so it was easier for her to mold herself against Isabelle’s side. If she weren’t actively avoiding a drop she would have climbed into the Big’s lap for a proper cuddle. Isabelle gave the  _ best _ cuddles when she was feeling stressed or under the weather. 

Not that she was feeling either of those things right now, mind you, but the Big’s unwaveringly grounding presence was enjoyable just the same.

“I guess the others went with Vick to the main entrance,” Bobbi murmured after a few moments of silence. She lifted her head off her friend’s shoulder just long enough to be able to look towards the glass door they’d both entered from. 

“Seems like it. Kinda ruins the bargain I’d made with V but oh well,” Isabelle responded, shrugging the shoulder Bobbi wasn’t resting her head on. “She’s been through worse. She can handle check-in  _ and _ your siblings.”

“She’s got El with her, she’ll be fine,” Bobbi agreed. “And Maria’s there too. You don’t really know her yet but trust me when I say she’s still very much capable of acting like a Big. Nat’s been trying to condition her out of reverting to that persona when they go out in public but half a lifetime of hiding who you are is a hard habit to break.”

Isabelle made a noise in the back of her throat in what sounded like agreement. “Alright, but this trip is  _ supposed _ to be about her Littleself learning to trust Victoria, so hopefully we’ll be seeing that side of her at some point.”

Bobbi pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she thought about what the next few weeks would be like if things didn’t work out as planned. In a few days Coulson was leaving for a potentially long term assignment at a SHIELD facility in the midwest. This meant little Ria wouldn’t have easy access to a Big she trusted if something were to happen to her. 

Fury didn’t count since there was no guarantee that he'd be available should she find herself dropped and in need of him. Even though he rarely went out into the field himself these days he always seemed to be tied up with some mission or other. At least Agent Hand had the ability to delegate or transfer over her current responsibilities to other agents should she need to leave a mission suddenly. It wasn’t an ideal situation for any Big handler to have to choose between the agents in their care and their own Little, but it happened often enough at SHIELD that no one even blinked an eye anymore. 

“We’ll definitely be seeing her. This entire building is basically one gigantic playground. Ria’s  _ six _ and has been starved for this type of fun all her life. She’ll give in eventually and come play with us, you’ll see,” Bobbi explained, nodding her head with unwavering assurance. “I give her till morning at the latest. Once she sees the rest of us having fun she’ll drop.”

 


	10. Chapter 10

Contrary to Bobbi’s assertion, the next morning the only Little that was dropped was Bobbi herself. Victoria had been trying for the last few minutes to get the girl to put on the mandatory shirt she needed to wear to be able to swim at the resort. All Littles needed to wear resort provided shirts when they were dropped in order to signal their current mental status to the lifeguards on duty. It was a safety protocol that all Little visitors needed to abide by, even ones as stubborn and relentless as Bobbi. 

The trouble wasn’t with having to wear a shirt over her bathing suit in general, but the fact that her shirt was _yellow._ In addition to their name, room number, and Little age written on the shirt, the shirts themselves were color coded with respect to the Little’s abilities in and around water. Green meant the Little was capable of swimming and thus faced no restrictions on the rides. Red meant they couldn’t swim and therefor were limited to the types of rides and pools they could play in. Blue meant they were under two years old and as such had to remain in the kiddie swim area.

Yellow, as it typically did, meant _caution._ Yellow meant the Little had some form of impairment or disability that may or may not affect their ability to swim depending on the situation and their current mental or physical state. Yellow wasn’t red, necessarily, but it also wasn’t green. Little’s wearing yellow had all the freedoms of those wearing green, but with those freedoms came extra surveillance and scrutiny by the lifeguards. 

Yellows were watched more closely than any of the other colors since their ability to swim had the potential to fluctuate from moment to moment. Blue babies stayed where babies were safe. Red non swimmers were restricted to pools where they could always touch the bottom when standing. But yellows? Yellows could go anywhere they wanted, even places they maybe shouldn’t be at that specific moment in time.

Bobbi most definitely did _not_ want to wear yellow and Victoria felt her heart breaking inside of her chest as she continued to try and reason with the nearly hysterical girl. 

“Bobbi, honey, you can’t cry your way out of this. I’m sorry, it’s the rules of the waterpark. If you want to go swimming you have to wear the shirt,” Victoria explained once more. She was currently kneeling in the corner of the room while her sobbing Little stood in front of her, the girl’s back pressed firmly into the seam of the two walls. They’d been like this for almost five minutes now and Victoria could already see warning signs that Bobbi was working herself up into an episode. 

“No-o-o-oo-oo--” Bobbi protested around her continued sobs. She was squeezing and relaxing her hands at her sides, repeating the motions over and over as her distress continued to build. 

Victoria sighed and reached for her Little’s hands, not at all surprised when the girl yanked them away and shoved them up behind her back between herself and the wall. “Sweetheart, there are other options here. We don’t _have_ to go swimming right now. We could always go find another activity to do together while we wait for everyone else to wake up. I know you really wanted to make use of the special quieter swim time but we can always try again during the regular Little swim time. Your siblings will be able to swim then too so maybe you’ll feel a bit better with them around?”

Bobbi shook her head adamantly, her tears still streaming down her face as she cried. “Want… swim… no-o-o-ow…” she bemoaned, her face starting to turn white from how hard she had it scrunched up. 

Victoria closed her eyes a moment. She was honestly torn for what to do. Normally she would have already taken the Little out of the situation, effectively making the decision for her once it was clear she wasn’t going to calm down. She didn’t want to do that here though. This was an incredibly rare opportunity to get to swim in the park before it officially opened to the rest of the visitors. It was one of the perks offered to those wearing yellow shirts. The special window was only open for an hour though and they were quickly running out of time to register to take advantage of it. 

Glancing around the room at the other dozen or so yellow clad Littles and their respective caretakers, Victoria suddenly had a thought. Reaching into her bag she fished out her phone and quickly dialed her wife. Unsurprisingly, it took about four rings before Isabelle finally answered. It _was_ half past seven in the morning after all. 

“Mm, yeah? V? ‘Sup?” the Big’s voice responded over the phone followed by a deep and lengthy yawn. 

Victoria could hear the mattress creaking beneath her wife as she no doubt pulled herself into a sitting position on the bed. Even though their room was on the opposite side of the rental condo from the Four Bear’s enormous double ensuite, Isabelle’s voice was still hushed since their daughter was most likely still fast asleep next to her. 

“I’m with Bobbi at the registration for the early swim but she’s having a hard time,” Victoria explained, knowing her wife would understand what she meant by that. Plus the Little’s sobs were still loud enough they could probably be heard over the phone. 

“Do you know what set her off?” 

Victoria rubbed her forehead absently at the question. “She wants to swim but she doesn’t want to wear the yellow shirt,” she told her, lifting her eyes back up to Bobbi’s face to see how she was doing. The Little’s eyes were clenched shut and at some point she’d begun to knock the back of her head against the wall behind her. Standing up quickly Victoria reached out and placed her hand between the girl’s head and the hard surface. “I don’t think she likes what the color signifies. I’d thought being here with other Littles like herself would help but I think it’s actually making it worse. I’m not sure what to do here, Iz. Should I bring her back up to the room or keep trying to calm her down?”

There was a few seconds of silence on the other end of the line before Isabelle finally responded, “Give me ten minute to get dressed and I’ll meet you both down there. I’ve got an idea.” 

Victoria frowned as the phone call suddenly disconnected. She’d really only called her wife looking for verbal support and maybe some suggestions, not to ask her to come down to the waterpark with them. She knew there was no point in calling her back however since Isabelle was just as stubborn as Bobbi once she had an idea in her head. Hopefully whichever bear she woke up to watch Gabrielle in their absence wouldn’t be too grumpy about it, and hopefully whatever idea she had to get Bobbi to wear the shirt would work. Little Bobbi really loved to swim and it would be a shame if she missed out on the opportunity to do so. 


	11. Chapter 11

It took Isabelle a little longer than ten minutes to get downstairs but only because most of her time had been spent waking up and convincing Clint to babysit Gabrielle for her. Once he’d found out the reason for her needing to leave the condo he’d insisted on himself going to see Bobbi instead. She was his Soulmate after all and if she were in distress then he wanted to be there for her. 

Isabelle could definitely respect that sentiment. If Victoria had been the one to be upset she’d have wanted to go to her too. Only this situation was different to that. Bobbi was dropped, which meant Clint wasn’t technically her Soulmate in that moment and this wasn’t something the girl’s “big brother” could help her with. At least not as effectively as a Big could since this was biologically what they were designed to do.

Eventually he relented and agreed to stay in the condo and watch the still sleeping toddler. Isabelle had promised him that she would call immediately if neither herself nor Victoria could calm Bobbi down, but she didn’t think that would end up being the case. She had an idea and was confident it would work.

Walking into the registration room off to the side of the entrance to the waterpark, Isabelle quickly spotted her loved ones in the far corner. Bobbi’s body was squashed against the wall but her head was resting on Victoria’s shoulder. She was still crying, though not as hysterically as she’d been doing earlier while Isabelle had been on the phone. 

Instead of walking directly towards them she hung a left and made her way towards the registration table. She kept her eyes off the stack of yellow shirts and instead focused her attention on the two resort employees sitting behind them. The girl on the left looked to be about Natasha’s age while the boy on the right barely passed for 18. The confrontationally bored look on his face made her wonder if this was his first job ever. He certainly wasn’t giving off “understanding and helpful” vibes which Isabelle started to suspect might be part of what was bothering Bobbi.

Reigning in her already fierce overprotectiveness, she opted to try and address the girl on the left instead of the boy. “Hi. I’m uh-- I’m here to pick up my shirt,” she explained, nodding her head towards the pile of folded yellow shirts. 

The girl whose nametag read “Amber” cocked her head to the side as she studied Isabelle for a moment. “Come again?” she asked, clearly confused by the request. Which, fair enough. 

“The shirt is a requirement for early swim, yes?” Isabelle asked, tilting her own head to the side to mirror the girl’s previous action. 

“Um, yeah, but only for--”

“They’re for dropped Little’s only,  _ ma’am,” _ the boy interrupted, an amused smirk spreading across his face as he stared challengingly up at her. “And only ones that are ‘special’.” He emphasised that last word with honest to god air quotes. Who even did that anymore?

Isabelle felt her hackles rise at the smugness visible on the teenager’s face. She hated impertinent little shits like him and had half a mind to teach him some manners. Maybe being fired from his first job would teach him to respect not just Bigs but other Littles as well? He was clearly not going to get very far in life with an attitude like that.

“Right...” Isabelle began, closing her eyes for a moment to center herself. She couldn’t let herself lose it on the boy even if he so very much deserved it. She was there to help Bobbi feel comfortable and confident enough to wear the yellow shirt so she could go swimming. That was her goal and she had to keep focused on that. 

“You see that little girl in the corner over there sobbing her heart out?” Isabelle finally started again, opening her eyes and pointing towards where her family stood. “That’s my  _ kid, _ you understand?”

The boy didn’t even bother glancing towards the two before shaking his head and grabbing a clipboard from the table in front of him. “Is your name  _ also _ Victoria Hand? Because that’s who we’ve got registered as that girl’s Big and the woman already over there with her said that that was  _ her _ name.”

Isabelle actually felt laughter bubble up inside her throat at the kids response. She held it back though and instead counted to five inside of her head. “Alright, my  _ wife’s _ kid. We didn’t put both of our names on the form since it didn’t give us the option to. She may not be my Heartmate but I  _ am _ her mother.” She was rapidly losing the last bit of restraint she had to not get up in the kid’s face and call him on his bullshit. 

“It’s okay, you don’t have to be on the form to participate in early swim with her. We understand that sometimes a Little needs more than one Caretaker to feel safe in the water,” Amber replied reasonably. 

“Good to know,” Isabelle responded back, relaxing a slight bit. She had a goal here and had to keep focused on that. “Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, may I please have a yellow shirt so I can swim with my daughter?”

The boy made an amused snickering noise under his breath and then crossed his arms over his chest. “We already told you, these shirts are only for  _ dropped _ Littles with  _ documented _ problems. We can’t just give them out to any Tom, Dick, and Sally who claims they need one. Even if you  _ were _ Little and dropped, without paperwork our hands are tied.”

Isabelle narrowed her eyes at the way the boy’s voice pitched upwards on the tied hands comment. He was clearly trying to conceal the fact that he was internally laughing at her, which,  _ hell _ no. Moving closer so her thighs brushed against the front of the table she leaned forward and waved the stub of her left arm in the air in front of his face. “Are you seriously going to sit there and tell me I need a doctors note to prove I’m missing my fucking arm?”

The boy opened his mouth to fire back at her but before he could Amber reached out and gripped him tightly on the shoulder.  _ “Stop it,  _ Zach. Look, Miss…” 

“Isabelle Hartley.”

“Miss Hartley. I apologize for my brother’s rude behavior. He’s acting like this because our mom yelled at him this morning when he didn’t want to wake up to come to work,” Amber explained with clear frustration in her voice. 

Isabelle watched with growing interest as Zach huffed angrily at his sister. “Wait a second, this cretin’s your brother? My sincere condolences to you and your family,” she told the girl, smirking herself at the affronted noises the boy was now making. 

“Hey! You can’t talk to me like that!”

“I wasn’t talking  _ to _ you, I was talking  _ about _ you, there’s a difference.”

“Do you even know who I am?? My mom’s the manager here! She can kick you guys out if I--”

“No she can’t, she’s a shift manager in the kitchen, not the resort manager. Seriously, just ignore everything that comes out of his mouth, that’s what the rest of us do,” Amber interrupted, rolling her eyes at her brother’s continued faux outrage. “Actually, Zach, why don’t you just go take your break early? I’ll finish up here by myself.”

Zach was still red in the face as he huffed impotently. It was clear he understood he had no real authority here and so he eventually pushed his chair back and got to his feet. “Whatever,” he spat at his sister before storming around the table and out of the room.

Isabelle stood there for a few moments, honestly a bit surprised at how quickly and severely that escalated. Glancing around the room she could see some of the other Caretakers staring at her and Amber, their Littles huddled close to them in confusion or fright. Well shit, this was definitely not what she’d had planned when she’d offered to come downstairs. Hoping it was still possible to salvage the situation, she returned her attention to Amber. 

“So... about the shirt?”

*****

Fifteen minutes later Isabelle found herself seated in one of the holes of a giant figure 8 shaped float, her backside and ankles beneath the cool water while the rest of her still remained dry above it. Victoria was seated in the hole next to her, the Big’s hands and feet moving through the water in an attempt to direct their path around the Lazy River. 

“You sure you don’t want your own float?” Isabelle asked the Little curled up in her lap. 

Bobbi shook her head as best she could without lifting it off of Isabelle’s chest. Her eyes were closed and her expression relaxed. She almost looked like she were on the verge of falling asleep which was rather surprising considering how upset she’d been not that long ago. 

“She’s too exhausted to swim right now. All that crying really took it out of her,” Victoria explained quietly, her hands moving through the water faster now as their float began to approach a waterfall element. Only one side of the bridge actually had the waterfall turned on and the Big was attempting to steer them towards the dry side. 

“That’s alright. Amber said I could keep the shirt as long as I only wearing it during early swim. We can always try this again tomorrow,” Isabelle replied, smiling at the tired but pleased whimpering noise Bobbi made at the suggestion. She tucked her arm more firmly around the Little’s waist and placed a kiss to the top of her head. 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay fair warning guys, this chapter has some verbal abuse by a Big towards a non-dropped Little (none of our characters). Also the use of the “r” word (but again, not towards the main characters). Next chapter will follow up right after this one.

The resort’s inhouse restaurant was packed by the time Maria and Natasha made their way downstairs looking for something to eat. It was just past noon on their first full day there and despite their better judgement they’d thought it would be fun to stick around onsite to eat instead of going into town with the rest of their group. Five steps into the craziness that was The Lodge Woodfire Grill they’d begrudgingly come to the realisation that they’d made a huge mistake.

“Well this sucks,” Maria groaned as she sat squished shoulder to shoulder between Natasha and some strange woman on the narrow bench lining the restaurants waiting area. Even though the stranger was clearly a Big she had the least welcoming aura that Maria had ever experienced. Even _he_ hadn’t felt this off putting to her and that was saying a whole helluva lot. At least the woman’s stiflingly unpleasant presence was keeping the urge to drop at bay. 

Normally when faced with an uncomfortable situation like this she’d either turn around and leave, or drop and focus all of her attention on whichever Caretaker she was with. Even though Auntie Nat wasn’t technically a “Caretaker” Caretaker she was still better at soothing her anxiety and stress than most Big’s in her life. Okay, so maybe not Coulson. Coulson was still the Best Big Ever, but Auntie Nat was definitely preferable to Uncle Fury.

Not that Little Ria disliked Uncle Fury. On the contrary, she actually _loved_ being around him, it’s just that he wasn’t very good at picking up on her minute changes in emotions. He’d certainly kept her safe, well fed, and entertained the handful of times he’d looked after her, but she’d honestly trade all of that for a single hug from Uncle Phil whenever she was feeling scared or sad. 

She wasn’t currently scared or sad but she definitely wouldn’t have said no to a reassurance hug from her fellow Handler if he’d been with them right now. 

Which was kind of the whole reason for this trip, wasn’t it? To break her of that desire? Or at least to temporarily transfer that emotional dependence onto Agent Hand? Maria closed her eyes as she chuckled low in her throat. From what she’d seen and felt so far being around the Big and her family she honestly believed she’d have an easier time connecting with Hand’s wife than the SHIELD agent herself. 

“What’s so funny?” Natasha whispered next to her, the girl’s body leaning into hers a bit more firmly.

Maria whined and pushed back against Natasha’s shoulder, not wanting to be pressed any further into the stranger on her other side. “Nothing, just thinking about Belmopan,” she lied, hoping her Soulmate would understand the reference.

Her recent mission in the capital city of Belize had been a clusterfuck of previously unexperienced proportions. Maria honestly believed she deserved a medal for the sheer amount of dumbfuckery she’d had to deal with in keeping the Strike Team alive and in one piece. Agent Rumlow was usually one of SHIELD’s top agents, mainly for his ability to follow any order you gave him without question, but on more than one occasion during that mission she’d seriously considered confiscating his weapons and sending him to the “naughty corner” to cool down. 

She hadn’t done so of course. She may have been the highest ranking agent on that mission but she hadn’t been his direct supervisor. In the end Agent Sitwell had been the one to experience the brunt of her frustration and anger. Once the mission objective had been reached, albeit in the most shittastic way imaginable, she hadn't just torn him a new one verbally but had actually made _him_ sit in the naughty corner on the Quinjet back to HQ.

The ridiculousness of the forty year old Big sitting quietly in “time out” for the entire six hour flight was at least amusing enough to take Maria’s mind off of her current discomfort. She almost had half a mind to pull up the logged footage on her phone to show Natasha. She wouldn’t though, but only because they were in public and it wouldn’t take much for the Big on her right to lean over and see what they were watching. 

“While I don’t disagree that Belmopan must have been amusing to you, I know that’s not what you were laughing at. Unless you’re implying that you want to do what you did to a certain someone to _another_ certain someone?” Natasha asked, tilting her head just slightly in the direction of the Big on Maria’s other side.

Maria snorted under her breath. She should have known that her Soulmate would be able to pick up on her discomfort and then be able to discern who it was directed at. It’s not even that the Big next to her was _doing_ anything blatantly distressing, but their presence right up against her very much felt like an oppressive hand wrapped tightly around her throat. 

 _Switch seats?_ Natasha asked using their newly learned sign language. 

Bobbi’s latest obsession was learning every single way there was to communicate nonverbally, partially because it was in her job description to be fluent in as many languages as possible, but mostly because Cooper still hadn’t begun speaking and Laura had practically begged her to come up with a way to help her communicate with her son. 

Pidgin Signed English had been easy enough for their group to learn alongside Bobbi, though the language expert hadn’t stopped at just that one form and had continued on until she’d had _nine_ distinct types of sign language in her arsenal. 

Last Maria had heard Cooper was responding the best to Chinese Sign Language, which understandably frustrated his mother since it was one of the more difficult ones to learn, though that fact hadn’t stopped the Big from enrolling in every single online program she could find that would help her formulate a better grasp of the underlying spoken language. 

It was admirable, though no doubt exhausting for the young mother, but Maria knew without a doubt that all of Laura’s hard work would eventually pay off in the end. 

 _Switch seats?_ Natasha asked again, slowing down the motions of her hands this time. 

Maria rolled her eyes as she shook her head. She wasn’t going to let some strange Big’s bad juju get to her. Not if she could help it.

Suddenly the shrill sound of a cell phone going off interrupted their silent conversation. It was the Big’s phone and Maria winced imperceptibly as the woman answered the call. 

“About fucking time! Is my table ready?” the woman practically shouted into the phone. “What?! I’ve already been waiting _twenty minutes!_ Sarah you’re the fucking manager of the restaurant, kick someone out, I don’t care! What? Yes I know it’s a holiday week and you’re extremely busy but you promised me lunch if I interrupted my day to pick up your retard son and bring him to his therapy appointment!”

Maria reached out and gripped Natasha’s wrist, shaking her head minutely to try and stem whatever reaction the girl was about to have. She herself wanted to explode on the woman but it really wasn’t any of their business. They couldn’t make a scene just because this Big was being an asshole to someone over the phone. 

“I don’t want to hear your excuses Sarah! You can’t keep making promises and then breaking them! This is why your husband divorced you! You only ever think about yourself and what’s convenient for you! I honestly don’t know why I put up with you anymore. I should have left when Frank left. He was a much better Little than you’ve ever been. You work in a fucking kitchen and can’t even make sure your Big has their lunch on time!”

“Hill, table for two?” 

Maria almost missed the waiter’s summons she was too focused on keeping Natasha from unloading on the Big. Everyone in the waiting area was staring in their direction and the Big had actually gone silent for a moment, almost as if to see how Maria would respond. Loosening her grip on Natasha’s wrist she cleared her throat and shook her head at the waiter. 

“I think there’s been a mistake. This woman next to us was here before us. That should be her table, not ours,” she explained, casting a sideways glance at her soulmate to make sure she’d play along.

“Um, are you sure?” the waiter asked, clearing his throat and shifting his gaze nervously towards the Big. 

“Yep, I’m sure,” Maria insisted, nodding her head for good measure. 

“Um, alright. If you’ll follow me this way ma’am,” the waiter responded, directing his words at the Big now. 

“Never mind Sarah, they’ve finally called my table,” the woman spoke into her phone one last time before hanging up. “Fucking finally. I’ve been waiting almost an _hour,”_ she huffed as she got to her feet. She didn’t even glance in Maria or Natasha’s direction as she followed the waiter out of the room and into the restaurant. 

“Still think this was like Belmopan?” Natasha asked after a few moments, a hint of amusement but also admiration in her voice.

Maria smirked, shaking her head. “You know how I feel about corporal punishment but that woman was in _serious_ need of a spanking.”

“Oh god, please don’t put that image in my head,” Natasha laughed as her body shivered in no doubt disgust. “But seriously, that was really nice of you to give her our table.”

Maria shrugged halfheartedly. “Didn’t really do it for her benefit but for everyone else’s,” she explained, gesturing around the room at the rest of the guests still waiting for a table. “That poor waiter though,” she shook her head, trying to stifle a laugh. “Remind me to slip him a twenty if we see him again. You know that screeching pterodactyl of a woman isn’t going to tip him worth shit.”

When Natasha didn’t respond back for a few moments Maria frowned and turned in her seat. “What?” she asked, cocking her head to the side as she studied her lover’s suddenly serious face.

Natasha shook her head, her expression quickly shifting to one of adoration now. “Nothing. Just… don’t ever change, okay?” She punctuated her statement by leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Maria’s lips. 

Maria was a little surprised at the sudden public display of affection but didn’t pull out of the kiss. Instead she kissed back, curling her body affectionately into her girlfriend as a familiar warmth began spreading through her chest. It wasn’t sexual in the least, but was more a peaceful contentment at being so closely connected to her Soulmate. 

“Um hi, sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt,” a new voice suddenly did just that causing Maria to jerk away from the kiss, her hand instinctively traveling to the waistband of her shorts. She wasn’t carrying her sidearm since the resort was a gun-free zone but old habits died hard.

“Hi, again, I’m so sorry to interrupt but I only have a few seconds before I have to get back into the kitchen. My name’s Sarah and I manage the restaurant here. One of my waiters just informed me of what you two did for that uh, that other guest and I just wanted to come out here and thank you both personally.”

Maria felt her eyebrows fly up to her hairline as she took in the woman’s frazzled yet clearly grateful expression. So this was Sarah? The poor Little looked mentally and physically exhausted and it took all of her self restraint to not ask the less than appropriate questions raging on her mind. Was she okay? Was she being abused? Did she need their help? As much as Maria felt for other Little’s in positions similar to the one she’d been in herself she knew she couldn’t just go around tossing out accusations like that. Not without definitive proof, at least. 

Working for the country’s foremost intelligence agency meant her word had more sway than most in law enforcement and as such she couldn’t risk bringing extreme scrutiny down upon herself or SHIELD by accidentally backing a false accusation. Good intentions didn’t excuse innocent people winding up in jail, _especially_ since those labeled as “Little abusers” often wound up dead not long after arriving there. 

“Um, yeah, it’s fine. That woman seemed like she needed that table more than us,” Maria explained carefully. “We can wait until the next one is free, it’s no problem, really.”

Sarah shook her head quickly as she scrambled to pull a tiny spiral notebook from her back pocket. “No, no, you two shouldn’t have to wait like that. Have you guys looked at the menu yet? Do you know what you wanted to order? Are you two staying here on site? If you are I can have your meal brought up to your room, free of charge. In fact your entire meal will be free of charge. Really, I can’t thank you enough for what you did.”

Maria hadn’t actually looked over the menu all that much yet and she felt her heartrate begin to increase at suddenly having to make a decision like this on the spot. 

Natasha seemed to sense her rising panic and she reached out and grasped Maria’s hand tightly in her own. “That is a very generous offer, thank you. We’re in suite 302. Maria here wanted the WFG burger, medium rare, no tomatoes but with extra pickles. I’ll have the Buffalo Chicken Flatbread but without the blue-cheese crumbles if at all possible. French fries for both of our sides instead of the chips. No drinks since we’ve already got plenty of that upstairs. My names Natasha, by the way.” 

Maria watched as Sarah scribbled furiously on her little notepad. She had no idea when Natasha had found the time to read and memorize the menu but she was even more impressed that her girlfriend seemed to know exactly what she felt like eating. Then again whenever she was stressed or felt put on the spot to make a decision regarding food she _always_ defaulted to the house burger. It was a comfort food of hers when eating out since a restaurant would have to be seriously hard pressed to fuck up a _hamburger_. 

“Okay, I think I’ve got it all. I’ll have someone bring it up to room 302 when it’s done. It’ll be maybe fifteen minutes? Twenty tops? How does that sound?”

“That sounds great. Thank you again, we really appreciate this,” Maria answered, already pulling herself up into a standing position. She reached out with her hand towards Sarah and was a bit surprised when the Little seemed to shy backwards away from the offered handshake. Quickly dropping her hand back to her side she gave the woman an appreciative smile instead. 

“Come on Maria, let’s get out of the way so other people can have these seats. Thanks again Sarah. I’m sure the food will be delicious,” Natasha smiled genuinely as she grabbed onto Maria’s hand and began to tug her towards the exit. 

Once the two were outside in the hallway Maria pulled her hand out of Natasha’s grasp so she could wrap her entire arm around her girlfriend instead. “That was weird, right? The handshake thing?” she whispered.

Natasha nodded her head but didn’t say anything else so Maria decided to leave it alone, at least for now.


	13. Chapter 13

Once the two were back in their condo Maria made a beeline for the full size fridge. It was barely one o’clock in the afternoon but she could really use a drink. 

“Nuh-uh, hey, not if you still wanna drop for Little swim at two,” Natasha tutted, coming up behind Maria and plucking the beer from her hand. 

Maria grumbled but didn’t argue, reaching instead for the carton of apple cider. She then moved aside so that Natasha could get what she wanted, only her girlfriend seemed content with her confiscated beer. “I’m sorry, what was that about ‘Little swim’?” Maria asked, rolling her eyes.

“What, this? This is practically water to me, I’ll be fine.” 

Maria watched as the girl twisted the cap off the Bud Lite and tossed it onto the counter instead of in the trash can three feet away. “My apologies your Russian Highness,” she faux prostrated, doing her best to ignore the bottle cap. Instead she focused on finding herself a clean cup to drink her juice from. After pouring herself her drink and replacing the carton back in the fridge she took a seat on the sofa next to her now lounging girlfriend. 

The two sat in companionable silence for a good thirty seconds before Maria couldn’t take it any longer. She set her drink on the coffee table and pulled out her cellphone.

“You googling Sarah?” Natasha asked as she sipped lazily at her beer. She’d placed one foot up on the coffee table but Maria was too focused on her task to care about reprimanding her for it. 

“If by ‘googling’ you mean ‘illicit use of SHIELD’s databases’ then yep,” Maria responded as she scrolled through The Great Wolf Lodge’s employee records. It figures Sarah would have an extremely common first name. 

“She said she was the manager; it’ll be easier to find her if you sort by payroll,” Natasha offered between sips of her beer. 

Maria wrinkled her nose as she scrolled back up to the top of the very long list. Why hadn’t she thought of that? It took her another forty five seconds before she found who she believed to be their woman. “Alright, Sarah Jane Elton, 44 years old, Senior Restaurant Manager for the last 6 years, originally from Manitowoc, Wisconsin.

“Previously married to a Frank Jessop but divorced in ‘08. Has three children, Ashley and Amber, 26, and Zachary, 19. Jesus, the poor girl was eighteen when she had her first two kids. Imagine being pregnant as a senior in high school?” Maria blanched at the very idea. While she understood it was a lot more common nowadays for girls to have kids while still in school, Sarah was a child of the 80s. It must have been extremely difficult for her to not only go through with the pregnancy but also to keep and raise not just one child but apparently twins.

“I wouldn’t know on either of those accounts,” Natasha informed somewhat glumly and Maria could have kicked herself for the insensitive question. Of course Natasha wouldn’t know what being pregnant or going to high school was like.

“Does it mention a registered Big? I can’t imagine that that ‘screeching pterodactyl’ is her Heartmate but ya never know,” Natasha now asked. She’d finished off her beer and was now leaning forward to set the empty bottle down on the coffee table next to her ankle.

Maria blinked a few times to try and get her head back in the game. She started to skim the page, searching for any reference to who that woman might have been. “Nah, nothing. But I’m not really surprised. Would _you_ want to make your commitment to that beast official?”

Natasha smirked in response but stayed silent since the question was clearly rhetorical. 

Maria continued to search her phone for a few more moments before groaning in frustration. “I’m not sure what to do here, Nat. Sarah _flinched_ when I went to shake her hand,” she insisted, her anxiety mounting at the implications that could warrant. She reached out and wrapped an arm around her girlfriend’s shoulders so she could tug her close, needing the comfort the intimate contact would provide.  

Natasha moved easily against her, the shorter woman resting her head against her chest. “She _did_ flinch, but in all fairness so does Bobbi when strangers reach for _her.”_

“True, but Bobbi has a very good reason for flinching, doesn’t she?” Maria replied back. 

Natasha shook her head at the question. “As much as I dislike putting words in Bobbi’s mouth, we both know the physical abuse she suffered at the institution isn’t the reason she flinches from strangers,” Natasha explained, turning slightly in her seat so she could drape her legs over Maria’s lap. “I’m not saying Sarah has a sensory disorder but--”

“But there could be another reason, yeah, I got that,” Maria interrupted with a frustrated sigh. She turned off the screen on her phone and let it drop onto the couch next to her thigh. “So much for our relaxing vacation, huh?” she bemoaned, closing her eyes and resting her head back on the cushions. She could already feel a tension headache coming on. 

Natasha laughed quietly at this, the girl shifting once more so she could properly sit across Maria’s lap. “Five SHIELD agents, a former beat cop, and a two year old? Did you really think we’d make it the entire four days without something like this landing on our doorstep?”

Truthfully Maria hadn’t, but she still made a petulant whining noise in response. 

“Heeyy, come on, none of that. We did a good thing giving that dino lady our table. Let’s try and leave it at that for now, yeah? If we happen to witness something else before we leave we can deal with it then. Right now we still have to decide what we’re doing at two.”

Maria didn’t really like the idea of putting this issue on the backburner just yet but Natasha was right. Until they had more evidence that something was amiss they were basically at a dead end. “I thought we were going swimming at two?”

Natasha rolled her eyes as she poked Maria in the stomach. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

Maria _did_ know it but she poked Natasha back anyways. “As of this moment I still want to go dropped. You?” 

Natasha shrugged, shifting a little in Maria’s lap. “The kiddie area is kind of lame. If Izzy takes Gabrielle there I’ll drop, but if not I’ll probably just stay awake and hang out with you and Clint.”

Maria wrapped her arms around Natasha’s waist to try and keep her from fidgeting any further. Without the extra padding of a diaper between them the Little’s backside was rather bony and unpleasant on top of her thighs. Not that she’d ever tell the girl that, of course. 

“Whatever you feel comfortable with. I just don’t want you to miss out on some drop time because you think I need Auntie Nat with me,” Maria replied carefully. 

Natasha remained quiet for a few moments before slowly pulling out of Maria’s embrace. “Just to be clear, I’ll never _not_ be there if I think you need me,” she explained, leaning back so they could look each other in the eyes more easily.

Maria felt her cheeks heat up at the sincerity she saw on her girlfriend’s face. She started to reply but Natasha shook her head and placed a finger on her lips a moment before replacing it with her mouth. 

It was a nice kiss. Slow, warm, _private._ Unlike the one they’d shared earlier in the restaurant’s waiting area. Maria felt the stirrings of something in her stomach and she whimpered, her hands traveling down Natasha’s sides to rest on the girl’s hips. 

Natasha must have heard the noise since she pulled out of the kiss and nodded towards the couch to the left of them. “Lay back,” she instructed, already lifting herself off of Maria’s thighs.

Maria sat there dumbfounded, staring in shock at her lover. “Wait, are you serious? Here? Now?” Natasha honestly couldn’t be asking what she thought she was asking, right? It was the middle of the day! Their friends could be back at any moment! Not to mention the food!

A look of bewilderment spread across Natasha’s face for a split second only to be followed by one of incredulity. “Get your head out of the gutter! I just wanted a cuddle before we stuffed ourselves full of greasy carbs,” Natasha explained, clearly amused at the misunderstanding of her request. “Not to mention if I’d wanted a quickie I would have taken you to the loft bedroom. I’m not Bobbi, I don’t like doing it on the couch.” 

Maria knew that statement to be an outright lie but didn’t see the harm in letting Natasha think for the moment that she had higher standards than the rest of them. “I wouldn’t know anything about that. Bobbi and I keep our activities confined to the bathroom. Less chance of Clint walking in on us and being scarred for life.” 

Natasha simply rolled her eyes at that and pushed at Maria’s shoulders until she had no choice but to lay back on the couch cushions as originally directly. “Clint’s seen far worse from us, trust me,” the girl grinned, stretching out now on top of Maria’s prone body.

“I’m talking about a _physical_ scar. You know, like from a stab wound,” Maria deadpanned as she mimed jabbing Natasha in the side with an invisible knife. 

Natasha quickly lifted her head off of where she’d just settled it on Maria’s chest. “You are _not_ allowed to stab my boyfriend, do you hear me?” she insisted, though Maria could tell from the expression on her face that she wasn’t actually fearful of this ever happening. Still, Maria decided to push a bit further. 

“Well, he _did_ pull a gun on me, or have you already forgotten about the time he threw me into a wall and aimed a round between my eyes?” she asked, reaching up and curling her pointer finger around some hair that had fallen in front of Natasha’s face. It was growing longer than she was used to seeing it; nearly reaching the girl’s shoulder blades. 

Natasha narrowed her eyes and nipped at Maria’s finger like a puppy that didn’t want to be pet. “That was _one_ time. He’s pulled one on me at least a dozen times and I’ve yet to ever stab him for it.” 

Okay so that was unexpected. Maria did her best to swallow down the urge to get upset at this new information and instead flicked Natasha in the nose the next time she tried to bite at her finger. “You do realize we’ve just gone from nearly fucking to nearly fighting in the span of about thirty seconds, right?” she asked instead. She wasn’t actually angry or anything but the mood had definitely changed between them. 

“Well maybe I don’t appreciate my girlfriend threatening to stab my boyfriend, especially for something he did while trying to protect me.” Natasha sat up now but didn’t move off of her entirely. 

Maria was grateful Natasha hadn’t pulled away completely and she reached out, placing her hands on top of her thighs. “I didn’t say I was going to stab him for the gun incident, I was just using it as justification for why I’d stab him if he walked in on Bobbi and I. You may like that look he gets when he unexpectedly sees boobs but it kinda creeps me out, alright? Why are we even discussing this? What just happened here?” 

Natasha shrugged as if she didn’t know the answer to that, but the look on her face lead Maria to believe she actually did. “Nat?” she asked, scratching her nails gently over the girl’s thighs in the way she knew she liked. 

“I dunno, I guess it’s just weird hearing you talk so casually about sleeping with Bobbi. I mean, I know you two do it and I don’t mind that it happens, it’s just-- It’s just, you’re my _Soulmate,_ ya know? It doesn’t bother me when Clint and Bobbi sleep around but with you it feels different. It feels kinda like--”

“Cheating?” Maria asked, using the back of the couch now to pull herself into a sitting position. Once she was upright she prodded her girlfriend to scoot back a bit further along her legs. She couldn’t believe they were about to have this conversation here, of all places, and with food on the way no less. 

Natasha ended up shaking her head. “No. At least I don’t think so. Can you really cheat in a polyamorous relationship?”

Maria nodded very slowly. It felt like her heart was suddenly being squeezed by an invisible fist buried deep inside her chest. How long had Natasha felt this way? Why hadn’t she said something before now? “I’m pretty sure the agreement to have multiple partners doesn’t erase the concept of infidelity. If it _feels_ wrong then maybe it _is_ wrong? Nat, why didn’t you--”

A sudden loud knock at the door interrupted her question. Because _of course_ their food would be delivered at the worst possible moment. Why the fuck not? I mean, what else could go wrong in the span of a few short minutes? 

Sighing in frustration, Maria cleared her throat and shouted, “just leave it outside the door! We’ll get it in a minute!”

When at least ten seconds went by without another knock Maria relaxed a slight bit and refocused her attention on the girl still seated across her legs. “We’ve been together two years Nat, how long have you felt this way? Were you ever going to tell me or were you just going to hold it all in until you suddenly snapped one day and let it all out?” Maria was trying really hard not to get upset or angry but it was extremely difficult to keep her emotions in check when her girlfriend had been lying to her for so long.

Natasha remained silent, her lower lip pulled between her teeth as she stared at a spot on the back of the couch beside her. 

Her girlfriend’s atypical lack of response actually caused Maria’s anger to dissipate as her frustration slowly gave way to concern at what might be going on inside of Natasha’s head. “Nat, please talk to me. What’s going on?”

Natasha shrugged one of her shoulders, though the suddenly pained expression on her face told Maria that whatever it was, it wasn’t something to simply shrug at. 

“Tasha…” Maria breathed, wanting desperately to pull her Soulmate into her arms and to tell her to forget it, but she knew it would be better to pull the bandage off the wound now than to let it sit any longer and continue to fester. 

The girl in her lap winced almost imperceptibly and then took in a deep shuddering breath. “Bobbi and Clint are having a baby-- I mean, are _trying_ to have a baby.” Natasha actually looked pained at the words coming out of her mouth. “They want to start having kids, Maria. To have a family together, something you and I--”

It was Maria’s turn to reach out and press a finger to Natasha’s lips, though she didn’t follow it up with a kiss like earlier. “I swear to god Natasha, if the next few words out of your mouth are you telling me that you and I can never have a family, I might just have to stab _you_ instead of Clint.”

It was meant as a joke but clearly Natasha was too far down the emotional rabbit hole for humor and instead of laughing she actually began to cry. 

“Oh jeeze, Nat, I’m so sorry. That was an awful moment for a joke. Please don’t cry,” Maria pleaded as she tugged her girlfriend fully into her lap again. “I was trying to say that we could do that one day too, if that’s what you really want.” 

Maria had honestly never thought about having kids. Natasha was infertile and since she herself didn’t sleep with guys the prospect of children had always seemed like something that was for _other_ people or couples. Which made absolutely no sense since she knew there were ways of having kids that didn’t involve actual sex with a guy. Medical ways. Eggs fertilized in a lab and then implanted inside of her. Or adoption. There was always adoption. 

What the hell? Was she really actually considering kids with Natasha right now? At this point in their life? She was a few months away from turning thirty, sure, but she was also the second in command at SHIELD. How would a family fit into that? How could she risk bringing a child into such a potentially dangerous home life? Natasha was captured and tortured at least twice a year, if one of their enemies found out about the kid they could use that against her, get her to betray SHIELD and--

“Maria, Maria, come back to me.” Natasha’s words slowly drifted into her head, causing her to let go of her previous train of thought. 

“Hey, hey, you alright? Come on, look at me,” Natasha coached gently. Maria could feel her girlfriend’s hands on her face and she did her best to focus on that sensation and not the sudden emptiness in her stomach.

“What-- what the hell just happened?” Maria whispered, swallowing thickly. She felt like she’d just been running a marathon; her chest tight and her skin covered in sweat. 

“You were panicking sweetheart. You got this faraway look in your eyes and you started breathing heavily. Not hyperventilating. I think I got you out of it before then,” Natasha explained, her thumbs brushing gently across Maria’s cheeks. 

Maria nodded slowly and then reached up and grasped Natasha’s wrists in her own hands. “I uh, I think I got ahead of myself,” she explained, letting out a small breath of air in awkward amusement.

“Ya think?” Natasha also sounded somewhat amused, but mostly still concerned.

Maria gently pulled Natasha’s hands from her face and brought them to her chest instead. “I’m sorry, I just…” she shook her head, not quite sure at this point what to say.

Natasha leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Maria’s forehead. “Yeah, I know. It’s alright. You kind of surprised me too. That wasn’t actually what I was going to say, by the way, when you interrupted me so adamantly. You caught me off guard and that’s why I…” she trailed off, gesturing to the tears still coating her cheeks.

Maria whimpered as she looked at her lover’s damp face. “What do you mean?” she asked, not quite sure how she could have misunderstood Natasha’s intended statement. Unless… Unless she _didn’t_ want kids with her? Was it possible she could have made a judgment error that freaking big? Natasha may have been a world class super spy but Maria was her _Soulmate._ She couldn’t have fucked up reading her that badly, right?

Natasha’s face softened immediately as she no doubt understood what had just flashed through her mind. “When I’d mentioned Bobbi and Clint starting a family I’d been trying to say how they were starting one _without_ us, or without me, specifically. Ya know, ‘something you and I won’t be a part of’, not ‘something you and I can’t have ourselves’.” Natasha paused for a few moments as she scratched at her face.

“Honestly, Maria, I didn’t even think you _wanted_ kids. Not that we’ve ever really talked about it of course. Bobbi on the other hand, she’s always been extremely vocal about wanting them, even way back at the start of it all. 

“I’d only been a part of her and Clint’s relationship for a few months when she’d told me about the baby she had lost and how her husband at the time had made the decision on her behalf for the doctors to take her uterus in order to give her a better chance of surviving the complications that arose. I know it seems crazy fast looking back on it now but that same night I’d made a promise to her that one day when she was ready _I_ would do it; I would carry her and Clint’s child.”

Maria wasn’t sure what to think about any of this, but she did her best to remain neutral and calm so that Natasha felt safe and comfortable enough to continue. They didn’t have these types of discussions all that often and she couldn’t risk Natasha closing up on herself. 

“It seemed perfectly fitting at the time, ya know? She still has one of her ovaries and I’ve got a presumably functional uterus. If the two of us pooled our organs together we pretty much have a complete reproductive system.” Natasha paused again, this time alternating between tugging at her hair and tucking it back behind her ear. “I’d never wanted to have kids until she’d told me that story, and I’m honestly not even sure if at the time I saw it as me being a part of their family.”

“But that’s how you see it now, right?” Maria asked quietly, supportively.

Natasha nodded as she continued to toy with her hair. “A few weeks ago I accidentally discovered that her and Clint have been visiting a fertility clinic in Maryland. I’m not sure how long it’s been going on but you would think they’d have at least _mentioned_ it to me, right? If not outright brought me along with them to appointments?” Natasha pulled at her hair one last time before dropping her hand into her lap as if in defeat. 

“It’s stupid, Maria. It’s really, really stupid, but when I’d heard you just now talking about sleeping with Bobbi I think I got a little scared that maybe they were gonna ask _you_ to do it instead of me. I mean, it makes a lot of sense when you think about it. You would definitely be the safest choice between the two of us. We don’t even know for sure yet if my body _could_ carry a child to term. For all we know the Red Room may have fucked something else up that I don’t--”

Maria made an abrupt shushing noise to try and stop Natasha’s painful and unnecessary train of thought. “First of all emotions are _never_ stupid, Nat. Irrational maybe, but never stupid,” Maria insisted gently, reaching out and brushing some newly errant hair behind the girl’s ear before she had a chance to start pulling on it herself again. 

“And secondly, I want you to think about what you’re saying for a moment. If that really was their plan I would have had to be in on it, right? So did you honestly think I’d make a decision like that behind your back?” Maria asked, a flood of relief flowing through her when Natasha quickly and decisively shook her head.

“You’re damn right I wouldn’t. Not to mention there’s absolutely no chance in hell those two would ever choose me over you. And I’m not just talking about carrying their child. _You_ are their girlfriend, Nat, not me. Though I suppose it does make sense now why you’d brought up cheating earlier, but please trust me when I say we’re _not_ cheating on you, Nat. They would never do that to you, but more importantly, _I_ would never do that to you.”

Natasha whimpered, nodded her head slowly. 

Maria smiled reassuringly as she rested her hands on top of Natasha’s thighs so she could scratch gently at them once more. Silence stretched between them for a few moments before she eventually cleared her throat. There was one last thing she had to get off her chest before she’d be okay putting this issue to bed. “So all of that being said, would it make things easier for you if I stopped? The thing with Bobbi I mean.”

Natasha jerked back at the question, her eyes growing wide in surprise or possibly even shock.

“What? No, that’s not-- that wouldn’t--” Natasha started but then paused, shaking her head quickly as if to reformulate her thoughts. “Despite what I may have implied earlier, I _do_ understand why you sleep with her and I’m definitely okay with it.

“Sex with Bobbi is different. For her it’s not always about the emotions but the actual physical sensations. Sleeping with her is fun and exciting and occasionally even a little dangerous. But she just… she just _needs_ it sometimes, ya know? Clint can be too much for her when she’s overstimulated and so she comes to me, or I guess to one of us, and it’s an amazing feeling being able to help her calm down. I really, truly don’t consider it cheating, Maria, so please, don’t stop being with her because of this conversation, alright?”

Maria couldn’t help the flush that spread across her cheeks at Natasha’s entirely too accurate description of sleeping with Bobbi. “Okay. How about we leave it at ‘business as usual’, but with the option to revisit our feelings about this in the future?” she offered, wanting to make it clear that Natasha still had the ability to change her mind later on if she ever wanted to.  

“Also, I give you my word that if they ever come to me about carrying their baby I will refer all human incubator responsibilities in the direction of _your_ uterus.” She poked Natasha low in the stomach, grinning when the girl squealed in surprise and swatted at her hand.

“Yeah, okay. Or maybe we could _both_ volunteer and torture them with twins?” Natasha suddenly smirked, wiggling her eyebrows in that way she did when she was trying to be evil, even though it usually only came across as her being naughty. 

Maria actually felt herself blushing at the suggestion. For some reason the idea of the both of them carrying children at the same time felt oddly satisfying to her, though maybe they should hold that thought until they were ready to start their own family? If that option was even still on the table? Though judging from the way Natasha was staring hungrily at her now she kind of felt it still was. 

Which, speaking of hunger. “Okay, you seriously need to stop looking at me like that. We have even less time to fuck now than we did before all of this.” Maria placed her hands on her girlfriend’s hips to start helping her off of her lap and onto the couch. “Come on, let’s go get our lunch before another guest steals it.”

Natasha pouted for a brief moment but then gave up with an over dramatic sigh. “Fine, you win, I guess. But I get to use the microwave first!” she suddenly shouted, leaping to her feet. 

Maria rolled her eyes but decided not to argue. Cold burgers and fries weren’t really her thing but happy girlfriend’s definitely were. 


	14. Chapter 14

Ria tried really hard not to frown as she looked at herself in the full length mirror. Her green swim shirt was so big it hung almost to her knees! She bit back a whimper as she looked over her shoulder to where her big brother and big sister stood. Okay so technically Bobbi was her aunt right now since she wasn’t dropped, but the girl was still looking at her like she was something tiny and precious oh so adorable. 

“Nnnn..” Ria flapped her arms at her sides, the excessive amounts of fabric under her arms rippling beneath her armpits. She didn’t want to be precious and adorable right now. She wanted to be  _ normal, _ like every other Little at the swimming pool. She couldn’t say that though because Clint had picked the shirt out for her and she didn’t want to make him sad by asking for a different one.

Then there was also the fact that he’d gotten her a  _ green _ one when she should have had a--

“Oh my gosh! She’s adorable!” Victoria Hand squealed, having suddenly appeared in the doorway of their interconnecting rooms. Despite herself Ria felt her cheeks heat up at the exclamation. Okay so maybe being adorable wasn’t such a bad thing. 

“Ria, sweetheart, look at you! Look at your hair! Is that your doing?” Victoria was looking at Bobbi now and the girl nodded eagerly, a huge smile on her face.

Ria reached up and touched one of the french braids on the side of her head. She had two, like Pippi Longstocking, except her hair was still brown and boring instead of orange and awesome. 

“And the shirt?”

Clint raised his hand at the question. “I would have gotten bigger but they only had X-X-X-L,” he explained. “I wanted to get Natty a big one too but the blue shirts only went up to X-L.” He actually pouted at this and crossed his arms over his chest. Unlike Bobbi he was very much dropped into his Little headspace right now.

“Uh-huh, and is there any specific reason why? Other than the adorableness aspect? You know having their shirts be so floppy is going to make it harder for them to swim, right?” Victoria asked, stepping closer. 

Ria watched as Clint took a step back so the Big could take his spot behind her and she very slowly moved a little bit closer to Bobbi. 

“I wanted ones that would cover ‘em up. I don’t want any creepy pervs looking at my sisters,” Clint explained as if it were the most obvious reason in the world. 

Ria hadn’t thought about there being creepy pervs at the swimming pool. She whimpered, looking up at Bobbi’s reflection in the mirror. 

Her aunt rolled her eyes and stepped closer, wrapping a protective arm around her shoulders. “Don’t listen to him lil sis, he’s just being an overprotective poopy head.”

“Hey! What does overprotective have to do with being a poopy head!?” Clint shouted back, his hands now perched in his hips. 

Bobbi simply ignored him and hugged Ria against her side. “But your Aunt V is right. It’s going to be really hard to swim with your shirt like that. Hmmm.” 

Ria tried not to whimper when Bobbi let go of her and stepped over to the double dressers by the wall. She flapped her arms at her sides a few times as she watched her aunt looking through a black duffel bag sitting on top of the dresser. It didn’t take Bobbi very long to find what she was looking for though and soon she was coming back over with a pair of bright orange scissors in her hand. 

The Little got down on her knees and pulled the bottom hem of Ria’s shirt towards her. “I want you to turn when I tell you,” she instructed as she brought the metal against the fabric and began to cut. 

Ria wasn’t sure if what Bobbi was doing was illegal or not but since no one had said anything or tried to stop her she figured it must be okay. She stood perfectly still for a few seconds and then began spinning to her left when her aunt instructed her to. She made one complete circle before Bobbi said she could stop, a long strip of green fabric now in the girl’s hands. 

Bobbi set the scissors on the floor and then began tying the fabric around Ria’s waist as if it were a belt. Because the excess fabric made funny rippling effects around her torso the end result was a rather ugly looking dress and Ria made a face to appropriately express her displeasure at the update to her outfit. She didn’t really like dresses to begin with and this one just looked super dumb.

“Okay I’ll admit, not my best work, but it’ll be easier for you to move around in the water this way sweetheart,” Bobbi explained as she tried tugging and moving some of the ugly fabric ripples around her waist to even them out. “A little help here Ma?”

Victoria stepped closer behind Ria and slowly reached out, pulling on some of the fabric along her back. “You look fine sweetheart. No one will see you once you’re in the water anyway,” she explained, though Ria didn’t feel all that reassured by her words. She kind of wanted to pull the belt off but she didn’t want to make Bobbi sad and so she didn’t. Instead she kept her eyes on the big black words written across the front of the fabric.

RIA - 6

RM 302

She’d never seen her name written out before. It was silly to have feelings about that because her name was really just a part of her bigger name and she’d seen her bigger name written out loads of times. She’d never seen just ‘Ria’ though and it made her stomach feel all warm and floppy to know that that was  _ her. _

She was  _ Ria, _ not Maria, and this was  _ her _ shirt. It may have been the wrong size and color but it was still  _ hers _ and she loved it even if she really did look super dumb in it.


	15. Chapter 15

Isabelle nodded her head absently as she listened to the less than enthusiastic stream of words coming out of Natasha’s mouth. She wasn’t really paying attention to the exact words the Little was using, having long since developed the ability to gather the basic gist of an argument without needing to really focus too intently on it. 

A few years into their relationship Victoria had begun using her as a sounding board at night and so learning how to pay attention without _really_ paying attention had been a skillset she’d needed to learn in order to stay sane. Telling her wife she wasn’t interested hadn’t really been an option since she could clearly see how badly her Soulmate _needed_ to get things off of her chest, but still, there were just some things she really didn’t want to know about what was going on in the world. 

Not that Natasha was currently giving away state secrets or anything, but the girl’s unhappy tirade about the kiddie swimming area still felt as critical and emotionally compelling as hearing about what _really_ happened during this or that international hostage crisis. Which honestly said more about Natasha’s acting skills than it did about the situation itself. I mean, how bad could the kiddie pool actually be? 

“It’s not even two feet deep, Iz! And that rubber padding?? I get that it’s softer for babies to crawl on but it’s stupid slippery for adults. And can you _imagine_ all the germs that must be stuck in that rubber? How often do you think they drain the water and clean it? Honestly if Elly was my kid I wouldn’t let her _near_ that cesspool of filth and baby poop.”

Isabelle made an “mm hmm, that’s very interesting” noise in the back of her throat as she finished wiping her daughter’s backside clean. She had started the process of potty training Gabrielle a few weeks ago but knew better than to try and continue her lessons during their vacation. 

“Not to mention how insulting it is to assume that all Toddler Littles can’t swim. I mean I get the need for a separate color shirt, I really do, but why does blue also have to mean ‘restricted to the kiddie area’? Ria’s only six yet _she_ gets to go on the rides that actual six year olds can’t go on! So why are Babies restricted to only baby rides? It’s entirely unfair and almost feels like discrimination, don’t you think?” 

Isabelle cocked her head to the side as she considered the last part of the girl’s argument. It really wasn’t discrimination in the true sense of the word since Toddler Littles were in factbeing treated like toddlers. The fact that older Littles were allowed to go on rides their child counterparts couldn’t had nothing to do with their mental age and everything to do with their height. As long as a Little could swim there was no reason to restrict them from the various “adult” slides in the waterpark. 

It was different with Toddlers though. Even though Natasha had a valid point that being a Toddler didn’t automatically mean they couldn’t swim, being a Toddler _did_ mean that they had to wear swim diapers at all times while in and around the water. 

Isabelle was honestly surprised that Natasha hadn’t put this together herself but as far as she was aware the restriction of blue shirts to the kiddie area was actually about reducing the risk of _bathroom_ accidents, not actual swimming related accidents. Closing down the kiddie area for a few hours was one thing, but closing down the entire waterpark? As frustrating as this rule clearly was for those it adversely affected, Isabelle honestly agreed with it. Besides, it’s not like Natasha _had_ to drop for Little swim. She could always go as a Caretaker for Little Ria if she truly was unhappy with the blue shirt limitation.

“Hand me that, please,” Isabelle instructed the still ranting Little, pointing with her elbow at the package of blue and purple swim diapers next to the girl’s towel covered hip. 

Natasha paused her speech as she glanced down at the brightly colored package. “You’re not even listening to me are you?” she accused with a rather fierce pout. 

Isabelle shook her head gently as she pointed once more at the water diapers. “Of course I’m listening to you hon, we’re just running a bit late is all. Can you please pass me one of those before this little rugrat squirms away?” Gabrielle wasn’t actually squirming at the moment but Isabelle knew from experience that her daughter’s docile nature could flicker on and off at random, like a lamp that wasn’t quite plugged in correctly.

Not to mention it was already difficult enough trying to dress her with one hand when she was laying still, so to attempt to get her into something skin tight while she was flopping about? Isabelle let out a soft breath of amusement at the very thought. She was more likely to regrow her missing appendage than she was to succeed in _that_ endeavour. 

“I don’t wanna,” Natasha eventually replied, her previous pout morphing into a genuine frown.

“You don’t wanna?” Isabelle repeated, her own frown starting to form across her face. She’d been wondering why the Little had decided to sit in on her efforts to get Elly dressed when she very clearly hadn’t finished doing so herself. Apart from the tankini top Natasha was wearing she was most likely still naked beneath the towel wrapped around her waist. Which wouldn’t have been a big deal except for the fact that she hadn’t made any overt indication that she wanted help with the task, or with the act of dropping itself. 

Even though the current Littles in her life were both old enough to dress themselves, Isabelle _did_ have some previous experience Caretaking younger Littles. She also had previous experience dealing with Natasha in general and so understood that her current behavior was probably some form of test. Most likely to see if she could be manipulated into dropping her without verbal consent. Not that it really mattered in the end since Isabelle had no intentions of participating in the girl’s unhealthy mind games regardless of her reasons for playing them. If Natasha wanted her help getting dressed or entering a drop she was going to have to use her big girl words and _ask._

“El, I’m gonna scoot you across the floor, alright? Please grab whichever color diaper you want to wear,” Isabelle instructed her two year old while miming with her intact hand the act of grabbing something. Gabrielle smiled cheekily up at her and nodded her head, her little hands reaching up and mimicking the motions. “Okay baby, on the count of three. One. Two. Three!” Isabelle pressed the flat of her foot against her daughter’s naked hip, carefully sliding both her and the beach towel she was laying on across the slippery tile floor. 

Gabrielle squealed as she was moved towards the package of diapers. Without needing to be reminded of her task she reached out and grasped one. “Blue!” she exclaimed happily as she lifted her chosen garment over her head and began waving it back and forth for her Mommy to see. 

“You picked the _blue_ one?” Isabelle gasped, acting as though she were both shocked and delighted at the girl’s decision. “You know that’s Mommy’s favorite color don’cha?” She gripped the edge of the towel and began to tug the giddy toddler back towards her. 

“Blue!” Gabrielle repeated, tossing the diaper at her mom and then giggling at the astonished expression Isabelle gave her in response. “Bluueeee! Blue blue blue blue!”

“Yes baby, it’s blue, but we don’t throw things okay?” Isabelle reprimanded half heartedly. Truthfully, if Natasha hadn’t been in the room with them she would have let it slide without any comment at all. “I need you to lay still for me now. Can you lay still for Mommy so she can get this on you?” 

Gabrielle shook her head and began kicking her feet wildly in the air. Her good behavior lamp was definitely flickering now. 


	16. Chapter 16

Isabelle sighed and shot a glance across at Natasha, noting how the Little was watching her daughter with a mixture of fascination and possibly even jealousy? It was clear that she wanted to drop and be taken care of but until she said the words Isabelle’s proverbial hands were tied. 

“This is all your fault you know,” she said, somewhat accusatory but mostly just trying to initiate conversation with the Little. 

Natasha frowned as she drew her eyes away from the fussy toddler. “Huh?”

“I’d asked you to give me a hand and you refused so now ‘little miss wriggle worm’ is all riled up,” she explained, tickling her daughter’s belly despite knowing it would only exacerbate the issue. Gabrielle was ticklish to the extreme; a characteristic she oddly enough shared with her other mother. 

Not that Victoria would ever admit to being ticklish, mind you. SHIELD made sure to train its agents to withstand all types and forms of torture, but Isabelle could see it in her wife’s eyes nonetheless. That tiny bit of panic that set in whenever she got a bit frisky at night. It amused her greatly, especially since she only had one hand with which to “attack”.

Refocusing her attention again on Natasha, Isabelle couldn’t help but wonder if the Little was ticklish as well. “Wanna make up for it and give me a hand now?” she asked, inclining her head towards the discarded blue swim diaper sitting a foot to Gabrielle’s left. 

Natasha chewed on her lower lip for a few moments, her eyes drifting between the toddler and the diaper. “No…” she whispered resolutely, though her actions betrayed her verbal response. Despite indicating she didn’t want to help she began to inch her way closer to the diaper, sliding herself along the tile floor while still sitting on her backside. 

Isabelle decided not to comment on the mixed message and simply waited until Natasha got close enough to the diaper to then reach her hand out for it. Unfortunately as soon as she did so Gabrielle took the opportunity to roll onto her belly and begin crawling away across the beach towel. 

“Oh no you don’t!” Isabelle playfully gasped, forgetting about the diaper and instead reaching out and grasping her daughter’s ankle gently. The baby squealed and dropped down on her stomach, her other three limbs flailing about as if she were fighting off an attacker. It was entirely harmless play acting, something both her and her wife did with the two year old fairly often, but at the sound of the girl’s shrieks Natasha responded as if it weren’t play acting at all.

Before Isabelle could react Natasha was pushing her backwards, the Little shoving her body in between herself and her daughter as if to shield her from the “attack”. 

“No!” Natasha yelled loudly, scooping the baby up into her arms and hugging her tightly to her chest. 

For her part Gabrielle froze at the sudden reorientation, but then at Natasha’s shout predictably began to cry. 

“Elly, baby girl, it’s okay. Auntie Natasha didn’t mean to scare you,” Isabelle explained as calmly as she could, somehow managing to catch her balance before she fully landed on her back. She wasn’t so much worried that Natasha would hurt Gabrielle as she was Victoria hearing her daughter’s cries and barging in with a gun in her hand. 

Isabelle understood intellectually that there was a unique type of danger associated with the Little. Something to do with a split personality that her wife claimed was basically an emotionless murderbot. However having never seen this personality herself she wasn’t all that worried that that’s who she was witnessing now. This felt more like “protective Big Sister” than “dangerous Black Widow”.

Gabrielle on the other hand didn’t seem to know the difference and continued to cry, reaching her arms out for her Mommy to take her back. 

“Natasha, we were just playing. Gabrielle’s safe and unharmed. Can you put her back on the towel please?” Isabelle asked, her voice steady and calm in the hopes it would help reassure the Little that what she was saying was true.

Natasha looked at her in what almost appeared to be confusion before she glanced down at the distressed toddler in her arms. 

Isabelle felt her heart leap into her throat for a split second, afraid the Little was about to drop her daughter like a hot potato. She forced herself to remain where she was though, not wanting to accidentally provoke the girl into doing the thing that she didn’t want her to do. 

Thankfully Natasha’s grip on Gabrielle remained firm as the Little bent herself lower and gently placed the baby onto the towel. 

Once she was no longer in the air Gabrielle ceased her struggling for a split second, seemingly confused by the turn of events. Isabelle gave her daughter a reassuring smile then held her hand out again in invitation. “Come here baby, it’s alright,” she cooed.

Natasha released her hold on the girl entirely, her hands falling into her lap as Gabrielle squirmed onto her hands and knees in order to crawl back across the towel. 

As soon as she was close enough Isabelle shifted onto her knees and reached out, gripping her daughter under the armpit and hoisting her upwards in a way she tended to avoid because it made Victoria nervous that she would hurt or accidentally drop her. “Hey, I’ve got you, I’ve got you,” she soothed, pulling the child close to her body so the two year old could grab onto her. 

Half a moment later there was a knock at the door and as predicted Victoria’s concerned voice spoke up. “Everything alright in there? Why is El crying?” 

Isabelle cast a glance at Natasha, wondering if her wife was aware who else was in the bathroom with her. If she’d known would she have done more than just knock and ask a question? 

“We’re fine V! Natty accidentally startled her is all,” she explained, not quite lying but not quite telling the truth. The prolonged pause that followed made her uncertain whether her partner believed her or not. 

After a handful of seconds Victoria eventually responded with, “ Natty’s with you? I thought Clint said she wasn’t going to drop?”

Huh. That was information Isabelle kind of wished she’d had earlier. If Natasha had made it verbally apparent to her that she wasn’t planning on dropping then she wouldn’t have been reacting to her as if she were expecting she might. “That’s weird. I guess she changed her mind?” Isabelle replied, gently bouncing her daughter in her arms to help soothe her lessening sobs.  

“Do you uh-- do you need any help in there? Natasha’s Toddler stuff is in the Bear’s bathroom. She’s going to need a swim diaper if she wants to go in the water.”

Isabelle nodded her head even though her wife couldn’t see her. “Yeah, I’m aware. Wanna grab one and leave it outside the door for us? She said she wanted a blue one so she could match Gabrielle.” 

There was another long pause but then the sound of departing footsteps could be heard. Isabelle let out a sigh of relief at the fact her Soulmate hadn’t pushed. It’s not like Natasha would have been holding her hostage so that her answers were under duress, but still her wife was incredibly wary of anyone other than the two of them being alone with their daughter. 

If their positions had been reversed Isabelle honestly wasn’t sure if _she’d_ have let the matter go, or if she’d have barged in guns ablazing at the first hint something might have been wrong. 

But then nothing was really wrong, was it? It’s not like Natasha had actually harmed Gabrielle, or threatened her in some fashion. Sure she’d been knocked back but that was only because Natasha had believed the baby was in danger from her. If anything she should be _glad_ Natasha had behaved that way since it meant she was looking out for the two year old. 

While all of this was going on the Little in question remained silent and motionless, but now that they had a few minutes to themselves Isabelle began to notice the subtle change in her. She wasn’t dropped, but she wasn’t quite her adult self either. She was on the precipice but still seemingly needed that last push over the edge. 

Sighing, Isabelle gave in and decided to ask if she needed help, only as soon as she opened her mouth Natasha spoke up instead.

“Why?” the girl asked, her eyes focused on the blanket between them. 

Isabelle knew what she was referring to but still responded, “why what?”

Natasha let out a deep, shuddery sigh and then slowly brought her eyes up to meet Isabelle’s. “Why didn’t you tell her I grabbed your daughter?”

By now the girl’s sobs had quieted down though her tear stained face was still buried against Isabelle’s chest. Instinctively she began rubbing her daughter’s back in slow, soothing circles. “What would have been the purpose of telling her? You didn’t harm her. In fact, you were trying to save her from what you believed was someone _else_ trying to harm her.” 

It was clear from how Natasha’s face remained impassive that she didn’t quite believe her answer. 

“Nat, you’ve been teetering on the edge of a drop for the last twenty minutes. You’re emotionally unstable and therefore easily confused. That’s _normal,_ trust me. Lance gets the exact same way when he’s being stubborn about going down. I think it’s just harder for you because your Littleself is so much younger and the extreme differences in age exacerbates the confusion. You didn’t mean to scare Gabrielle, you were just reacting on a combined instinct. Your adult self thought “danger” and your Toddler self thought the solution was to push me over and grab her.” Isabelle wasn’t too sure if bringing up her Heartmate was the smartest thing to do, but the comparison did seem to stick with the Little. 

Natasha nodded ever so slightly before opening her mouth to respond, except before she could there was once again a knock at the door. 

Isabelle winced as the girl seemed to withdraw back into herself, going so far as to scoot herself backwards along the tile so she was pressed against the sink cabinet. 

“I couldn’t find a blue one in the package. Will purple be alright?” Victoria’s voice sounded through the door. 

Isabelle rolled her eyes but then nodded her head, even though once again her lover couldn’t see her. “Purple’s fine. Leave it outside the door and I’ll get it once she’s ready to put it on. She had a bit of an accident so I’m working to clean that up first.” She hated outright lying to her wife but what other reason could there be to not let her inside the bathroom with them? “I’d suggest staying away from whatever it was she had for lunch.” 

The horrified expression that quickly descended on Natasha’s face almost got Isabelle to laugh and break their cover. “Sorry,” she mouthed silently, genuinely feeling bad about the girl’s justified embarrassment. Her warning seemed to do the trick though and once more she could hear footsteps moving away from the bathroom door. 

“You realize you’ve just made it a billion times worse, right? I don’t-- I don’t _do_ that. If she tells Clint or Maria they’re going to come rushing in here thinking I’m dying or something,” Natasha protested, speaking more words in one go than she had all the rest of her sentences so far combined.

Isabelle shrugged her shoulders at the girl’s admittedly justifiable concern. “Both of them are dropped right now. I’m pretty sure the last thing either of them wants to do is assist in _that_ type of diaper change.” She wasn’t quite sure if that were true or not, but the response seemed to reassure the Little somewhat. “But in the off chance that I’m wrong, can you go grab the diaper before someone else _does_ show up?”

Natasha started to move but then stopped, a suddenly mischievous expression crossing her face. Instead of going to the door like she’d been asked to do she instead crossed her arms over her chest and jutted out her chin in defiance. “I don’t wanna.”

“You don’t wanna?” Isabelle repeated, this time not holding back her laugh. “Well _someone’s_ not gonna be able to go swimming unless she brings me her water diaper. Do you know who that someone might be Elly?” 

Gabrielle made a soft grunting noise against Isabelle’s shirt at the question but didn’t make any further attempt to answer. 

“Hmmm, I think it might be _both_ of you. Do you think it might be both of you?” Isabelle prompted as she suddenly began tickling her daughter in the side. As predicted the two year old began to squeal and squirm, trying to get away from the surprise attack. 

Across the bathroom there was also movement, but this time instead of coming towards them Natasha was actually moving away towards the bathroom door. The Little had shifted onto her hands and knees in order to do so and the towel that had previous been wrapped around her waist began to pull undone. 

Not that it mattered now. In the split second following Isabelle’s threat of the two not being able to swim the Little had finally dropped. It was actually dizzying how quickly it had happened and Isabelle was more than a little glad she had a few moments to emotionally catch up before Natty eventually turned around and saw her stunned expression. 

Ignoring or uncaring of the fact that she was now naked from the waist down, Natty used the door handle to first pull herself up onto her knees and then to push the door open. Half a moment later an enormous purple swim diaper was in her hand and she was tugging the door back closed. 

“Purpah!” Natty exclaimed, turning around and dropping onto her backside so she could use both hands now to lift the diaper up over her head, mimicking what Gabrielle had done not ten minutes earlier. And then also like Gabrielle she quickly chucked it across the room at Isabelle in delight. “Purpah!” 

Isabelle dodged out of the way of the flying water nappy and immediately put on her best “shocked” expression. “Natty! You silly thing!” she laughed, knowing better than to even attempt to reprimand the girl for throwing things. She just hoped her daughter didn’t get the wrong idea that it was suddenly now okay to behave like that. “Come over here you silly goose. I need you to be my extra hand so we can get this little jelly bean ready for swim time.” 

Unlike the previous two times Isabelle had asked for help, this time she actually received it and in less than five minutes both Gabrielle and Natty were diapered up and ready to head down to the waterpark for Little swim. 


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No chapter for two weeks then two chapters in 24 hours *shrug* lol

Ria clung super tight to her Big Brother’s hand as they got off the elevator and began making their way towards the waterpark. She was excited, sure, but also extremely nervous. What if she didn’t like swimming? Or even worse, what if she  _ couldn’t _ swim? She knew that her other self could swim really well but sometimes what her adult self could do didn’t always transfer to her Littleself. The fear that she might slip underneath the water and not know how to get back up had her gripping even tighter to Clint.

“Woah, hey, you okay lil sis?” the boy asked, clearly having noticed her sudden death grip on his hand. 

Ria nodded her head quickly, smiling in that way Auntie Nat did when she was lying but didn’t want others to know that she was. It seemed to work because Clint smiled back at her and continued to lead her down the hallway and towards the gigantic double doors separating the rest of the hotel from the waterpark.

“Now Clint, remember what we agreed upon. Ria only goes on rides that she  _ wants _ to go on, not ones that you’ve convinced her to try.” 

“Yeah, yeah, I got it Aunt V. Ria’s been my Sister  _ way _ longer than she’s been your Little,” he replied with a huff. 

Ria kind of wanted to argue that she wasn’t actually Aunt Victoria’s Little but she kept quiet, knowing it was part of the game they were playing that week. Uncle Phil was going on a super long vacation and so his friend was going to be her Big for a while. 

Not that  _ Uncle Phil _ was her Big or anything, though secretly she wished that he was. If he  _ were _ her Big then he wouldn’t be allowed to leave her with someone else, right? He wouldn’t be able to leave her behind while he went on some stupid business trip for his super dumb job. 

“Ya know, he’s got a point there,” Aunt Isabelle agreed, her voice sounding like she was trying not to laugh. 

“Hush you. You’re not helping.” 

Ria frowned at the bickering and cast a glance behind her as she walked. Aunt Isabelle was smiling like she’d definitely made a joke but Aunt Victoria didn’t actually look all that upset with her. Maybe it was because most of her focus seemed to be on keeping Natty moving forward at the same pace they were. 

Unlike Uncle Phil and Uncle Nick, neither of her aunts were able to carry Natty around on their hip. At least not while also carrying a bunch of beach supplies as well. 

Natty clearly wasn’t happy with having to walk the entire distance from their hotel room to the waterpark but Ria kind of thought that maybe it had more to do with the unusually large diaper between her legs and not the act of walking itself. 

Swim diapers weren’t the same as regular diapers. Not only were they boring solid colors without any pictures, they were also twice as big as the ones the Toddler normally wore. Ria had asked why this was but neither of her aunts seemed to know how to explain the difference to her. Something about asorpatuncy in water. Ria didn’t know what asorpatuncy was but she still nodded her head and smiled like she did. 

She did feel bad for her sister though. The water diaper looked extremely uncomfortable and awkward to walk in. She couldn’t imagine how hard it would be to swim in it as well. At least the blue t-shirt Clint had gotten the Toddler wasn’t as big as the one he’d gotten for  _ her. _ Natty actually looked cute in her baby blue shirt, whereas Ria couldn’t help but feel stupid in her own green “dress”. 

Tugging on the belt holding the fabric close to her waist, Ria wondered if perhaps she could take it off once she was in the water. Aunt Bobbi wasn’t going swimming with them so even if the adults saw what she was doing they wouldn’t have their feelings hurt the way that Bobbi would have. Ria felt bad that she was happy her aunt wasn’t with them since she knew the reason the girl was staying behind had to do with something she couldn’t control. Loud noises made her aunt feel sick inside of her head sometimes and that’s why she got to swim in the morning when it wasn’t crowded yet.

Stepping now into the waterpark for the very first time, Ria could definitely understand why her aunt felt that way. The place was huge! And noisy! Everywhere Ria looked there were Littles and their caretakers running about, laughing and screaming as they played both inside and outside of the water.

“You’re alright, Ri, I’ve got you,” Clint spoke up as he tugged her off to the side so they weren’t blocking the entrance. “I know it’s really scary looking but I promise you’ll be safe with me.” 

Ria nodded her head as she tightened her grip once more on her brother’s hand. She trusted Clint almost as much as she trusted her Aunt Nat, even when he was Little like her. He was twelve, which was almost as old as a teenager! That was pretty much the same thing as being an adult in her eyes, though clearly it wasn’t the same thing in their aunts’ eyes.

“Clint, please don’t take her into any deep water just yet. I want to help get Natty and Elly settled in the kiddie area before I come join the two of you. Can I trust you to watch her and not let her go in over her head?” 

Clint actually looked upset at the question, a huge wrinkle spreading across his forehead as he scrunched up his face in displeasure. 

“Yeah, okay, I know, you’re the best Big Brother in the entire world and you’ve got this,” Victoria added with a laugh, reaching out and poking the boy in the forehead directly between the two biggest wrinkles. This got him to yelp and swat at her hand while also sticking his tongue out. “Behave you two, at least until I come back and can keep an eye on you both.”

Ria wasn’t sure why Aunt Victoria was telling  _ her _ to behave as well since she had no intentions of acting out the way that her Siblings often did. Still she nodded her head and smiled, watching with growing excitement as well as anxiety as the adults turned and headed towards the kiddie section of the waterpark. 

Now that they were alone Clint made a loud grumpy noise as he shook his upper body back and forth half a dozen times. Ria couldn’t help but laugh at the movements since it looked like a dog shaking its head when it got its fur all wet. Even though Clint wasn’t wet he still looked just as relieved when he was done. 

“Aunt V can be  _ such _ a party pooper. You don’t really know her yet but trust me on this,” he explained, tugging gently on her hand to get her once again moving forward. “This place isn’t anywhere  _ near _ as dangerous as some of the other places you and I have been. I don’t see why she’s gotta be like that, acting as if we’re gonna get hurt on a perfectly safe water slide.”

Ria struggled to keep up the pace with her Brother, her bare feet not used to walking on the rough concrete paths between the various slides and pools. Part of her wanted to remind him that  _ she’d _ never been anywhere as dangerous as this. That where her adult self had been didn’t really count for her the same way it seemed to count for him. Clint was way older than all the rest of them so none of them really knew how his brain worked when it came to shared memories between his selves. 

Then again baby Natty seemed to remember things her adult self did at times, so maybe the problem was really just with her? Maybe she was  _ supposed _ to remember things like knowing how to swim? Her head hurt just thinking about all the things she was maybe supposed to know how to do but didn’t. Or maybe swimming was different? Maybe it was like riding a bicycle? Ria already knew how to ride a bicycle even though no one had ever taught her how to do it when she was dropped. 

“You’re stopping. Why did you stop? Do you want to go in there?” Clint asked, his voice snapping Ria out of her spiraling thoughts. 

Blinking in confusion, Ria followed Clint’s gaze towards a strange looking pool with gigantic buckets spilling water from up above. Some of the Littles in the water were floating on colorful plastic donuts though it didn’t look like the water was very deep. Some of them were actually standing up in places which meant that Ria could probably stand up as well. 

Nodding her head at his question, she couldn’t help but smile at the enormous grin that spread across his face. She must have picked the same pool that  _ he _ wanted to go in!

“Awesome! See, Aunt V doesn’t know what she’s talking about with me pressuring you into things. Come on, I see an inner tube that looks like it has ducks on it! Let’s go grab it before some other kid gets to it first!” 

Ria was glad she hadn’t let go of her brother’s hand just yet since he suddenly began to sprint towards the entrance to the pool. It took all of her focus and balance to keep up with him without tripping, but her excitement at getting to use a duck colored donut made it totally worth it. 

 


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! School started up again and things have been kinda crazy because of it. 
> 
> I've also been working on a new story in this series, one that takes place after The Avengers but before The Winter Soldier, that features Natasha and Steve. I've written almost 7k words of that so far but don't plan to post any of it until this story is finished. I don't want to do to this fic what I did to those other ones I never completed :( I'm just mentioning it because I wanted you guys to know I *have* been writing, just not in this fic lol. 
> 
> Comments as always are greatly appreciated! I'm sorry if this one seems kinda boring or slow at this point. I promise it'll get interesting again once the *thing* happens next chapter ;)

Ria was having the time of her life. Not only was the pool she’d selected shallow enough she could stand up but the floating donut Clint had gotten for her had at least a hundred tiny ducklings printed on it! It had taken her a while to figure out how to climb into the donut without flipping it over. Even though the pool wasn’t very deep, having her head dunked under the water like that was still super scary!

Not to mention the green t-shirt dress she was wearing made it incredibly hard to move around since the fabric was even  _ more _ heavy and awkward when wet. She’d managed not to pull off the belt so far but she kind of thought she still might, maybe when Aunt Victoria stopped watching her and Clint and went back to the kiddie pool area to check on Natty and Elly?

“You having fun sis?” Clint asked as he walked himself through the water towards her. He wasn’t sitting on top of the donut like Ria was but instead was standing inside of it with his arms resting on the plastic. Clint’s donut didn’t have ducks on it but Ria wasn’t sure if her brother even liked ducks the way that she did. She knew he liked ninja turtles but she didn’t think there would be ninja turtles donuts here. 

“Uh huh!” Ria replied back enthusiastically, nodding her head and kicking her feet underneath the water. She was currently sitting in the middle of her donut with her legs hanging off one side and her back resting on the other. It meant that her hair, arms, feet, and backside were all in the water but the rest of her was above it. 

Clint smiled brightly at her and reached out, playfully tickling her toes.

Ria gasped and slapped her feet against the surface of the water to try and get him to stop. She wasn’t angry or scared but she really didn’t like to be tickled,  _ especially _ when she was stuck in a floating donut and couldn’t run away!

“Okay, okay,” Clint laughed, raising both of his hands now up near his head. “I’ll stop.” 

“Thank you,” Ria replied politely even if she was kinda a little upset at her brother for tickling her in the first place.

Clint must have been able to tell from her voice or the look on her face because he suddenly stopped smiling and looked serious. “I’m sorry, Ri. I forget sometimes that you’re not like Bobbi or Natty.”

Ria raised her eyebrows at that, not sure if he meant that in a good way or a bad way. She knew she wasn’t like her Sisters; she was still new to all of this. To being a Little in public. To having a family. Was she not as good at being a Little as Bobbi and Natty? Or was she not as good at being a Sister? She hoped he didn’t think that! She was trying really really hard to be like her Sisters but some things were still new and scary to her, like swimming pools.

“Oh hey, no, please don’t cry,” Clint told her, almost sounding like he was going to panic. 

Ria shook her head and rubbed at her face with her arm. Even though she  _ had _ made herself upset she didn’t think she was going to cry. Maybe he was confused because there was already water on her cheeks from the pool? 

There was the sound of plastic rubbing against plastic and when Ria moved her arm away she saw that Clint had walked closer so that their donuts were touching one another's. He looked like he wanted to pick her up and give her a great big hug. “I’m okay,” she insisted, kicking her feet underneath the water a few times to hopefully show him that she was telling the truth. 

Clint sighed and nodded, leaning forward and resting his upper body on his donut again. Ria couldn’t see beneath the water very far but she imagined his feet were still touching the bottom. If they weren’t he would have drifted away from her by now. 

“Can we play on a slide?” Ria asked him, hoping her suggestion would cheer him up. She knew he liked big slides so maybe if they went on one together he wouldn’t look so unhappy?

Almost instantly a huge smile spread across his face. “You wanna go on a slide with me?” he asked, standing up straight once again. This time instead of letting the donut settle around his stomach he lifted it off his body and tossed it a few feet away into the water. 

A tiny bit of regret flowed through Ria’s body when she realized she would have to give up her duck donut in order to go on a slide. She wasn’t going to change her answer though, not after seeing how happy the idea made her Big Brother. Nodding her head she began to wriggle herself left and right, trying to fold herself more in half so her backside and legs would fall through the hole in the donut. She already knew trying to get off while on top of it would lead to her flipping over and going under the water again.

“Aww, Ria, you’re too big to squeeze through that way. Hold on, I’ll walk you closer to the steps,” Clint instructed as he took hold of one of the donut’s plastic handles and began to push her towards the edge of the pool.

Ria squealed playfully as Clint spun her around a few times once they’d gotten to the steps. She rested her head back against the donut and stared up at the rotating ceiling, giggling endlessly as he stopped and began to spin her in the other direction. 

“Oh nooo, looks like you’re caught in a whirlpool!” Clint laughed as he continued to twirl her around in the water for another minute or two, changing directions every so often. Eventually he stopped twirling her, his hands now steadying the donut in the otherwise still rippling water. 

Ria was both sad and happy that the whirlpool was over. Sad because it had been really fun spinning around endlessly, completely helpless to stop the movements. But also happy because she was super dizzy now and wasn’t so sure she’d be able to walk, let alone swim!

“You look like an upside down hermit crab stuck in there like that,” Clint commented teasingly as he pushed the donut towards the metal hand rail that lead out of the water. 

Ria kicked her feet at her brother, splashing water onto his already soaked shirt. She didn’t know what a  _ hermit _ crab was but she knew that crabs were mean and liked to pinch people who swam in the ocean. Not that  _ she’d _ ever swam in the ocean but she’d seen lots of movies with people swimming there.

“Help me?” she asked, deciding to ignore his crab comment. Gripping the handrail with one hand, she waved the other at her Brother. Since she’d tried falling through the donut hole earlier she was having trouble pulling herself up and out of it by herself.

“Sure thing my little hermit crab,” Clint repeated the phrase, clearly amused with himself at the comparison.

Ria stuck her tongue out at him in response. She was going to have to ask one of her Sisters to show her a picture of a hermit crab later. Hopefully he wasn’t making  _ too _ much fun of her by calling her that. Pushing all of that aside for now she allowed Clint to grip her upper arms in his hands so he could help hoist her upwards and onto the steps leading out of the pool. 

Even though she was mostly out of the water the donut hadn’t let go of her backside, so now she was standing on the top step bent almost in half with her butt sticking out behind her. She squeaked unhappily and let go of the railing, using both hands to push at the offending flotation device. It came off easily enough and dropped back into the water with a small splash. 

“See? Totally a hermit crab,” Clint grinned, coming up the steps beside her and wrapping his arms around her shoulders in an all too familiar side hug. “I guess it runs in the family. Remind me to show you pictures later of Natty on the beach in Bora Bora. She got stuck in an inner tube as well so Bobbi had her walk around on her hands and feet while she took a bunch of pictures.”

Even though the image sounded pretty funny, Ria couldn’t help but frown at the idea that her Big Sister would have taken photos instead of helping the Toddler out. 

“Aww, no, it wasn’t like that,” Clint hastily added, having looked across at her and no doubt seen her unhappy expression. “Natty was laughing the whole time. She thought it was  _ hilarious _ being stuck like that. Too bad the spoiled shrimp thing happened that night as well. That vacation had been  _ amazing _ prior to the non stop projectile vomiting.” He wrinkled his nose and shook his head as if to rid himself of the memory.

Ria hadn’t heard any of this story before and was kinda glad for it. She hated being sick, but even more than that she hated the idea of her Baby Sister being sick. 

“Anyhoo! Let’s go pick a slide to go on, yeah? Are you dizzy from the spinning or do you think you can walk?” Clint asked, helping her the last step out of the pool and onto the rough concrete walkway. 

Ria shook her head at the questions. She wasn’t dizzy but she really didn’t want to walk on the scratchy floor any more than was necessary. “Up?” 

Clint grinned, turning around so his back was to her. “Okay, hop on!” He bent his knees, lowering himself so that Ria was able to wrap her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. Once she was situated he stood back up, his hands gripping her beneath her knees since she wasn’t strong enough to hold herself up the way that Natty was. 

“Imma take us aaaaallll around the waterpark. Just yell if you see a slide you want to go on,” he instructed.

Ria nodded in understanding but then followed that up with an enthusiastic “‘Kay!” She really didn’t know what kind of slide she herself would like to go on so she decided to look for one she knew her Big Brother would like. Hopefully whichever one she  _ did _ pick out wouldn’t end up being too scary for her!


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay! I've taken on way too many things and have barely any time right now to write :( I hadn't wanted to break this scene up into more than one chapter but I honestly don't know when I'll get another moment to write so I figured this was better than nothing for now.

This was a bad idea. A no good, terrible, _awful_ idea. The slide Ria had eventually chosen wasn’t just the tallest one in the waterpark, but it was also completely enclosed like a gigantic black and blue spiral hose. 

Victoria had watched with growing trepidation as the two Little’s headed towards the enormous shark themed monstrosity, her inner voice of reason telling her she should put a stop to this. Ria had clearly only picked this slide because she’d sensed that Clint wanted to go on it, but she was worried that if she vetoed the girl’s decision now it would cause her clam up the next time she had a choice to make. 

Phil hadn’t had much time to prep her for this “mission” before he’d left on his own assignment, but the few things he’d managed to tell her led her to believe that the Six Year Old needed as many normal life experiences as she could get after having suffered in isolation for most of her life. Choosing a waterslide that was much too scary for herself was technically a normal life experience, but that didn’t mean Victoria had to like any of this one bit. 

Standing at the edge of the splash pool at the bottom of the dual tubular slides, Victoria tried her best to keep the concern she felt off her face as she waved at the two currently ascending the wooden staircase. They were almost at the top by now and despite being nearly two stories below them she could clearly see Ria was starting to panic. 

Clint, oddly enough, seemed completely oblivious to his Sister’s distress. Or maybe he was acting that way on purpose? Maybe he knew that keeping calm himself would help to calm Ria? Victoria hoped that’s what it was, even though it didn’t look like his efforts were paying off all that well. 

“Shit,” she whispered under her breath as she began to pace along the edge of the pool. The Little’s were almost at the top now and Ria was definitely not okay. At least Clint had finally decided to acknowledge this and was now hugging the girl to his side, hopefully reassuring her that she didn’t have to go through with this if she didn’t want to. 

In the twenty minutes that Victoria had been standing there watching, four other Littles had made the decision not to go through with the ride. Unfortunately there wasn’t a separate staircase for going down so the process of leaving the line pretty much amounted to a walk of shame. Not that she believed Ria would care about something like that. She was probably way more concerned with upsetting her Brother than she was what others thought about her.

As the minutes continued to tick by, Victoria honestly thought about approaching the lifeguard standing on the steps to the pool. Maybe she could ask them to radio up to the top of the ride and tell them not to let Ria onto the slide? Or would that be overstepping her bounds as the girl’s temporary Big? What if she hurt her even more by _not_ letting her go through with the ride? Damnit, Phil would know what to do if he were here!

“Ma’am, I’m going to need you to step back a bit. You need to be on the other side of the white line,” the lifeguard in question suddenly spoke up, snapping Victoria out of her thoughts. 

She frowned as she looked down at her feet, having not even noticed the spray painted line up until that moment. Even though she hated the thought of being further from Ria once she landed in the pool, she obliged the lifeguard’s orders and took two steps back so that she was on the appropriate side of the line. 

Unfortunately while she was doing that she missed the moment that both Ria and Clint stepped up to their respective slides. Not that she had any power to stop things at that point, but still her heart rose up into her throat as she watched Ria’s head disappear beneath the wooden railing of the platform. She’d actually sat down on the top of the slide! She was actually going through with this! 

Victoria placed both hands over her mouth to stifle her panicked gasp. Ignoring the lifeguards previous request, she moved back up to the edge of the pool and began to bounce on the balls of her feet, her upper body straining forward as if she could see up the bottom of the slide for the girl. 

The ride itself was only about thirty seconds long, but it was the longest half minute that she could remember waiting for the girl to appear out the bottom of the slide. Clint appeared first out of his own enclosed tube, his large muscular body slamming into the water at a speed that nearly took Victoria’s breath away. He was fine though, his instincts immediately kicking in and allowing him to right himself beneath the water. The pool was shallow enough he was able to stand up once he was properly oriented, but instead of heading towards the stairs he turned around and started towards the exit of Ria’s slide. 

It was then that Victoria realized Ria should have exited by now. The two slides were basically the same length despite having different bends and turns built into them. Clint was heavier than Ria so it made sense he’d finished his ride first, but as five seconds turned into ten seconds, turned into fifteen seconds, Victoria knew without a doubt that something was wrong. 

Ignoring the loud whistle and sudden shouts from the lifeguards, she jumped into the pool and began to swim towards the exit of Ria’s slide. It took her less than ten seconds to get there, but in that time she must have envisioned at least two dozen awful scenarios of what may have happened to the girl. The fact that she couldn’t hear any screaming from inside the slide was the worst part of it. If Ria had somehow gotten stuck inside the tube she should be screaming in fear, right? Unless she’d gotten stuck in a section that was filled with water?? Oh god, the girl could be drowning in a low lying section of tube right now and she was absolutely powerless to help her!

“She was right beside me! She said she was alright!” Clint told her as she swam towards him. Even though he had aged up he very much looked on the verge of tears. “She said she wasn’t scared! Where the hell is she!?”

Behind her Victoria could hear a bunch of lifeguards shouting to each other, and probably at them as well, but she wasn’t paying attention to what they were saying. Her sole focus was on the outlet of the tube slide half a dozen feet in front of them. 

“I’m gonna climb in--” Clint told her as he started to swim towards the slide, but before he could get even halfway there a sudden flood of water came surging out of the tube towards them, followed immediately by a figure that was almost completely tangled up in a gigantic green shirt!


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh dear lord I’ve taken on way too much in my personal life! Updates are unfortunately going to be very sporadic until about Christmas time when my 14 hour days will thankfully become normal 8 hour days. 
> 
> This chapter ends abruptly but hey, it’s an update at least lol ;)
> 
> Love you guys and I promise I will get around to replying to comments soon!
> 
> Also, trigger warnings for face slapping and mentions of past torture.

After exiting the water slide, the tangled up Little immediately sank to the bottom of the pool. Clint had been closer to the drowning girl’s position and it was all Victoria could do to not start screaming as she watched and waited for the two to resurface. There were lifeguards in the pool now, swimming towards them and shouting instructions that she skillfully ignored. She wasn’t moving from her spot until she had both her eyes  _ and _ her hands on her friend. 

Not long after Clint had disappeared beneath the water he reemerged, a struggling ball of soggy green fabric now bobbing on the surface in front of him. Maria’s arms and legs were thankfully no longer enveloped in the t-shirt, but at some point the fabric had drifted up and over the top of her head, completely covering her face. This of course meant that even though she was above the surface of the water now she still couldn’t breathe. 

“Jesus, Clint! Get that shirt off her! She’s gonna drown herself!” Victoria shouted, half swimming and half running through the water in a frantic attempt to reach them. They couldn’t have been more than a dozen feet away but it honestly felt like  _ miles. _

“Maria, Maria! Calm down! We’ve got you, you’re alright!” Clint instructed, his arms firmly around his friend’s torso. He was struggling to stay standing in the deeper water, his own face and mouth frequently disappearing beneath the waves the struggling Little was creating. “I can’t get it off! If I let her go she’ll sink again!” 

Victoria wanted to scream at him that it wouldn’t matter if she sank because she was drowning anyway. Even though her head was above the water the wet shirt was acting as a barrier, making it difficult or maybe even impossible for her to breathe without also inhaling pool water into her lungs. 

“Maria! Maria!  _ Hill! _ Stop struggling!” Victoria instructed in her own rising panic, having finally reached the two and immediately taken an elbow to the face. Ignoring the sudden blurriness in her left eye she quickly began to fumble for the hem of the shirt floating in the water behind Maria’s head. The fabric was too dense and thick for her to tear it in two so she knew the only solution was to find the edge and pull it back over her face. 

By now a pair of lifeguards had reached them and were attempting to pull Maria from Clint’s arms and into their own. Victoria ignored the sudden shouting match and instead focused on freeing her friend’s face. The girl had only seconds left before she undoubtedly passed out. At that point her suffocating body would act on instinct and involuntarily breathe in, filling her lungs with water and most likely completing the drowning process. 

She had to get her free before that happened!

Despite Clint’s reluctance to let the two lifeguards touch Maria, their added presence actually began to aid in keeping Maria still. At least still enough for Victoria to find and separate the two edges of the t-shirt and finally be able to drag it up and over Maria’s head, exposing the girl’s panicked, pale face to the air. 

Unfortunately this sudden change didn’t seem to register with Maria and instead of breathing in the oxygen her body desperately needed she continued to hold her breath. Despite her change in circumstances her mind was still refusing to give up control, defiantly acting against her body’s wishes in her continued attempt to not allow herself to drown. If Victoria wasn’t absolutely positive her friend was seconds away from inadvertently killing herself she might have actually been impressed with her self control. 

Then again, this wasn’t the first time she’d seen Maria Hill defy the odds when it came to this particular type of fatality. There was a  _ reason _ SHIELD had decided to start training it’s agents to withstand waterboarding, and the struggling, ridiculously stubborn girl in front of her was it. 

“Breathe, Maria! Come on! Breathe damnit!” Victoria slapped the girl’s face, hoping to shock her out of the memories she was no doubt lost inside. It had taken her almost a minute to get the agent breathing again the first time around; they didn’t have that luxury now. As willful as Agent Hill was, she was still only human and the clock was ticking on how long her body could physically go without oxygen. 

“Hand! Stop! Just let her pass out! They’ve got oxygen, she’ll be okay!” Clint shouted at her as he attempted to turn himself and Maria in the water, most likely trying to shield her from being slapped again. 

Victoria rationally understood that Maria passing out was the better of the two options at this point. The girl was no longer in danger of inhaling water so letting her body do its thing while her mind rested was probably the best course of action. Maria would survive, sure, but she would most likely be terrified when she woke up again. 

Even though Victoria had been on the rescue team and had seen first hand what the agent had experienced, she still didn’t know the true extent of Maria’s torture. How many times had she been waterboarded into unconsciousness, only to wake up and be waterboarded again? 

No, she couldn’t let her friend experience that level of fear again. She couldn’t let her pass out, not until she was confident Maria understood that she was safe. 

“Clint, Maria’s AIR53,” Victoria explained as she moved in the water, following Maria’s body as Clint continued to turn her. The lifeguards had also tried taking Maria from him but the threats for physical harm that had come from his mouth thankfully caused them to back off. 

They were so getting banned from the resort when all of this was done. 

“AIR53?” Clint repeated, his flushed face scrunching up as he no doubt tried to place that particular protocol. AIR stood for “Advanced Interrogation Resistance” Training, but the number was what Victoria knew would get to him. 53 had been implemented six years ago after an unnamed agent had not only undergone, but successfully withstood prolonged waterboarding by an enemy terrorist cell in the Middle East. 

Only those agents who had been on the rescue mission, Fury, and probably Coulson knew who that agent was. Everyone else at SHIELD had speculated for a while, though they eventually seemed to come to the unanimous conclusion that the agent must have been Romanoff. The fact that Natasha was notoriously phobic of having her head held underwater helped to cement that conclusion. 

“That-- That happened to  _ Nat. _ What are you--?” Clint began, clearly having believed the false rumors as well. Which was actually rather startling to discover because if  _ he _ believed Nat had been waterboarded in the past then maybe she actually had been? Independent of this particular incident, that is. 

“53 is  _ Hill. _ If she passes out she’ll wake up and think she’s still being tortured,” Victoria insisted, her focus already back on Maria now that Clint had stopped trying to protect her. She slapped the girl’s cheek again, this time twice as hard as before. Maria’s face was already turning blue, her eyes unfocused and half way to rolling to the back of her head. 

_ Fuck! _ She wasn’t going to snap her out of it in time!

Clint must have been able to read this conclusion in her expression because he suddenly thrust Maria into her arms, then reared his arm back and slapped his friend,  _ hard. _

As agonizing as it was watching him strike her, Victoria actually felt a sense of relief in knowing the responsibility was no longer in her hands. She’d broken Maria’s cheekbone the first time around; she didn’t want to be responsible for injuring her like that again, even if it was in the process of saving her life.

Not to mention if anyone was going to be able to knock some sense into the stubborn girl, it was going to be someone who was almost twice their size. It was a horrible, nauseating thought, but in that moment they needed his upper body strength to be able to hit Maria hard enough to shock her back into reality. 

And it worked. Thank god. Clint had been winding back to strike again when suddenly Maria’s eyes flew open and the girl began gasping and choking desperately for breath. 

“Maria! Maria! You’re okay! I’ve got you! It’s Hand! I’ve got you!” Victoria shouted over the sound of the girl’s painful inhalations. She briefly made eye contact with Clint, indicating with her head that he needed to get out of Maria’s line of sight. Even though she was consciously breathing on her own now didn’t mean she wasn't still trapped inside of a flashback. The last time around she’d nearly gouged out Agent Crawford’s eyes on the quinjet ride to the nearest SHIELD friendly hospital. He’d only been trying to cover her shivering, wet body with a blanket and she’d reacted as if he were the enemy attempting to smother her again. 

“Han-?” Maria spluttered, her gasps becoming more frantic as she started to regain her strength and instinctively began to struggle in the water again. 

“It’s me, I’ve got you. We’re in Wisconsin, at a waterpark. You were dropped and got trapped in your shirt,” she explained as she slowly began to walk the two of them towards the stairs leading out of the pool. She had no idea how much time had elapsed since the incident had begun but thankfully there wasn’t much of a crowd gathered to see what was going on. Though that was probably due to the dozen or so lifeguards currently standing around the pool and not because the other guests had willingly chosen to give them privacy. 

Which actually begged the question, where was Natasha? She had to have felt Maria’s panic during all of this. 

A sudden splash in the water next to them answered Victoria’s question. 

“Oh my god! Maria!”


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry this chapter is so late. Life is just... yeah. Not bad exactly, just very very busy. I’m hoping the fact this chapter is longer than typical makes up for that, though I have a feeling after the way I left the ending y’all are gonna be mad at me anyways ;) 
> 
> Not much left for this fic, actually. One more chapter between Victoria and Maria and then after that a really important scene between Maria and Nat. Other than that it’s just finding a way to bring the story to a close. 
> 
> I do have the next story already planned out and have actually written about 7k words of it so far. I’m just trying to be good and not post any of it until this one is officially put to bed. 
> 
> Thank you as always to everyone who’s reading and commenting. And not just on this fic but on any of my fics. Your continued, enthusiastic support means so much to me! I will honest to god try to reply to comments this week. But just because I’ve fallen behind on that doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate each and everyone one of them!

Maria couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t breathe. _She couldn’t breathe._  

Hands, holding her down. Hands, covering her face. Water. Water everywhere. In her eyes. In her mouth. In her lungs. She was drowning. She was dying. She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t breathe!

_Smack!_

“Don’t do this to me Hill!”

_Smack!_

“Take a god-damn breath!”

_Smack!_

“You’re not dying on me!”

_Smack! CRACK!_

Maria’s eyes flew open as pain erupted down the left side of her face. Something was broken. Her jaw? Her cheek? Her eye socket? Not that it mattered since she was about to die anyway.

“Hill?! Hill! It’s Agent Hand! You’re not drowning, take a breath!”

Except she was! She _was_ drowning! Everytime she opened her mouth water filled her lungs. Every. Single. Time. Over and over again. She couldn’t do it! She couldn’t open her mouth! She didn’t want to die!

“Jesus, Hill, I’m so sorry for this--”

Another slap against the side of her face and suddenly it was all Maria could do not to scream in agony as the already fractured bones in her cheek shifted painfully under her skin. Her throat was too raw to make much noise regardless, but the shock of the slap had her suddenly gasping and wheezing for air, much to the relief of her terrified and exhausted body. 

She wasn’t drowning anymore.

She wasn’t going to die!

“Good girl, that’s right, just breathe, Maria. You can do it.”

She could do it. She could _do it._ She could breathe! She wasn’t going to die! 

“Oh my god! Maria!” 

There was a sudden splash next to her and then a set of hands began pulling on her shoulders. Pushing on her body. _Oh no! Oh no!_ There was water on her face! It was happening again!

“Ow! What the fuck Mar?!” 

“Let her go, Nat! She’s confused! She thinks you’re gonna hurt her!”

“I would _never_ hurt her! She knows that!”

“Tash, let it go. Let Vick handle this. Maria needs _her_ right now, not us.”

“It’ll be okay, Nat. I promise. Clint, help me get her out of the pool.” 

Maria blinked rapidly, shaking her head in confusion at the conversation going on around her. Who were these people? Why were they talking like they knew her?

A strong pair of hands were now gripping her beneath the armpits, hoisting her upwards. Her first instinct was to struggle, to fight against her abusers once more, but the calming voice was still talking to her, reminding her that she was safe and that she wasn’t drowning. 

It was a familiar voice. Trusted. Safe. A co-worker. A friend? A fellow agent, obviously, but there was something more. A connection? They were a Big. She was a-- Oh. _Oh no._

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, I’m still here, shhh,” the voice soothed as a smaller set of hands wrapped around her torso. The larger hands eventually let go and she felt herself falling, tumbling into an equally as wet individual. They were both _soaked,_ rapidly cooling water dripping from their bodies onto the rough ground below. 

Maria shuddered. Too much of her skin was bare to the elements. She wasn’t naked, but she wasn’t completely clothed either. Whatever she was wearing was skintight. A bodysuit maybe? Something was also hanging off of her neck, pulling her head down with the weight of it. Whatever it was she wanted it _off._ She didn’t want anything holding her down ever again. 

“Okay, it’s okay, we’ll get that shirt off you. Clint, can you--”

“Yeah,” the not as soothing, but still just as familiar voice replied. 

Suddenly the larger hands were reaching for her again and Maria whimpered, turning and pressing herself into the warm body that was still helping to hold her up. 

“Maria, it’s just me, it’s Clint. Your big bro, remember? I’m just getting the shirt off your neck.”

“Clint?” Maria repeated, knowing the name but not the context he’d used it in. She didn’t have a brother. She didn’t have _anyone._

“Iz, I think she’s in shock. Can you handle the mess here while I take her upstairs and get her warmed up?” 

“Yes, yes, of course. Do you want Nat to go with you? Maria might want her when she comes back around.”

“I think it’s best if she stays with you and Clint for now. Bobbi’s up there currently, I’ll send her down with your phone.”

Iz? Nat? Bobbi? Clint? Maria scrunched her eyes tight, trying to place all the names. They were familiar. Everything about these people were familiar, she just couldn’t remember why that was. 

“C-c-c-old,” she stammered, wincing as the large hands began tugging something heavy and wet against the back of her head. They weren’t covering her face so she wasn’t quite nervous enough to panic. Not yet at least. She was so tired, though. And cold. She didn’t know if she even _could_ panic at this point. 

“Up and over, that’s it. Aaaaand it’s off.”

Maria watched through blurry eyes as the figure backed away, a soaking wet wad of green fabric in his hands. A t-shirt. _Her_ t-shirt? In the back of her mind she remembered wearing an oversized green shirt like a dress. Why would she do that? She _hated_ green. She hated _dresses._

“Go, we’ll take care of things here.”

Go? Go where? Why did green shirt large hands want her to leave? 

“Alright, come on hon, there’s a warm shower with your name on it upstairs.”

Maria felt herself being moved forward by the soothing voice and even though she was still confused as to what was going on she didn’t resist or even question their destination. The promise of a warm shower was enough for her to ignore the rest of her predicament. There was also the fact she wasn’t in pain anymore, even when she reached up and pressed her hand against her cheek. 

The next few minutes felt like a blur. They were clearly someplace public, but also with private rooms? A hotel? Soothing voice had mentioned a hotel room. 

Once they’d finished walking and entered inside said hotel room there was another figure talking to her, reaching for her. They were familiar too, but try as she might Maria couldn’t figure out how she knew these people.

“Bob, no, I’ve got her. I need you to take Isabelle her phone. She’ll explain what’s going on. I’ll call once I think she’s back to normal.” 

“Okay, yeah, of course. But uh, you know your makeup is gone, right?”

“I figured it would be. It’ll be fine, they’d have found out eventually anyways.”

Huh? Found out what? What was going on?

Maria blinked, turning her head away from the chest she had it pressed against. She tried craning her head backwards to see soothing voice’s face but her vision began to swim and her legs grew wobbly beneath her.

“Woah, hey, I’ve got you. Come on, let’s get you in the shower before you collapse.” 

*****

Maria wasn’t sure how it happened but the next thing she knew she was sitting on a cold tile floor underneath a delightfully hot spray of water. Her back was pressed against the front of someone’s body but instead of feeling intimidated by the proximity she actually felt relieved. Relaxed, even. Like the figure behind her was going to keep her safe and cared for and _warm._

“Mmmm, what happened?” she asked slowly, her head lolling to the side as she fought against the urge to close her eyes and fall asleep. She felt like she’d been sleeping for _years,_ her body heavy and slow and aching all over. 

“You had a panic attack. Got stuck in a flashback from a previous mission. Maybe even dissociated a little? You’re fine now and everyone else is fine. Nat may have a bit of a shiner in the morning but I’m sure she’ll forgive you eventually.”

Maria winced as the fogginess in her brain began to fade and she started to remember on her own. They were at a waterpark. She’d been dropped and had gotten stuck in her shirt. She’d panicked, thinking she was being tortured. Thinking she was being waterboarded again. 

“Oh,” she replied after a few moments. She was embarrassed, mortified even, but not nearly enough to pull away from her friend. In fact, she actually found herself moving closer so she could climb into Victoria’s lap and rest her head more comfortably on her shoulder. “You smell nice.” The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them and Maria groaned, even _more_ embarrassed now. 

Victoria laughed and hugged her tighter against her chest. “Don’t worry hon, I’m _supposed_ to smell pleasant to you. Especially after an incident like that.”

Maria shook her head slightly but didn’t pull away. “But I wasn’t dropped during it. I’d woken up before I’d even hit the water,” she explained, closing her eyes as Victoria began to push some of her waterlogged hair away from her face. The shower was still raining down on them but it wasn’t uncomfortable and so she didn’t try and move out of the line of spray. In all honesty it actually felt _amazing_ being pelted by the hot droplets of water. Like a full body massage being delivered by a thousand tiny, warm hands. 

“I know that sweetie. Your brain did what it was _supposed_ to do when faced with a life or death situation, but just because you weren’t dropped doesn’t mean you don’t need or deserve comfort afterwards. You think I only take care of Bobbi if she’s dropped during an episode?” 

“Yeah but you’re Heartmates so it’s different with the two of you. You’re not _my_ Heartmate, at least I don’t think you are,” Maria replied, biting her lower lip in thought. She honestly had no idea what having a Heartmate felt like. Early on she’d kinda thought that Coulson might have been hers, but the fact he didn’t seem to share the sentiment made her second guess her understanding of what it should feel like. She knew Natasha was her _Soul_ mate, however. There had never been any doubt in her mind about that. 

Victoria began to shift her legs beneath her, stretching them out and to the sides after having had them curled indian style for what must have been a bit too long. Maria tried not to whimper as her backside ended up on the cold tile floor once more. She thought she should feel guilty about the awkward position she was keeping the older woman in but for some strange reason she didn’t. 

“We’re not Heartmates, Maria, but I’ll admit it makes me feel ridiculously happy in here to know you weren’t really sure,” Victoria replied, one of her hands shifting off of Maria’s back so she could press it against her own chest over her heart. “It’s incredibly rare for someone to have two Heartmates, at least at the same time. If one dies then sure, it can happen again, but typically you’ve got one and that’s it. Natasha is, once again, a rare exception to the rule.”

Maria already knew that having two Heartmates was rare, but still, she couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed having their lack of a potential bond confirmed. Even though Hand may not have been her first choice for a permanent mother figure she would have still preferred having _her_ over having no one at all.

“Oh Maria, I can _feel_ you getting upset right now,” Victoria commented as she replaced her arm around Maria’s back. 

“Yeah well, I can _feel_ you rejecting me,” Maria didn’t mean to snap at her but the words came out before she could stop them. She felt her face heat up in shame and remorse. Victoria was doing more for her than her father or _he_ ever had, so why was she acting this way? 

“I’m not rejecting you, Maria, I’m just being honest. Besides, I don’t have to be your Heartmate to care about your wellbeing. Do you honestly think I’d have agreed to you guys crashing our vacation if I didn’t want to Care for you? Do you think I go around sitting on cold shower floors with any old agent of SHIELD? Do you think I’d be doing this with Rumlow if _he’d_ been the one to freak out?”

Maria couldn’t help but scrunch her face up at the thought. While Four Year Old Brock was tolerable for the most part, his adult counterpart was an absolute _ass._ “Probably not,” she eventually agreed.

Victoria made a noise in the back of her throat that sounded like a confirmation. 

Neither of them spoke for a few minutes, though the quiet wasn’t as awkward as Maria would have feared. Eventually though she felt her body beginning to protest their prolonged positions on the floor. The water from the shower had also begun to turn luke warm, a telltale sign that freezing cold spray was just around the corner.

“You don’t smell as nice anymore,” she found herself saying as she pulled her face away from Victoria’s shoulder. Once again her mouth was faster than her brain and she winced in apology.

“As long as I don’t smell _bad…”_ Victoria replied with clear amusement in her voice. “Truthfully I’m surprised the high lasted as long as it did. You smelled nice to me too for longer than I was expecting. I mean, longer than is typical for non bonded pairs. Maybe it’s just because you haven’t had much experience using Bigs for aftercare?”

Maria nodded at that. Even though she’d lived with a Big for a year and a half, _he’d_ never comforted her the way Victoria just had. It made her heart ache to think about herself at sixteen, foolishly believing that what she’d had with _him_ was the best she could ever get. 

“I’m probably going to need help standing up. You’re not heavy, but you’re also not Natasha,” Victoria prodded, nudging Maria in the side to indicate she needed to start getting up. 

“I’m also not Bobbi,” Maria replied with a smirk, having her own experiences dealing with dead arm and leg syndrome since the larger, more muscular girl still fell asleep on her from time to time. Most often it occurred after a mutual drop, but occasionally it was the end result of their adult selves participating in _other_ activities. Maria felt her cheeks turning bright red at the suddenly inappropriate thought.

If Victoria could tell where her mind had just gone to she thankfully didn’t show it, instead reaching out to take her hand as the two carefully began to pull themselves up to their feet. Just in time too since the shower head suddenly began pelting them with ice cold water. 

“Shit!” Maria gasped, letting go of her friend so she could hop out of the shower stall. Not that the heavily air conditioned bathroom air was much better, but at least there was a pile of fluffy towels within reach. Taking two for herself, Maria quickly wrapped one around her torso and began using the other to soak up as much water from her hair as possible. She was still wearing her bathing suit but she’d deal with changing into proper clothes later. Right now she just wanted to get dry and _warm._  

“Gee, thanks for abandoning me!” Victoria teased from where she still stood inside the shower. Maria watched in the mirror as her friend shut the water off and then stepped out onto the large bath mat behind her. There were two more towels folded on the counter and Victoria grabbed the top one, wrapping it around herself in a similar fashion. She then grabbed the second and wrapped it across her shoulders beneath her hair, for some reason forgoing wringing it out first. 

Maria moved to the side a bit, giving the woman some room to step up next to her at the large bathroom vanity. It was then that she noticed something she’d never before seen on her friends face, and judging by Victoria’s suddenly hesitant, almost insecure expression, it was clear that the woman understood that Maria had finally discovered her secret.

Apparently baby Gabrielle wasn’t the only one in the family with a rare skin condition. 

 


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter this time guys, but the next bit is going to be much easier for me to write if it's from Maria's POV. We should be in the home stretch now! A little bit of angst but then fluff and then an ending... if I can think of one lol.
> 
> Small warning for negative or disparaging self talk/thoughts with regards to a visible medical condition. Not sure if I needed to warn for that but just incase.

Victoria was a grown fucking woman yet she still felt her heart skydive into her stomach the moment Maria’s eyes drifted up to her forehead. Her  _ exposed _ forehead. The forehead she normally kept caked in layers upon layers of makeup to hide the fact that she suffered from a rare autosomal dominant disorder known as piebaldism. 

Ugh. Bobbi had totally been right about the risks of wearing her normal makeup near the water. Except the waterproof variety didn’t come in the exact shade she needed and blending the thicker, pastelike foundation would have been more of a headache than simply trying to keep her head above water.

Or so she had thought. Victoria hadn’t taken into consideration the possibility that she’d have to dive into the water to save one of her charges lives. Not that she regretted the decision to jump in and save Maria, she just really really hated the way the other woman was looking at her right now. Like she were some sort of freak of nature. Like she were a side-show oddity meant to be gawked and laughed at from behind a wall of glass. 

“Dude, that is so fucking  _ cool.” _

Or… she could possibly be projecting her own insecurities into the situation. It wouldn’t have been the first time she’d done that and it most certainly wouldn’t be the last time either. To say she had self esteem issues concerning her atypical appearance would have been the single largest understatement one could possibly make about her. Victoria absolutely  _ loathed _ her condition, but not nearly as much as she loathed the way others looked at her when they finally got to see her “true self”. 

Well, others except for Maria, maybe. No one had ever looked at her the way Maria was now looking at her, as if she were a beloved rockstar or celebrity or something. It made absolutely no sense since the  _ last _ thing Victoria looked like was an individual others would want to idolize or admire. 

“When I was little I used to steal my grandmother’s makeup so I could paint my face to look like my toy ponies. My absolute favorite was light brown with a white stripe all the way down its nose,” Maria explained, dragging her pointer finger down her face to illustrate the pattern. 

Not that Victoria needed the visual aid to know the pattern Maria was referencing since it was the exact same one the unpigmented skin on her face took. Starting at the very top center of her forehead, the pale white marking traveled in an elongated triangular fashion down towards the bridge of her nose. It didn’t quite reach the tip of it however, instead drifting off to the side and over part of her right eye. 

This of course meant a section of her eyebrow and eyelashes were completely white too since the condition affected her hair follicles the same way it did her skin. Thank god her waterproof mascara actually lived up to its name. As much as Victoria hated her discolored skin, she hated her snow white hair even more. It was the reason she’d started dyeing it as soon as she was old enough to purchase her own hair care products. 

Unfortunately, unlike her mismatched skin tone, trying to blend her white forelock in with the hair surrounding it was a fruitless endeavor. Even if she somehow managed to get the color exactly correct, the moment her roots started showing she would have to start all over again. 

Eventually she’d discovered it was much easier to hide her deformity under the guise of having  _ chosen _ to bleach her hair white. Despite the fact that having a bright neon colored streak of hair had brought her just as much unwanted attention as her  _ actual _ hair did, she’d still preferred others thinking she was simply going through a rebellious teenager phase than them knowing the actual truth. 

The fact that she was no longer a teenager didn’t do much to dissuade her from continuing the tradition. It just meant it was now socially acceptable for her to tell people to fuck off when they questioned her about it. 

She didn’t feel like telling Maria to fuck off though, which was strange because she’d had some very choice words for Bobbi the first and only time the girl had compared her appearance to that of a horse. Maybe it was because her Heartmate hadn’t meant it in the awe inspiring way that Maria now seemed to? Or possibly because Bobbi had known her well enough by then to realize her angry words weren’t really directed at  _ her, _ but at the myriad of people who had made her life a living hell while growing up.

Either way, Victoria simply frowned as she continued to study Maria’s seemingly star struck expression. 

“I think I understand the bright color now, but why red? I thought your favorite color was blue?”

Victoria’s eyes widened at this. She hadn’t been sure if Maria would make the connection that her colorful forelock was part of the condition or not. Then again, since Maria was already familiar with piebald patterns in horses it made sense that she’d know about this aspect of it as well. “It is, but almost all blue dyes eventually fade into an ugly green,” she replied with a grimace. “And those that don’t are more violet than blue,” she added, wrinkling her nose at the very thought of  _ purple _ hair. 

“And red doesn’t fade to pink?” 

“Nope. Pink’s its own color for some reason.” 

Victoria had actually tried bubblegum pink once, on a dare from her then girlfriend Isabelle. It hadn’t looked as nauseating girly as she’d expected it would but she’d still huffed and moaned about it for the entire week she’d needed to wait until it was safe to dye it again. 

“I think on  _ normal _ hair red might turn orangey eventually, but since mine’s white to begin with and not yellow from traditional bleaching...” she trailed off as Maria’s face contorted all of a sudden, as if she were remembering something extremely unpleasant about her own hair dying experiences, maybe?

Victoria wanted to ask if she’d accidentally said something triggering, but before she could even begin to formulate the question on her lips Maria’s breathing grew ragged and shallow and her body began to sway back and forth. It was a nearly universal sign of a Little on the verge of a panic drop, and without even thinking Victoria pulled Maria back into her arms, turning the girl’s body so her head could rest on her shoulder. “Woah, hey, I’ve got you. I’ve got you,” Victoria soothed as she struggled to keep the two of them standing upright. 

She thought about slowly lowering them both down to the floor but the idea of sitting on the freezing cold tile for a second time was much too unpleasant to bare. No, she needed to get Maria out of the bathroom and into one of the bedrooms where she could properly Caretaker her if it came to it. She honestly wasn’t sure if Maria was actually going to drop, but even if she didn’t she still needed her support right now. If not as a Big, then as a friend.

“Come on, let’s get out of the bathroom. If we can make it into mine and Izzy’s room I have just the thing that might help you,” Victoria instructed as she began to walk the two of them towards the door. 


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in posting. We’ve had two unrelated and unexpected deaths in the family this past month and things have been kinda all over the place. 
> 
> This chapter ends really suddenly but honestly I’m struggling to find the motivation to finish this fic. I really want to. I’m so freaking close to being done but getting the words “on paper” is taking so much longer than I’d like it to. I was hoping to start posting the new fic before Christmas but we’ll see how it goes. This one was meant to be finished before July 4th and that didn’t happen lol. 
> 
> Also I’m aware I skipped over what upset Maria in the previous chapter but I’ll hopefully come back around to that in a future chapter.

Once again Maria wasn’t sure how she got to where she was now. Okay, so that wasn’t quite true. She was pretty certain Agent Hand had carried her flailing, panicked ass out of the bathroom and into the bedroom of their hotel, but the fact she didn’t remember any of it was what bothered her most. Memory loss had never really been a side effect of her less than healthy panic drops. Maybe it was the fact that she  _ hadn’t _ dropped that she couldn’t remember? Wait, why hadn’t she dropped? 

“Nnnnnnnnnnnhhh,” she groaned, turning over in the cocoon of blankets currently bundled around her no longer wet, no longer shivering form. Not only had the other woman carried her to bed but she’d also changed her out of her bathing suit and into someone’s pajamas. They weren’t  _ her _ pajamas, but they were soft and warm and smelled faintly like baby powder. Natasha’s then. Or rather, Natty’s. 

“A ‘Nnnnnnnnnhhhhh’ to you, too,” Victoria’s amused voice replied back somewhere above Maria’s right ear. 

“Sssss’nooot funny,” Maria responded, her words muffled by the terrycloth currently pressed against her face. Victoria’s bathrobe no doubt. Shifting her upper body to the right, Maria found herself moaning happily as her nose and cheek suddenly came in contact with the Big’s flushed, still slightly damp skin. “You smell so goooood,” she told her friend as she inhaled deeply. 

Maria was kinda expecting a witty comment back. Something along the lines of not letting Natasha hear her say that, but instead the Big simply began playing with her hair, an action which honest to god almost brought tears to Maria’s eyes. 

Okay that’s another lie, she actually  _ was _ crying now. How mortifying to be so fucked up inside that a goddamn pat to the head like a dog was enough to tip her over the edge. It’s not like she didn’t get enough physical comfort from her Soulmate or Siblings these days, so why was she once again acting like a severely touch starved and emotionally malnourished childhood neglect victim? 

But even more distressing to her right now was the fact that she still wasn’t dropped.

Dropping was how she had always dealt with these sorts of feelings in the past. Technically it was how  _ all _ Littles dealt with overwhelming situations. When you looked at human biological differences, the main thing that separated Littles from Bigs was their inability to process extreme emotions while in their normal adult headspaces. It was the fundamental reason why they even  _ had _ childlike headspaces to begin with. 

Even though the act of dropping most often generated a sense of enjoyment and pleasure within the Little, it’s main purpose was the avoidance of distress and emotional pain. Maria wasn’t so much in emotional pain, but she  _ was _ distressed. So why wasn’t she dropped?

“I’d like to ask you a question Maria, one that’s going to be extremely personal and potentially upsetting to think about, let alone discuss. I’d appreciate an answer though. I think it will help all of us moving forward if we ripped this particular bandaid off in one go.”

Maria’s entire body tensed in anticipation, though she didn’t pull her face away from her friend’s exposed chest. Her eyes were still leaking tears but she hadn’t fully begun to sob. It was only a matter of time though before she was bawling like a baby. She didn’t even know what Victoria was going to ask but from the way she’d prefaced her question it was clearly going to be something gutpunching. 

“‘Kay,” Maria whispered with a slight nod of her head. As nervous as she was to hear the woman’s question, she was also kind of hoping it would end up being the straw that pushed the proverbial camel over into a much needed drop. 

Victoria remained silent for a few moments, her hand still smoothing over and through Maria’s damp, tangled hair. Eventually though her hand paused in its motion, coming to rest gently on the crown of Maria’s head. “How much do you remember about your time with Coulson in Bogota?”

That… was not the question that Maria had been expecting. In fact, that wasn’t even in the  _ ballpark _ of what she’d been expecting to come from the other woman’s lips. Shifting her arms from beneath her she began to push herself up off of Victoria’s chest. 

“Hey, no, no, don’t get up. Stay,” Victoria insisted, reaching her arms out and pulling Maria back down against her. 

Maria grumbled petulantly at the act of being manhandled but as soon her cheek was resting once again on Victoria’s skin she quieted down. “Is this some new method of Little interrogation that I haven’t been told of yet? Because I think HR would have a field day if they found out you’ve been holding enemy combatants against your bosom in order to get them to talk,” she commented after a moment, hoping she could prolong the inevitable with some off-brand humor. 

Victoria made a noise that sounded like a puff of air leaving her nostrils. “My  _ bosom? _ Really? Coulson did tell me you had an old soul but I didn’t realize he’d meant ‘Europe in the 1100’s’ old.”

“You’re deflecting my deflection,” Maria replied back, wrinkling her nose at the thought of Coulson talking about her in such a way. It’s not that she disagreed with the assessment but it honestly felt a little strange hearing about how thoroughly they’d discussed her behind her back. And then to have her ask about Bogota? Of all places? Oh god, had she known she was a Little all this time as well?

“Indeed I am. How ‘bout I help you along? I’ll ask you questions and you can grunt once for ‘yes’ and twice for ‘no’.”

Maria rolled her eyes as she pulled her arm from beneath her and flashed Victoria the bird. “How ‘bout one middle finger for ‘yes’ and two for ‘no’?”

This time Victoria actually let out a laugh instead of just a puff of air. “Oh man, Phil was totally right about you. You’re a total brat when you want to be.” 

Maria wiggled her still raised middle finger. “And this isn’t even my final form,” she replied with a grin before letting her arm drop back down to Victoria’s stomach. Without even thinking she gripped the fuzzy bathrobe between her fingers the same way a child would their parent’s clothing. “In all honesty I’m not really a fan of the 20 Questions format. It’s much too easy to lead someone into confessing something that may not actually be true. If you really want to know about Bogota you’re gonna have to be more direct about it.”

Victoria must have nodded her head in understanding since her bosom bounced half a dozen times beneath Maria’s cheek. “I should have started with this, but in case you were wondering, I really didn’t know about your status until this past week. Whatever Coulson and Fury knew and for however long they knew it, they kept it tight to their chests.”

“Wait a second. Spies  _ keeping _ secrets? Who’d ever heard of such a thing? Ow!” Maria jumped reflexively, reaching up and rubbing at the ear her friend had just pinched. She was actually more surprised than she was in pain. “How the hell do you get away with doing that to Bobbi? That girl’s got weapons in places even  _ Nat _ wouldn’t risk storing them.”

“I’d never pinch Bobbi to try and correct her behavior. That cheeky monkey Brother of hers on the other hand… You’ve never met Lance, which is probably a good thing, all things considered, but you remind me a lot of him sometimes. Especially your sass. Clint likes to think of himself as sassy but even his best quips wouldn’t hold a candle to some of the stuff that comes out of Little Hunter’s mouth.”

Maria continued to rub at her ear, intentionally using her arm to shield her incredibly confused expression from Victoria’s eyes. Talk about a complete 180 in topics of discussion. Was there a reason the Big was suddenly name dropping her extended family members? Maria didn’t know much about Lance Hunter other than the fact he was Bobbi’s ex-husband and had been the one to get her pregnant back in college. 

“You’re confused about where I’m going with all of this, aren’t you?”

Maria let her arm drop back down though she didn’t grip onto Victoria’s bathrobe this time. “Hell yes I’m confused. You wanted to ask me about Coulson but then start talking about your Heartmate’s ex?” She was honestly more frustrated than she was annoyed. It felt like they were playing emotional hopscotch or something. Was Natasha really that unusual in how direct she was when discussing serious, important topics?

“I’m sorry that I’m being so obtuse, it honestly wasn’t my intention when I started this discussion. I guess what I’m trying to say is, when you and Coulson were alone together in Bogota, do you think there’s the possibility that you may have bonded while you were delirious? 

“I’m going to be one hundred percent honest with you right now, Maria, it really does seem like you and Coulson are Heartmates, and that maybe one of you is resisting making it official for some reason. I’m just trying to figure out which one of you is being the infuriatingly stubborn one so I know who really does deserve a pinch to the ear and then some. Izzy thinks it’s you, but my money’s on Phil.”

“Um-- say what now?” Maria floundered, her heart rate picking up as her head began to spin with the absurdity of Victoria’s extremely long, run on statement. Her and Coulson?  _ Heartmates? _ There’s no way he could have been that to her and not have mentioned it. She knew she had dropped and called him  _ Papa _ in Bogota but she had also called Laura  _ Momma _ and that hadn’t meant they were Heartmates. What the hell was Hand talking about? There’s no way Phil was her Papa. There was no way he was her Heartmate and had kept it a secret from her, right?


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas everyone! Or Happy Holidays for those who don't celebrate :) Here's a lovely cliffhanger for you all to groan and roll your eyes over this evening lol. I have no school or work for almost a month now so I'm hoping I'll get this story wrapped up real soon.
> 
> Thank you for all your kind words about my family situation. I'm going to get around to replying to them all individually hopefully later today. And thank you everyone who's still reading and enjoying. This fic is taking forever but as long as you guys are interested in me finishing it then that is what I'm going to try to do. I already have two unfinished stories in my ledger, I don't wanna add a third lol. Plus I do love this one, it's just slooow lol. So much going on! So much I'm probably not even going to get to include :(

Natasha gasped, not having believed Victoria would actually spill that particular secret to Maria. She pulled her ear away from the door she was pressed against and cast a glance around the room behind her. Clint was sitting on the sofa with a blissed out, meditative Bobbi laying across his lap. The girl had her “extreme quiet time” headphones on which meant she was in no mood or condition to plot with her. Clint would have been her next choice except he’d already made it perfectly clear he didn’t approve of her spying on her Soulmate in the other room.

As if he’d never sat outside her bedroom door with a cup to his ear while she and Bobbi got it on without him during a “girls night in”.

_ Hypocrite,  _ she signed in Auslan when he glanced in her direction. He didn’t bother responding in any of the six sign languages she knew he knew and instead gave her a good old fashion middle finger salute. 

Which was whatever. It’s not like Natasha actually  _ needed _ him for the plan she was concocting in her head. Nope, the one that she needed was currently dozing face first in a bowl of soggy Cheerios. 

“Hey, psst, Ellybean,” Natasha whispered, all too aware of her continued proximity to the door and the fact that she had to keep her voice down or risk alerting those inside to her eavesdropping. “Psshhppsstpsssttt.”

“Hey, my daughter is  _ not _ a cat, Nat,” Isabelle interrupted, rolling her eyes in Natasha’s general direction. The Big didn’t seem all too concerned with the fact that her child was possibly seconds away from drowning herself in a puddle of cornmeal mush so Natasha simply ignored her and made the noise again. 

Eventually Elly popped her head up and it took all the willpower that Natasha currently possessed not to start laughing at how adorable the two year old looked, sitting there all groggy like with milk and bits of cheerios dripping off her face. She couldn’t help but briefly wonder if Natty ever looked that cutely innocent when she was dropped. 

“Uh-oh,” Elly gasped playfully, her previous exhaustion seemingly having melted away as soon as she’d realized what was on her face. “Uh-oh!” she repeated, reaching up and picking a piece of cereal off her cheek and popping it into her mouth. “Mommy uh-oh!” The toddler took another piece of cereal but this time held it out towards Isabelle. 

“Uh-oh indeed! Nom-nom-nom,” Isabelle replied back with a much higher than usual pitch to her voice. The Big then leaned sideways towards her daughter and sucked the offered cheerior into her mouth with the help of her tongue. Despite having initiated the action, Elly still squealed in surprise, as if she’d never expected her Mom to  _ do _ such a thing. 

As Natasha watched the two of them interact an unpleasant ache began forming in her chest. She couldn’t help but miss her own Momma back in Malibu. Her Dada too, but mostly her Momma right now. Pepper  _ loved _ playing silly games while feeding Natty her baby food. Tony mostly got her to eat by threatening to eat it all himself if she didn’t open up and take a bite. Even though her Little self hated mushed peas and carrots, she hated the idea of sharing what was meant to be hers and hers alone even  _ more. _ Tony had discovered that fact about her less than twenty four hours after finding out they were Heartmates. It was infuriating sometimes how much of a genius he truly was. 

“Nat, you alright?” Isabelle’s voice brought her out of her thoughts and she nodded quickly, rubbing at her cheeks because they were itchy and not at all because they were damp. 

“Mhmm,” she responded, wincing at how unconvincing she sounded. Even though a part of her was aching for her Heartmates, the person that she  _ really _ wanted at that moment was on the other side of the door. A door she’d promised not to open without prior verbal consent. A door she was seriously considering throwing an all out tantrum against.  _ She _ wasn’t supposed to open it, but no one had told her that those on the other side couldn’t open it in response to her having a meltdown.

“Hey Gabrielle, you know who I think would like some of your cheerios? Your Momma. You wanna give your Momma some sloppy cheerio kisses?” 

Natasha pulled her hands away from her cheeks just in time to see the two year old nod her head eagerly. The milk and mush that hadn’t already dripped off her face went flying in response, most of it landing on Isabelle since she was still hunched over the girl. Again something inside Natasha’s chest tightened painfully but she ignored it in favor of scrambling up to her feet. 

“You’re not gonna tell her I guilted you into it?” she asked as she eagerly made her way across the hotel living room towards the small dining table. She already had her arms out to pick up the toddler, though her eyes remained solely on Isabelle as she neared. The last thing she wanted to do was get the woman in trouble for agreeing to her scheme. 

“Nah, you’re good. They’ve been in there long enough to deal with whatever they needed to deal with. And if they really don’t want you in there just yet I’m sure one of them will make it known. Preferably  _ without _ weapons.”

Natasha snorted and gestured at Gabrielle. “Why do you think I’m bringing her? Maria might be pissed off enough to shoot me, but precious little Ellybean?  _ Never.”  _

Isabelle narrowed her eyes a tad bit. “Should I be concerned that your plan involves using my two year old as a human shield?”

Natasha grinned but didn’t otherwise respond, instead motioning with her hands for the girl in question to raise her arms up. Despite the previous incident in the bathroom where she’d accidentally scared the girl, Elly didn’t hesitate to lift up her arms in consent to being picked up. 

“Oooof, you’re getting so big!” Natasha exclaimed as she hoisted the girl off the chair and onto her hip. Elly giggled in response and wrapped her bare legs around Natasha’s torso. 

“Good luck you two,” Isabelle told them as she pressed a zip-locked baggie filled with dry cheerios into her daughter’s hand. “To help with your cover,” she quickly explained with a grin. 

Natasha would have leant down and hugged the woman for being so cool with what she was about to do, but she knew if she did she’d run the risk of losing Elly back into her Mommy’s arms. The girl may not have been scared of her anymore but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t jump ship back to her mother at the first possible moment. Something Natasha could definitely relate to now that she actually had Heartmates of her own. Not that she would ever admit that out loud to either of them of course. 

“Alright my little munchkin, let’s go see your Mommy,”  _ and my Maria, _ she added silently in her head. 

Walking back across the living room, Natasha stopped in front of the closed master bedroom door. She raised her hand to knock but then thought better of it, instead looking at Elly and then motioning to the door. “Wanna knock?” she asked, instinctively leaning her body closer so that the two year old could actually reach it if she wanted to try.

Elly looked confused for a split second but then a large grin erupted across her face. Natasha smiled back and leant her upper body even closer, thinking she was helping, but in the end Elly had  _ other _ ideas on how to knock. 

“Knot-Knot Momma!” Elly shrilled, her mouth painfully close to Natasha’s ear. The two year old then began kicking one of her pudgy feet against the door. “Knot-Knot!”

Natasha heard Isabelle laughing on the other side of the room but more importantly she could also hear movement  _ inside _ the bedroom.  _ Please don’t be angry with me. Please don’t be angry with me. _ She’d already received a black eye from her Soulmate that morning, she didn’t think she’d be able to handle being rejected or yelled at by her as well. 

“Who’s there?!” Victoria’s voice drifted through the door, followed by some inaudible whispering and more physical shifting around. It was clear from the squeaky springs noises that the two occupants were laying on the oversized bed inside. That calmed Natasha’s nerves a slight bit. At least Maria was allowing the Big to comfort her and wasn’t hiding beneath the mattress or anything. 

“Knot-Knot!” Elly replied back, shaking her thankfully sealed bag of cheerios in her hands excitedly. 

“You’re supposed to say your name when they ask ‘who’s there?’” Natasha corrected, tilting her head back just in time to avoid being smacked in the already bruised eye by the plastic baggie the girl was waving about. 

“Momma Knot-Knot!!” Elly ignored Natasha’s instructions and began pounding her toes against the door. She was clearly growing impatient with the game.

“Nat, it’s alright. Bring her inside before she hurts herself. It’s not locked,” Victoria instructed, having correctly guessed who else was on the other side of the door. Then again it wasn’t much of a challenge was it? Who else in their group would have encouraged the toddler to interrupt their alone time? Bobbi would have just barged in on her own if she’d really wanted her Heartmate, and most likely Isabelle would have just called if there had been a crisis unfolding and she’d needed to reach her Soulmate. 

Okay so Clint would probably do it, except for the fact that he wasn’t all that close to Agent Hand. If it had been Agent Coulson locking himself away on the other side of a door then you can bet your sweet ass he would have abused Natty’s cuteness in order to worm his way inside. On the flip side, if Clint had thought  _ Ria _ really needed him he would have probably already gone in guns ablazing. 

As upset as Natasha was about Maria’s freakout in the pool earlier, Clint was feeling at least ten times worse. He didn’t show it of course, but Natasha knew him well enough to know he was bottling it all up inside for a release at a later time. Whereas Natasha felt guilty for  _ not _ being there when Ria needed her, Clint felt guilty for actually being there and not having been able to prevent the incident from occurring in the first place. 

“Nat? It’s okay, you can come in. I’m fine now, I promise,” Maria’s voice piped up, snapping Natasha out of her thoughts. She hadn’t realized she’d been standing there with her hand on the doorknob for so long. 

Swallowing down a sudden influx of nerves, Natasha turned the handle and pushed open the door. 


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy belated New Years everyone! Here’s the next chapter. I’m not sure if the “story” referenced at the end will be further explained in this fic or if I’ll maybe do a side fic in the future about it. Probably the latter, to be perfectly honest lol. Next chapter is gonna have a small time jump and will be just Natasha and Maria. The two have a lot to talk about before I bring this fic to a close. 
> 
> Thank you as always to everyone who’s reading and leaving comments. You guys are the absolute best.

Victoria couldn’t help the large, goofy smile that spread across her face at the sight of her daughter. It was an unconscious response at this point, one that was almost always coupled with one or two skips of her heartbeat. They were the good kinds of skips though, not the nervous or otherwise bad kinds. They were the kind that illustrated how much she loved her baby girl, and not how absolutely terrified she was that she was going to screw something up. She hadn’t experienced  _ those _ kinds of skips in a really, really long time. 

“Knot knot Momma!” Elly squealed, one of her pudgy toddler arms reaching out towards her. The other one was currently wrapped around a plastic zip lock bag filled with food, no doubt. Hopefully something dry like cereal and not sticky like apple slices. Victoria huffed a laugh under her breath as her stomach suddenly growled at the thought of food. It felt like ages since they’d eaten breakfast, when in reality it couldn’t have been more than three or four hours. 

“Who’s there, baby girl?” Victoria asked, continuing to play along even though it was clear the two year old didn’t have a complete grasp of the game just yet. Still she would always encourage her daughter to be playful and outgoing,  _ especially _ when someone other than herself or Izzy was holding her. 

Victoria watched as Natasha walked the two of them closer to the bed, her head bent low as she whispered into the girl’s ear. Elly paused waving her hand, her tiny face scrunching up as if in concentration. After a few seconds she resumed her flailing and turned her attention back towards the bed.

“Boo! Boo, boo, boo!” Elly practically shrieked, her little legs peddling the empty air by Natasha’s waist.

Victoria smiled, her arm instinctively tightening around the woman still laying pressed against her. Maria hadn’t moved or made a sound since they’d been interrupted but she could tell by her still pleasant pheromones that she wasn’t upset in the least. In fact there had been a definite spike in sweetness the moment Natasha appeared in the doorway. Victoria couldn’t help but wonder if that’s how she smelt to Bobbi whenever Isabelle was nearby. Bobbi’s own scent didn’t change that much when Clint came around, but that was most likely due to the fact the two still weren’t officially bonded just yet.

“Boo who?” Victoria asked, raising a brow at the duo. She wasn’t sure how in depth Natasha’s instructions to her daughter had been, or if the toddler would be able to figure this part of the joke out on her own. 

Elly scrunched her face up again, though this time not in concentration but in confusion. Her arms and legs stopped moving and she looked briefly at Natasha before looking back at the bed. “Momma no cry,” she whispered, twisting her upper body now in a weak attempt to wriggle out of Natasha’s grasp. Victoria knew from experience if the girl had truly wanted down she’d have begun squirming and screaming and thrashing about. It was a behavior she’d unfortunately picked up after watching one of Little Bobbi’s sensitivity meltdowns.

“Come here and give Momma a hug then,” Victoria insisted, reaching out with the arm that wasn’t currently wrapped around Maria. 

Without needing any more prompting, Natasha crossed the few remaining feet to the bed and leant forward, depositing the two year old into her lap. Maybe it was the poor lighting in the room, but it was only at that point that Victoria noticed the black eye slowly blooming across Natasha’s face. Despite knowing the girl had suffered far worse afflictions in her life, she still couldn’t help but wince at how tender that must have been. 

Before Victoria could open her mouth to ask if the girl had put ice on her wound, Elly began squealing and bouncing up and down in her spot straddling her thighs. She wanted her Momma’s attention and as fond as she was of Natasha, the two year old would always win out. Well, the  _ actual _ two year old, to be more precise. Besides, Maria had a perfectly good mouth, she could always be the one to inquire about her Soulmate’s wellbeing. 

Unfortunately Maria seemed just as uncertain as her partner, the two girls staring at each other silently from half a dozen feet away. Her scent hadn’t changed though, or if anything, it had grown a bit thicker. More encapsulating, in a way. Or perhaps that was just the effect of both girls being in the same room with her. Then again they certainly hadn’t smelt that way at any prior point in their vacation. 

“Come lay with us, Nat. You’re already in here, you may as well,” Victoria prompted, attempting to scoot herself across the bed to make room for the newcomer. Only before she could shift more than an inch away Maria began to whimper, her arms tightening around her midsection, keeping her immobilized in her spot. 

To say Victoria was shocked would have been an understatement. She already knew Maria was now content with her as a source of comfort, but she’d have never guessed that things had progressed  _ this _ far. That the girl would actually prefer  _ her _ in that moment instead of her own Soulmate. Add to that the fact that she wasn’t even  _ dropped. _

Victoria needed to do something, and fast. She could already feel the distress building inside of Natasha and the last thing any of them needed was for the girl to turn around and bolt. “I was just telling Maria a story about Belgrade, another B city if you hadn’t noticed the running theme at SHIELD just yet. Phil and I were--”

“Coulson wasn’t  _ in _ Belgrade. He was on assignment in Jakarta during the hostage--”

“I’m not referring to the hostage crisis, Nat. This uh…. This may come as a shock to you, but you're not the only agent who’s been able to crack SHIELD’s security protocols over the years,” Victoria responded, though she quickly winced at the stunned and hurt look that was now spreading across Natasha’s face. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I was just trying to say that not all missions make it into the official record keeping books these days.”

Even though Natasha wasn’t the only agent who’d been able to break into their systems, she technically  _ was _ the reason that Director Fury had started moonlighting some of his top agents. The fact that those missions mainly consisted of making sure that the girl’s past remained truly in her past probably wouldn’t have made her feel any better about the whole thing, and as such, Victoria opted to keep that particular bit of information to herself. 

Besides, Belgrade was actually one of the few off-the-record missions that had absolutely nothing to do with Natasha Romanoff. 

“Momma story time?” Elly’s inquisitive voice broke the growing silence in the room. Three sets of eyes quickly turned to the girl, who squirmed a bit shyly at the sudden attention. Even though the toddler was growing more and more comfortable with Natasha, Maria was still pretty much a stranger to her. 

Victoria shifted her daughter around in her lap so that the girl’s back was pressed against her chest. The two pillows she’d previously shoved behind her back kept both of their upper bodies elevated enough that she felt comfortable opening the girl’s snack for her as well. Maria had her own pillow to lean against, though she seemed to prefer remaining on her side with her head resting on Victoria’s shoulder. 

“It  _ is _ storytime, baby girl. You wanna share some of your cereal with your aunties?” Victoria couldn’t help but laugh when the two year old shook her head, clutching her baggie closer to her chest. “But seriously, Nat, come lay down with us. You’ll like this story too, I promise. And then afterwards we can all get dressed and crack open some of whatever Clint brought in that actual, literal wine cooler of his.”

Natasha wrinkled her nose at the suggestion, though that in and of itself didn’t mean she wasn’t amenable to it. It could just be that she had advanced knowledge of what Clint believed was an appropriate selection of alcohol for a family vacation. 

“Nat, I’m fine, really. I want you to lay down with us. Please?” Maria eventually piped up, lifting the arm that had previously been draped across Victoria’s stomach so she could make grabby hands at her Soulmate.

At Maria’s request, the tension Natasha had been carrying seemed to physically melt off of her, and without needing any more prompting the girl climbed onto the mattress and stretched herself along Victoria’s vacant side. “Yeah, okay, I’ll listen to the story. But first I have to ask, has Vick shown you her tummy heart yet?”

Victoria couldn’t stop the groan from leaving her lips at the mention of the unpigmented skin on her abdomen. “It’s not a  _ heart, _ Nat. I really don’t understand why you and Bobbi insist--”

“You have a tummy heart? I wanna see the tummy heart,” Maria’s soft, though clearly enthusiastic voice interrupted, drawing Victoria’s attention away from her own discomfort and back towards the Little laying against her side. Even though Maria wasn’t dropped she was still giving off ‘I can haz comfort?’ vibes, and in the end that’s what this entire vacation was about, right? Proving that those outside of her immediate found family could be trusted with her emotions, and maybe even her heart? 

Sighing, Victoria shifted her daughter so the girl was now laying in the crevice between hers and Natasha’s bodies. Next she undid the belt holding the two halves of her robe together and slowly pulled the fabric apart. Thankfully she wasn’t completely naked beneath the robe, having managed to find and pull on some sleep shorts while Maria had still been unconscious earlier. 

“Oh my gosh, it  _ is _ a tummy heart,” Maria gasped, her voice and expression both filled with something akin to awe. Without waiting for Victoria to respond or react, Maria scooted down the mattress and laid her cheek on a section of discolored skin next to Victoria’s navel. 

The ‘tummy heart’, as Bobbi and Natasha liked to call it, started a few inches below her breasts and ending just above the waistband of her shorts. If Victoria were being perfectly honest with herself, it  _ did _ kind of look like a weirdly stretched out heart, at least from the perspective of those looking at it directly. Looking down at her own stomach all she saw was the reason she could never wear a bikini or crop top while growing up. 

That being said, she couldn’t help the fluttering in her chest at the adorable way Maria was reacting to seeing her deformity. As if her discolored skin was precious or something. A ridiculously absurd notion indeed. 

“Alright, I’m sorry, I have to ask. What exactly is the appeal to you guys? Bobbi did the exact same thing the first time she saw my stomach. Okay, actually she  _ licked _ it first, I guess thinking I might taste different where I looked different?” Victoria scrunched her own nose up at the memory. This had been back before she’d truly understood the extent of Bobbi’s illness. Nowadays she didn’t even blink when she saw her Heartmate licking different patches of carpet in order to see how they compared to each other.

“You probably  _ do _ taste different. You certainly smell different down here. Oh god, that’s not what I meant,” Maria sat up quickly, her face turning bright red in obvious embarrassment. 

Natasha giggled from her spot still cuddled against Victoria's other side. “No one thinks you meant  _ that, _ Masha. Relax.” Natasha reached across and prodded her girlfriend in her own stomach. 

On reflex Maria whined and curled in on herself, shying away from Natasha’s hand and eventually shifting to lay herself back down. 

Victoria was thankful the girl didn’t rest her head on her stomach again since this meant she could close up her robe. 

“Maria’s right, though. You  _ do _ smell differently there. It’s kinda like how our pheromones change when we get sunburnt. The scent comes through our skin, right? So it makes sense there would be a difference where your skin is different. It’s not a better or worse smell, mind you. It’s just, ya know,  _ different.” _

Victoria was going to have to think about all of this later, preferably after one or more of whatever drinks Clint had brought. In the meantime though she had the perfect distraction for both herself and the girls. “Soooo, getting back on track, here’s the story of how Phil accidentally seduced the son of the Prime Minister of Serbia.”


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not a chapter - but a summary of how this story would have ended, as well as an apology :(

Okay my lovelies, I hate to do this but I think I’m throwing in the towel on this fic. It was meant to be finished before July 4th of 2019 and we’re heading into February 2020 so yeah….. Epic fail on my part. 

I’ve just been struggling a lot lately with depression and time management and things, and then suddenly a week ago I get promoted to a position at my work that I am in no way qualified for, which is a thousand times more anxiety producing than my old job, but is also more money than I’ve ever made before in my life. I mean, I’m talking real adult levels of money. Enough money I could pay off my six figure student debt and maybe even move out of my parents house in the next year or two *cries in millenial*.

That being said, I honestly don’t see myself sitting down and finishing the ending to this fic anymore. I’ve got so many responsibilities now and I’m just scared shitless I’m going to fuck something up lol. Writing used to be my stress relief but with this fic it’s honestly more like a chore I feel I have to complete because I made a promise to do so. It’s not fun anymore and that’s not really what writing should be about. At least writing I’m not getting paid for lol.

Keep in mind I’m not throwing in the towel on this series in general, just this specific fic. I do have another one that I’d started months ago that I’d been wanting to post only after this one was finished and well, I think it’s time to let that one out of the bag. So expect a new fic from me probably sometime later today. It’ll be Steve and Natasha and will take place post Avengers, but before The Winter Soldier. I have about 7k words already written which is broken up into two chapters. I may try breaking it up into more or just hold off posting the second part for a week or so, we’ll see. 

Anyway, I also wanted to give you guys a summary of how this waterpark fic was going to end, since some of the information is important for later aspects of this storyverse.

The next few chapters were going to be Natasha and Maria spending some quality alone time in a bathtub, just enjoying each others company. No hanky panky lol. They were going to talk about stuff that’s been bothering them, stuff that I brought up in the fic, like Bobbi and Clint seeing a fertility specialist, the fact that Bobbi and Clint aren’t bonded yet, etc. Mostly slice of life stuff, about their relationship with each other and their relationship with the other two Bears. In the end they come to the conclusion that Bobbi and Clint are putting their own lives on hold (or keeping important parts secret) because the four are still very much entwined into one large relationship.

The four still live together in the Bears apartment, there are still crossovers between who sleeps with who (Maria sometimes with Bobbi, and Nat very occasionally with Bobbi and Clint). Everyone at work considers them one family unit (those that don’t know Maria is a Little thinks she’s Natasha’s Big). But the fact is, they really are two separate relationships that are at two separate points in where their relationship is, and by continuing to live together so closely they are holding each other back. 

It was going to be really sad and angsty the two of them coming to this realization, but was going to end on a happy note with them starting to come up with ideas on what they wanted to do, just the two of them. Things like finding their own apartment, how they would furnish it, possibly getting married (in secret, or possibly in the open if Maria decides to “come out” officially). They think that by doing this that Bobbi and Clint will finally bond themselves (and probably get married) and everyone would be happier for it in the end.

So yeah, now that I type it up into a summary it doesn’t sound as “oooh, aaaahh” as I thought it might be lol. Maybe that’s because it’s just the basic idea and not the specific dialogue I had in mind. Anyway, it gets the point across that this fic was meant to be the end of the Four Bears and the start of the two pairs as their own independent relationships. I don’t really mean the end of the Four Bears in general though, so please don’t think they don’t still consider each other Siblings, or that they don’t still spend most of their time with each other, but it’s a sense of growing up and growing apart, becoming independent of the other. It’s meant to be the start of each pairs future in the Littleverse.

Anyway, I’m really sorry I couldn’t get it typed out properly into chapters for you. I really wanted to but alas, it’s just not going to happen. I hope this little apology and summary helps ease the disappointment though. I know I have two other fics I stopped without any warning or closure at all :(

Also wanted to thank everyone that’s been coming along for this ride, especially those who have been here from the beginning, and those who comment or leave kudos :) You guys are all very special to me, just as this fic is so very much important to me. I’m hoping now that I’ve put this story to bed that my writers block will be lifted and I won’t have this much trouble updating the new one. I guess only time will tell!

\--Romanoffonamor


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